It’s Monday. Terry was working this week so I afforded myself the luxury of sleeping to 6:45AM. Yes, an anarchistic way to start the day, but I was up late last night, till midnight. I am so out of control. It was great being with Bill yesterday, going to the recital, seeing Dan perform, which rekindled some ideas that Bill and I had a few years ago, and driving out to Garfield. Bill’s such a nice guy, so gregarious that he actually enjoys hanging out with my family, and they dig him too.

Next month for Thanksgiving Bill and I are going to visit my cousins down in South Jersey. That’s going to be something special for I’ve never hung out with any of them on my own, there was always a member of my immediate family in the vicinity. I’m sure they’ll like Bill too. How could they not? But will they like me? That’s the question. It was good to see my brother Frank comfortable in his teeth since he’s been in some discomfort about it for the past year. Major dental work.

Well now it’s my turn for major dental work. My teeth are fucking rotten. Sure the front ones look fine, but in the back it looks like Dresden after the war. My teeth are falling apart it seems despite my greatly reducing my sugar intake, brushing frequently and using ample amounts of mouthwash, but it’s the flossing that killed me, or rather the lack of flossing. For me, flossing is a relatively new concept, and I could never get the hang of it. I’ve tried various methods and different devices but still, every time I floss, I leave the bathroom looking like a very thin silly string party that smells vaguely like spearmint. Are bad teeth hereditary? I don’t think my mom had good teeth and I know Frank’s aren’t so good.

For a long time I had no health insurance, no dental, no eye care. Nothing. When my teeth would act up, I’d find a dentist who’d recommend a root canal, but I couldn’t afford that so I’d have the tooth pulled which left a gap and allowed the teeth the shift. I couldn’t afford the root canal and had no other option to escape the pain, for there is no pain like a tooth ache. I am sort of doing the right thing by going before I start feeling pain. I did attempt something a year ago, late spring 2005. The dentist recommended seeing a periodontist for surgery was going to be needed. She prescribed Doxycycline and one of the warnings is to avoid direct sunlight while using the medication.

Avoid the sunlight during beach season. No way, I couldn’t do it. Going to the beach whenever I can was needed for my mental health. Swimming in the sea, playing in the sun that I couldn’t avoid. I knew I’d be paying a price for that non action and now is the time to pay. So I am going back to the dentist tomorrow, tail between my legs, ready to take my lumps and to go under the scalpel. It worked for Frank so hopefully it will work for me.