Back at the major fruit stand today aka the belly of the beast. It’s not as bad as it’s been no fires as far as I can tell. Taking it slow means I’m not taking my time. And it’s a beautiful Wednesday afternoon September 9th 99 I am in the concrete Park having a small cigar.

Bill is running around somewhere he’s going to be driving tomorrow coming back on Friday or Saturday. (Like I said) Mike is in his crib. We had a good talk last night about how I don’t believe in myself or I don’t think I’m handsome. Both are correct. He tries to reassure me that I am sexy or at least when I’m smoking a cigar walking down the street. I walk like I’m black whatever that means. Can’t be too conscious about it because I won’t know how to do it correctly so I’ll do it subconsciously.

And it’s true I do not believe in myself. I never got any attitude of ‘you could do it son’ from my parents or my family; if anything it was just encouragement to get by. Which works for me up to a point I suppose but I certainly lack ambition and smoking weed took care of whatever admission was left. I was not encouraged to go to school meaning college when that time came I realized that it was not for me, being a waste of time and money.

So it worked which I enjoyed somewhat and then fell into a various crowds of college graduates and/or graduate students. Remember half a dozen graduate students from Columbia University working on a project for William Jovanovich. They seemed to like me and I seemed to like them and I don’t think they’d suffer pools gladly so as welcomed into the fold.

Don Bollinger married Michelle (McCarty) Ricciardi. I went to their wedding and reception. I don’t know how I did. I’m sure I didn’t stay for the whole thing. Michelle was nice but she turned out to be HR which I knew, but I didn’t know what HR did then. They married, they moved around the block from me in Hoboken on Jefferson Street and they moved away and they moved away from each other (I) got divorced.

Don moved to Hollywood and I’m sure he has a presence on IMDb, Michelle did her own thing and passed away a few years ago. She read a staffing agency for college graduates called red cup staffing. I found that out looking her up trying to find a job for my niece Hillary and when I saw she died I realized there was no point in it at all.She was nice and rather pretty.

And I am now working in the belly of the beast. In two days it will be September 11th, 25 years from that awful event 2001. I remember it like it was yesterday and I’m sure I’ll do something about it or write something about it when the time comes. But today not really

Crestfallen: Yancy: the extended week
Drips and (traps) drabs (but) bought a favorite cigar yesterday salesman took four bucks off I came in again tonight to get the same thing different salesman got one buck off

Bill has taken to eating my bread and he’s been good at replacing it but not this time you had all day to replace it but he’s not and he’s getting up crazy early in the morning so he’s not doing it tonight or tomorrow which means I have to be cautious with the use of bread.
I have scheduled 3 days of work this week. Federal holiday on Monday, personal time off on Friday. I thought I was in the belly of the beast for today only but Yancy mentioned that I was in the belly of the beast tomorrow as well. So that three day work week feels like a five day work week. Not really. I am being dramatic. But still…

And Bill went to go pick up his laundry. On the way to the laundromat, he went out of his way to buy bread for me.

This guy, Bill.