I have been thinking of writing about these characters from 46 years ago.They were a part of my life back then, we all worked for the book company, HBJ- the warehouse in Saddle Brook NJ. 2 out of 3 were somewhat influential in my life and not necessarily in a good way.

First there was Laszlo Papp. We shared September 12 as a birthday. Laszlo was a few years older than me. My mother described him once as a good kid then came back to work wearing a Vivienne Westwood cheesecloth t-shirt, labelled ‘Destroy’ with a swastika on it. He wasn’t endorsing Nazis, just in it for the shock value.

Laszlo was a good looking guy in the Paul Simenon from the Clash mold. He would go to Manhattan on weekends and I would give him $5.00 to pick up various singles I had heard on WPIX FM. He soon got tired of doing that and suggested that I just go with him.

So with little apprehension, I joined him. That was an adventure, I was seeing parts of Manhattan that I had never been to before, mainly the Village, both the East and West Village. The record stores were in the East Village, St Mark’s Sounds and Free Being.

Laszlo had a ‘thing’ for a girl named Debbie Robinson. Laszlo lived in Elmwood Park, and Debbie lived in the next town, Saddle Brook. Debbie would join Laszlo and me on occasional trips to the Village. One time, Laszlo needed a round metal ring for his leather jacket.

The only place he could get such an item, a cock ring actually, was the Leatherman on Christopher Street in the West Village. That was my first visit to that Gay mecca. Laszlo, Debbie and I walked down West Fourth Street towards Seventh Avenue South.

As we passed a sidewalk cafe, two men stood up and started pointing at me and yelling ‘Jesus’. I quickened my pace, Laszlo and Debbie unaware, as far as I knew. As the light changed on the avenue, the two men appeared in front of me and started pinching my cheeks on my face, then running away. That was a baptism of sorts for me. Had I arrived? Am I blushing, or was it just my pinched cheeks?

Laszlo was not the only one who had designs on Debbie Robinson. Perry Dedovitch was very interested in her as well. I was friends with Laszlo and Perry in varying stages of ‘cool’. Laszlo was hip and I depended on his opinion for some things musical.

Perry played guitar and was into the Beatles. Laszlo drank and Perry smoked weed. I learned about weed from Perry. Perry was a handsome guy and I soon developed a man crush on him. Nothing sexual, I thought he was fun and cool and had a good vibe.

Perry and I drove from Lodi, NJ to Canoga Park, CA in 1991. There was a plan to move out there but for me when I realized that was what everyone did, I changed my mind. And it was not as easy as I imagined anyhow. That is a whole ’nother story.

Laszlo was always sniffing around but Debbie eventually decided Perry was more of a sure thing. One night Debbie and I were on the phone and she was asking if Perry was gay. She had made some moves, some overtures on Perry, who, to her, seemed oblivious. I never considered that Perry was gay. I knew his brother Darren was gay and we hung out once or twice. Darren swore me to secrecy about his sexuality, and I kept it to myself.

The night of Debbie’s phone call, Perry and I did what we usually did. Drive around and get high. I guess Perry enjoyed my company; why else would he hang out with me? With both of us being stoned, I asked him if he was straight. I knew it was ambiguous, and when he said he was feeling high, I said I meant sexually.

Then I told him that I was not straight in any sense of the word. That blew Perry’s mind, and an awkward trip to his home to drop him off followed. As he was getting out, I asked that even if he was bothered by my revelation, he keep it to himself.

He could not. He told Debbie, who told two friends and so on and so on, like the shampoo commercial that was popular at the time. The next time I was at the warehouse where my mother worked in the offices, I found half the people who were my friends were no longer my friends.

Bill Wrice was resolute in his friendship. Others dropped me and stared at me with disdain and disgust. Kevin Wagner, whom I have written about previously, was upset that I did not trust him enough to tell him.

All The Things She Said. A Simple Minds song featuring Robin Clark on backing vocals. I wasn’t too fond of it when it first came out but I have to say Robin’s voice drew me in, 40 years later.

Fructose on the mainstream. Just a sentence that popped into my head earlier today. It means nothing, or does it?

Right now I am participating in a LGBTQ+ zoom call from the agency that placed me. They are an earnest bunch, clearly dedicated to the agency and clearly so young. I am the old guy I guess. They’re comfortable being queer, where when I hear the word the hair on the back of my neck rose a bit. I am trying to embrace the word but the negative connotations are still in the back of my mind. Fight or flight.

They’re in a different world than the fruit stand. And speaking of which, Marcus dropped the news that he will be leaving the fruit stand. I am not sure if he knows what he’s getting into. I know the world where he is going to but he will have to find out for himself.

I will miss his passive aggressive abrasiveness. Or maybe I won’t. He is a difficult read.

The meeting ended and I applauded and threw hearts up when I felt the kids deserved it. They were earnest for sure. Now I am killing time. Not much going on. I have a few errands to do before I get home. Food, a cigar and a stop at a dispensary.

Mike is in better, not bitter spirits. I am looking forward to enjoying a cigar when I get home. Bill is still in New England. I had to get over my non vacation, not much I can do about it. I know I can take a trip somewhere by train or subway. I used to do that back in the day but those days are over 20 years ago.

I also flew through a very easy crossword during the LGBTQ+ meeting. I was on camera, the crossword was off camera and as far as I know, no one was the wiser.

Mike and I watched The Devil Wears Prada 2. It was entertaining, a mild summer comedy. It certainly picked up while Emily Blunt was on screen. Stanley Tucci was understated, and Meryl Streep nibbled on the scenery. Anne Hathaway was enjoyable. Mike did get a kick out of it since he does quote the original movie from time to time.

And speaking of time, there is a little over 30 minutes to get through. I can do it, I’ve done it before. I usually get a seat on the Path going home since I like to read but I think tonight I will stand.

Yancy called. I hadn’t heard from him in a few days. That was why he apolgized, his absence. Things puttered along nicely in hhis stead. He talked about Marcus’ moving on and that instead of having me go to the big fruit stand every two weeks, I will be staying at my more desirable fruit stand. Things are going to start getting hectic and I would be better off where I am. And he’ll be taking some time off to tend to matters familial, but that’s rather here nor there. I did wish him safe travels.

Now home, Bill is in Margaritaville and Mike, having eaten dinner, is fast asleep on the couch again, while Ted Lasso streams on the telly.