Tuesday, didn’t sleep well the night before. I was upset with Bill, upset with myself. There really wasn’t much of a reason to be upset. Misplaced two jazzies which I blamed on Bill who was merely vacuuming. It’s one of the few things that I look forward to after work, for some it is a scotch, for some it’s their kids, for me it’s a jazz cigarette. It really should be decriminalized and made easier to get so I won’t be stressed like I was last night. Bill was apologetic, I was uptight. Not a good combo in any event.

I had some wine which soothed my jagged nerves and went to sleep earlier than usual. I was surprised I was able to sleep with that chip on my shoulder. Bill came to bed soon after and woke me up, making it difficult to go back to sleep. As I nuzzled and lay next to him I mentioned something that made him take a shower. I was able to drift back to sleep but when he came back he smelled like a candy cane factory. He’s been using some peppermint oils for his back and applied a little too much which had the effect of smelling salts on me.

I couldn’t sleep after that and wound up watching television at 1:00 in the morning. Eventually sleep called and I answered and had very strange vampire dreams. This is what happens when my beloved jazzies go a missing. Last time the dreams where on an apocalyptic level. Horrible dreams that shook me awake. So I’ll take a jazz cigarette over those dream scenarios every time. So after fighting hordes of vampires I woke up to find Bill up and about and going to work around 6:30. I wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want to spend too much time with me. I didn’t want to spend too much time with myself either.

Work was ok. I actually sat in on a management meeting, not meaning that I am part of management, but they asked for my ideas and I gave them. The mandatory suit and tie regime would’ve been shot down had I brought it up. That was a joke. Ok not a good one. But I contributed to the meeting and left not feeling stupid, but glad that I had the ear of the CEO, Heinz Hasselblad, who happens to be a nice guy that I am older than. Whee!

Tonight, I am content with a jazzie. Bill just came home and I gave him a great big hug and kiss. We’re watching Spike Lee’s documentary, ‘When the Levees Broke’, special 4 hour showing on Hurricane Katrina and the devastation of New Orleans. It all happened a year ago but I was oblivious, for Bill and I were in our own emotional maelstrom. And like New Orleans we are still working out our way out of the emotions that crashed last year. It’s a tragedy that New Orleans is still a mess a year later. Too bad the American people are tired of the story. Why aren’t they fired up about the malfeasance of this administration? What the hell is wrong with them?