Monthly Archives: June 2006

There Ain’t Half Been Some Clever Bastards

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At wit’s end whatever that means. Pretty miserable. Work sucked big time today. Instead of politely telling Mark, the counselor that got me the Wanker Banker gig, thanks but no thanks, I said, ‘Tell Me More’. Really, that was the subject on the email. It’s a law firm in the heart of Times Square, which may be too close for Bill’s comfort. This job is at 7 Times Square, Bill works at 4 Times Square. It actually may be too close for me. Anyway I don’t have the job so that’s not really a concern.

The snobbishness of the office is appalling. So many noses in the air, granted they are busy fucking beavers, but would it hurt to throw something in the garbage can two feet away from them? Apparently it would. It’s getting annoying. I know it’s my job to help keep things tidy and neat, but man they don’t meet anyone halfway. And it’s so bad that I’m not caring anymore. That cup of coffee that was sitting on the counter for over an hour? Pour it down the drain? No, I poured it into the iced coffee.

And I fart whenever I have to, no matter where I am. The passing of gas has to happen, silent but deadly. I don’t care anymore. It took me three and a half years to feel like this at Wanker Banker, now it’s only taken a little over three months at McMann and Tate. I don’t know it could be because Felicia wasn’t in today. She has been an ally at work. We both dislike the same people basically, and with Felicia out, there was no ally.

I texted Felicia this morning to let her know that we needed milk and ask her to pick some up. It has to be organic milk. The delis and stores in our vicinity don’t carry organic milk, they carry milk milk. At the usual prices, so regular milk just won’t do. Oh they’ll drink the milk in front of them, put it in their Cap’n Crunch Peanut Butter cereal, or in their coffee, but man they grumble and moan about how horrible it is. Then they’ll put the empty container back in the fridge rather than the garbage can directly behind them.

Felicia responded that she was throwing up and will be in a little late. Turns out she wasn’t going to make it in at all. She had a seizure and had to go to the hospital. I didn’t know this until she phoned from the pharmacy were she was picking up some medication. This morning before I knew about what happened, I did my usual job of sending out an email, ‘the morning announcement’ pertaining to who’s out sick, on vacation, traveling or running late. I mentioned that Felicia was running late. As far as I knew at that time she was.

Hours later, some dingle berry asks me what was Felicia’s story, did I hear from her. I told them I didn’t and I was a bit worried. I tried calling several times and left voicemails asking if she was alright. Like I said I didn’t hear from her until after the hospital, when she was waiting for her prescription. I sent out an email stating that she was at the hospital and she’s better now. A few people came up and asked what happened and I told them that Felicia had a seizure.

They seemed concerned, after all they’ve been through this with Felicia’s cancer before. That was nice of them. Of course these were the people that Felicia and I agree are good people. None of the nasty bitches and that’s a non gender specific term bitches, asked about Felicia’s well being.

Well I got out of there as soon as I could, had an appointment with the chiropractor and wound up feeling worse than I did when I walked in there. I don’t think I’ll continue treatment with the doctor. It’s like an assembly line in the office, always someone next in line, in and out. The doctor attempts a conversation, but doesn’t listen to what your saying, just a lot of ‘Yeah, uh huh. Yeah’ If you can’t even fake carrying your end of the conversation why bother?

After leaving the chiropractor’s office feeling misshapen, I walked to the Path train, head throbbing and rather miserable. Bill came home and gave me a hug, which really helped a lot, emotionally, mentally and physically. These are the moments where it’s all worth it.

Bachelorette

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A very busy Monday. It was ok since I did not bop Bill in the nose last night. I was out cold when he came in from driving the bus to and from Atlantic City. It was a busy day yesterday what with the beach and Folsom East. I heard from an online buddy that he was there looking for me, I was there looking for him, but we must’ve passed like two ships in the night, both smoking cigars.

Slept really well and woke up doing the usual routine of breakfast, coffee, shower and out the door. It was already hot walking to the train. I didn’t stop in to see Plantain man since I had bananas left over from the bicycle ride on Saturday. I did wave to him and he waved back. No sign of the pup tent, which was sad. It could’ve been there but I didn’t see it. I guess some guys who are straight would go to stores with girls who have their high beams on, i.e. erect nipples. Me, I’ll take a pup tent.

Path was crowded with guys in suits. Very few guys wear suits with the attention to detail that I did, but then again it was/is a fetish. I occasionally see a well dressed guy that I have difficulty taking my eyes off him, I scan from the head to the toes. The square toed shoe is a turn off and I can abide rubber soled shoes only if there is inclement weather. Most of the men that dress well are older. Sometimes there’s a thirty something kind of guy who dresses to perfection but I see these other guys, who will probably wear suits for the rest of their careers looking like it’s such a chore. Granted, for me if the temperature is over 80 degrees it is a chore.

This morning was over 80 degrees and I wore shorts, a Guyabera, and tan Airwalks. All that was missing was a skateboard. That’s how casual I can dress. Felicia floated into work, not high or anything just seemed to be in good spirits. We were chatting in the pantry when I got a phone call. I answered, and it was Mark, the counselor that got me the job at Wanker Banker in 2002. I called him a few times in the past year as the shit started to hit the fan, begging him to help me get a new job. I left voice mails and emails and never got a response. Today I got a response.

Some funky law firm who prides itself on not being your average law firm is looking for someone that Mark believes is just like me. The pay is in the same range that I am making at McMann and Tate, and probably is a suit and tie job. I told Mark I’d think about it, but never got back to him. Hey, he’s a day late and a dollar short. The man in a coonskin cap wants eleven dollar bills and Mark’s only got ten.

I’ll give him a call and politely decline, thanking him for his effort. I told Felicia who it was and reassured her that I wasn’t planning on leaving, and I’m not. Things have gotten considerably better and we’ve become something that resembles a team. A team, with me as Father Confessor perhaps. Funny thing is, Harpy my old boss from back in the day called later on and Felicia was around for that call too. She seemed concerned that something was going on with me, but once again I reminded her that I told her in the interview (the one that she said I was more animated during) that I wouldn’t be leaving.

I think the reason for my being uncomfortable in the initial month was from going from one work environment to another. Before I started working at Wanker Banker I was doing temp work, no real work place, it just changed every day or every week. That made for an easy transition, going from being rootless to having an actual job. In April I went from one situation where although difficult, it was relatively easy to a job that was 180 degrees from Wanker Banker. It seems to be getting better now.

Felicia and I worked side by side, and even had lunch together while unpacking boxes and file cabinets that were shipped from the now closed San Francisco offices. I like to make her laugh. Nothing it seems is off limits and that’s fine by me.