Monthly Archives: October 2009

So Far Around the Bend

I do legitimately worry for Obama’s safety. Perhaps there are rabid elements of the right wing that will attempt something and I certainly hope not. But watching Bill Maher tonight I was struck by a thought.

It didn’t actually hurt by the way.

Chris Matthews and Martin O’Malley both said regarding Don’t Ask Don’t Tell that Obama will overturn it in due time. And that’s what I feel as well. But the thought that struck was that perhaps subconsciously, people feel that Obama won’t live long, and want him to get things done before a tragic, horrible ending.

There’s that JFK thing too. And that guy walking into Jim Mastro’s store telling him to get a gun since the revolution will be occurring soon enough.

Or is it because we, perhaps exclusively Americans, are impatient? Everything is so fast and of the instant, that we get impatient when something that didn’t exist 20 years ago (like cellphones) doesn’t work as fast as it should.

Louis CK has a YouTube clip that’s been going around that’s about that same thing. It’s pretty funny. I’m sure it’s a stretch. Is Obama the first post-Internet President?

I wrote that last night after the initial post. I felt compelled to write that. Funnily enough, almost 24 hours later I’m not embarrassed as I am sometimes, after writing in a pique of righteousness.

Last night before Bill Maher, and before the last inning or so of the Yankee game which Bill watched, I watched Marathon Man. Hadn’t seen it in a while.

Still a good movie, Laurence Olivier is great of course. The ‘Is it safe’ scene still makes one’s skin crawl.

For me, one of the most affecting scenes occurs on 47th Street in the Diamond District of Manhattan. Christian Szell is trying to get some diamonds appraised and is spotted by two former inmates from Auschwitz.

I so wanted them to exact their revenge on ‘the white angel’ as Szell was known then. But he gets away after slicing the throat of one of the survivors.

Dustin Hoffman did an decent job pushing 40 and playing a 20 something graduate student. It’s a good movie, but not a great movie. Definitely of it’s time.

Stayed up for a while after that, finally going to bed around 1:00. Woke up as Bill was getting ready to go see his mom and his aunt. Both have Alzheimer’s and need to have someone watch them at all times.
Today was Bill’s turn.

I got out of bed soon after that, went out and bought the paper and came home to a nice breakfast. Still a gray day outside.

Around noon I walked over to Tunes and bought the first record by the Feelies, Crazy Rhythms. My friend Andy who used to do the sound at McSwells while I spun records next to him recorded and mixed 2 live tracks that are available for download.

But since I don’t have my own computer I will wait to download that stuff. It’s still a very good record. I like it more now that I did when it first came out. There are bits that were used in Susan Siedelman’s Smithereens and hearing those tracks can remind me of that very downbeat movie.

I was thinking about going to Queens to take part in the march protesting the beating and hospitalization of Jack Price. But being cold and rainy put me off, plus I am a little burnt out on the activism lately.

I’ll still get involved but I needed some ‘me’ time. I’ve been fighting the morons online for the past week or so. I’d be useless if I didn’t recharge my batteries and the past few days have been a bear for me and I don’t mean ‘bear’ in a good way.

And I’m more wolf than bear anyhow. I do hope it was a good turn out.

I did hang out with Meghan Taylor, the funniest girl alive and her daughter Ruby and their dog, Doon. A restoration of my flagging spirits.

We sat at a café here in Hoboken, the Frozen Monkey outside having coffee and sharing a brownie. Couldn’t sit inside since we had the dog.

Meghan is one of those friends who can tell something is wrong with me by just hearing it in my voice when I answered the phone. Pedro and Julio are the same. I’m fortunate to have good people like that in my life.

Ruby is always fun to be around and it was a pleasure to wander around Hoboken. I had Doon on the leash and I enjoyed running with him for a bit. Meghan said it was a boy and his dog and I guess I’m still a boy at heart, even at 47.

Stopped by the Guitar Bar where Meghan’s husband Jim Mastro was minding the store, sans uptight redneck revolutionaries. Meghan gave me a ride back towards my apartment, and I got out at Church Square Park where I got a call from Julio who of course spied me as I was walking home.

I did an about face and hung out with him and his adorable Superboy, Alexander on the swing set. The boy is simply amazing.

I didn’t see my brothers or my sister’s kids growing up the way I see Alexander and I am filled with wonder and hope for humanity when I see how he progresses through life.

My heart fills with joy when I see him, but then again I don’t have to deal with the messy stuff that Julio and Stine have to deal with.

It started to drizzle and so we headed home, Julio on Alexander’s left side and me on the right, doing the 1-2-3 lift off every couple of feet to Alexander’s obvious delight. I remember being in the middle all those years ago and was mighty glad to be part of the action with Alexander.

Though the day started and ended with gray clouds, being with good friends like Meghan and Julio and their kids definitely were the brightest spot in my life that I was sorely missing the past few days.

I Was Young When I Left Home

What a gray, gray day. And cold too. Feeling out of it most of the day. Can’t get into it, whatever it is. Slept really well though.

Had a few dreams and one in particular was me with my brother Frank walking towards the corner of Midland Avenue and Outwater Lane, and he says in the dream something about me always competing with him.

He brings up his stroke and I say in the dream, ‘Yeah but I’m not competing with you, I’m having a nervous breakdown.’

Of course, dreams usually last only a few seconds at best so out of the thousands I may have had, that is the one I remember. And it was probably one of the last dreams that I had before waking up.

Still writing on Bill’s Mac. My computer is great for playing solitaire.

My day had the usual ear worms. Today brought Endlessly Jealous by Lou Reed from the album New Sensations. My then roommate, Jimmy Lee turned me onto that album.

I also remember when I was carrying a torch for Steve Saporito, I explained that Endlessly Jealous summed up how I felt about the situation I had put us both in. That was a difficult time.

I fell for him hard but he didn’t feel the same way. He wanted to be friends, but I couldn’t reconcile with that. It was only in the past few years when I would occasionally see him that I could look him in the eye without any romantic feelings or a reasonable facsimile thereof.

I am happy that he’s doing the things that he wants to.

Another ear worm was Cry by Johnny Ray. I don’t know why that popped in, I hardly know the song. The last ear worm was the Outro to Layla by Derek & the Dominoes.

Besides being in Goodfellas, it brings back a memory of the Lodi Boys Club. They had a jukebox there and on it was the song Layla, a double sided single. The main part, with the lyrics and guitars was the A side, the B side was the outro.

I mentioned that I liked the B side more than the A side and my brother Brian told me I was a jerk for liking that side. Actually he didn’t say jerk.

Now I’m listening to Dark Was The Night, which seems to be the record I play the most so far this year. I played it all the way through on the bus ride to DC last Sunday.

I burned a copy of it for Billie as well as for other people. I wonder if they like it as much as I love it.

So cold and damp it is. Settles in the bones and all I want to do is sleep. I even made it into the city for a little while. Nothing like being around cold, gray buildings to cheer one up.

I’m writing this in the twilight of the day, the only light is the gray sky outside. Seems rather poetic, especially for such a downbeat entry. The weather matches my mood and my mood matches the weather.

Considering the weather, the atmosphere and my spirits were so much higher only a few days ago, and now it’s like Seattle. Or at least what I know of Seattle gathering from what I know about Seattle is that it rains a lot.

Maybe it’s like the weather in Ireland and England.

Ah, everything is a drag today. I know it’s not going to last. This will generally improve sooner or later.

I had an idea for a story, the opening line was concerning a knock on the door. The character asks who is it. The other side of the door says, ‘Despair.’

I couldn’t tell if that was the one who knocked on the doors name, or merely an instruction.

Then the light changed and I crossed the street.

Just had a nap for about 90 minutes. Quite nice.

Happy birthday Oscar Wilde.