Monthly Archives: May 2012

I Like- Guy

It’s Tuesday, and a super Tuesday at that. It started out a bit awry, a bit drizzly as I walked to the bus stop. I listened to Robert Owens ‘I’ll be Your Friend’ a club song from back in the day. I heard it in a porno the other day and sought it out, and uploaded it. It mixed well with the Dopestyle cut, “I’ll Bass You”. I know I heard it in the East Village and it may have been at the Pyramid or the World. Classic cut. Can’t find Dopestyle anywhere though (I just did). As I waited for the bus, I ran into Richard Castro once again. He was headed home and waiting for his bus. We chatted for a while until my bus showed up, with Chief behind the wheel.

At the next stop, downstairs neighbor Deborah got on board the bus and I filled her in on what’s been going on the past week or so with regards to the cigar shack. It was several giggles worth as we headed into the tunnel where we were quite delayed by a major traffic accident. If it weren’t for each other’s company we probably would have been climbing the walls. We discussed this here blog, how I followed a lawyer friend’s advice seven years ago when I started. To protect myself then as well as now, the job is never mentioned by name or address and the names have been changed to protect the idiots.

Deborah thought that was good advice. I know Bill thinks so as well since he has discussed this with his boss, a pro bono lawyer at one of Manhattan’s largest law firms. So my ass is covered by the first amendment. As I walked up to the cigar shack I played a David Bowie playlist. I’ve been playing it a lot lately. So many great songs by David, I ended with Repetition from the Lodger album, which was actually the first Bowie album I ever bought for myself. I always had access to my brother’s and sister’s albums but this one was mine and it wasn’t the Bowie they had remembered.

I made it into the cigar shack later than expected but I did have the foresight to inform Bradley about the accident and my being tardy. He replied ‘No worries’ and I figured that was that. It was Thomas and Bradley today, Zack was off and Jerry Vale was out as well. Since the cigar lounge, man cave has been shut down things have crawled considerably. Not much foot traffic at all coming through the door and it reflected in the sales.

Most of the regulars have stopped coming in, they stopped coming in before the man cave shut down. They’re visiting other cigar places throughout Manhattan, Brooklyn and even Hoboken. Perhaps word got out about how Zack talks shit about them, how Zack says that the cigar shack doesn’t need their business.

That’s how Zack does it. He talks shit about everyone. Which makes it all the more surprising that when shit gets spoken about him he doesn’t necessarily handle it well. And the customers do talk shit about Zack as well. I just paid witness to it, occasionally stepping in to defend Zack but overall I would let them spew forth. No harm no foul, like GZA would say.

I had lunch and a free cigar that a salesman gave me when stopping by earlier in the day. I came back and it was Thomas’ turn to go. I kept myself busy once again, heeding Zack’s axiom- ‘If you’re leaning, you ain’t cleaning’. So witty and yet so clichéd.

To my surprise Zack came in, looking so damn hot in his cigar shack polo shirt. Woof! And then after Zack made his appearance, the next walk in was the inhumane resources person Aaron Burr. Aaron Burr busied himself while in the cigar shack by calling the cigar shack, not realizing he was in the cigar shack it seemed.

A trip to the loo was in order for me and in the loo I could hear the man cave doors opening and closing. I came out and Bradley mentioned that Zack and Aaron Burr wanted to see me in the man cave. I knew a three way wasn’t in order, especially since I used the condoms I usually carry with me on Ruben and Albert Ross last week. I walked in and Aaron Burr stood up while Zack sat there looking fly in his cigar shack polo shirt.

Thanks to former genital massager Marcus telling Zack about this here blog, and sexy Zack with his betrayed ego informed the inhumane resources person- Aaron Burr. Aaron Burr said words to the effect that my blog reflected poorly on the cigar shack and they weren’t having it. They couldn’t very well tell me not to write it, especially since the actual company name has never been used since I started doing time at the cigar shack and the names had been changed to protect the idiots. I actually thought they might have been talking about the other cigar shack blog that I write, that Zack felt wasn’t as witty as this here blog.

So Zack and Aaron Burr asked for the keys to the cigar shack, the drawers. Not a problem. I removed them and handed them over. I was dismissed after getting told I would be paid for the rest of the day. I wonder if my commission will be sent with my final paycheck, since I technically did not do anything wrong so I suppose I will have to wait and see. I saw Thomas and told him goodbye. He was shocked but also had an idea. Bradley once again did his best possum imitation, hiding in plain sight. I shook Thomas’ hand and said ‘cheers’ to everyone else and walked out the door shoulders back, head held high.

I called Bill and told him the news. Chatted with Annemarie and told her the news. Posted on Facebook, and immediately messages of support and dismay came pouring in from friends, family and cigar shack customers. Most everyone knew how unhappy I was working at the cigar shack. And I was unhappy, yet willing to give Zack my support. I remember May 12, 2011 when it was announced that Zack was going to be the manager. I congratulated him and wished him well and shaking his hand while the possum turned beet red and did nothing of the sort.

I also prevented a couple of attempts at what may have been an inside job of someone trying to steal boxes of cigars that were placed with the empty cigar boxes that we give away. Perhaps I told the wrong person, perhaps the person I told was the person who was attempting to steal the cigars following in the former genital massager’s pigeon toed footsteps. I mean, there was no investigation and since I told the manager, you would think they would actively look into who is attempting to steal from the cigar shack. It couldn’t have been a customer since we are on them like white on rice.

True- I wrote things here, but once I would write them I would move on since I had gotten it out of my system. Among the customers, Mr. Seltzer was saddened, Mr. Arbus was shocked and former co-workers Sean and Raymond were surprised. Haven’t heard from Don but I’m sure I will soon enough. Cigar shack neighbor, Mr. Partant wasn’t that surprised at all though. He’s seen them come and go.

And by the way, I was asked at last Friday’s training charade- I was asked what the Spanish word ‘Ligero’ meant, I said it meant ‘light’ and was told I was wrong. Guess who wasn’t wrong?

It was great walking down the avenue with the sun out, and with the bus waiting at the gate I was home in no time. A nice meal after work was had which was a big change from the past two years. Bill is home, proud of me, reminding me of where he works and how the guy he works for despises smoking. I don’t think I will need assistance since once again like I wrote- I did not do anything wrong. It’s not like I was working drunk or giving out Xanax, or stealing cigars etc. like Zack told me how the former genital massager had.

I am also quite happy I do not have to be at the cigar shack at 8AM tomorrow for the ‘new manager assimilation overview’ which sounds like something from the Borg. They want honesty and candor and I was more than willing to lie on Zack’s behalf, but now I don’t have to. There were a lot of things that I had done that weren’t asked of me, and somethings that were set up, will be delivered soon enough. Ah it’s not my thing anymore, I’m sure someone will figure it all out. Someday?

I can sleep in! A new day, a new beginning and already a new lead.

May 22, 2012 was not such a bad day after all.


this will probably the last of this series of this image.


1-02 That’s Him Over There

I Like- Jeremih

“Hopelessly banal with a heaping slathering of ennui”

So today has been a day off, and so far it’s been alright. Nothing special, just a lot of rain. Despite all that, I was still up and about. I needed a new hands free for my phone and finally have one that plays both on my iPod and my phone. I used to have to have to carry two different hands free ear buds, and I probably still will, using the older one as a backup. And I already have a back so now I will have two backups which is alright I reckon.

That entailed a trip to Radio Shack where I stood and looked at the wall of hands free things before deciding on one after talking with the sales associate who was crazy cute. An older chap with salt and pepper hair. No, nothing happened but it definitely added to the whole experience overall. From there it was a walk in the rain under the Wanker Banker umbrella that is perfect for stormy days like today.

And of course I talked on the new hands free with Bill who got the Staten Island Yankees national anthem gig. I am sure it’s only one game, but it brings him that much closer to singing for his beloved New York Yankees. Growing up, my family was New York Mets fans and I still support the Mets (though I usually don’t care) over the Yankees. But of course if Bill winds up singing in the Bronx at Yankee Stadium, you can bet I will be there.

I can’t say often enough how great it is to have Bill in my life. And we swear to be together forever. He still drives me crazy with the things he does, or the manner he says things (you have to be there, though he more than likely would not do it in front of anyone but me). But like I have explained to friends and family, When he starts driving me crazy, I take a step back and realize how much I would miss it if he stopped doing those things, or not around to do those things.

He’s my rock with ambitions to be a mountain.

And now I am going to do something that bores the piss out of some people. Still I hope to get some sort of discussion going on with regards to the following.

It’s the Return of the iTunes Shuffle!

Rufus Wainwright- Out of the Game
The opening track from Rufus’ latest record, Out of the Game. It is the pop record that was written about in the music papers and blogs the past few months. In fact when I was at the Hoboken Art & Music Festival earlier this month, while talking with Jane Scarpantoni, she reintroduced me to Andy Peters who played with Jane in Tiny Lights. Andy Peters is touring in Rufus Wainwright’s band now, and gives me a Six Degrees vibe. It’s a good song, close to an Elton John song from the mid-seventies and you know that can’t be bad.

The Beatles- Yellow Submarine
Darlington County Park, my parents station wagon with our neighbors the Foglios following in their car. One of my first musical memories was this song at that time and place. Still a fun song and it still makes me feel like a kid. The movie has just recently been remastered and released. Supposed to be great, but having seen it eight million times, I’ll pass though I would accept it as a gift with a smile.

Ben Gibbard/Feist- Train Song
From the still fantastic Dark Was The Night- Red Hot Organization compilation. I bought it as a lark when it came out since I have supported the Red Hot Organization through the years. I didn’t expect to like it or even LOVE IT but there you go. The Red Hot Organization does work for AIDS Charities and education and promotes Safe Sex and has been at it for over twenty years. Support them!

Budos Band- Nature’s Wrath
A great band, very funky and they remind me of Konk from back in the day. I saw Budos Band play a set at Maxwells a few years ago and they room was definitely swinging like it used to, and perhaps still does. At least it was swinging that night. I even went downstairs during the break in their set and told them how much they reminded me of Konk. They seemed to appreciate it and I thought it was cool they knew who Konk was. This song even has a flute on it and I don’t really mind even though the flute really isn’t on my list of favorite instruments. Sorry flautists that I know and love. You’re great, but I just don’t care for the flute.

Michael Jackson- Ain’t No Sunshine
From Michael’s childhood years, really a beautiful version with his adorable voice on the Bill Withers classic. It doesn’t sound like the Jackson Five singing back up so this must be from one of his early solo records. Definitely a Motown production and he is really hitting those notes. This is one of those songs that I have but never played before. A nice surprise and a nice way to fade out the way I faded in. Vocalists like Rufus Wainwright and Michael Jackson bookending this here Return of the iTunes Shuffle thing.

“I told you so.”





06 Hey You