Daily Archives: April 2, 2008

Release Me

Well I haven’t had one in a while but today was just one of those days. Slept a bit later than usual, still at the office only 10 minutes late. Watched Rendition last night. Not that good a movie. I wouldn’t watch it again. Couldn’t be bothered. I’m sure their hearts were in the right place when they were making it, but ultimately there was really nothing worth looking at twice. Peter Saarsgard was the best thing in it. Jake Gyllenhaal was ok. Reese Witherspoon was ok. Meryl Streep, Alan Arkin, ok ok. I wouldn’t even watch it on cable.

Went to sleep after that. Woke up, just dragged my ass out of bed and slowly got my act together. Walked out, it was in the 40 degree range, promised to be warmer and windier later in the day so I gambled and went without my winter coat. I saw plenty of other people preparing for Arctic expeditions, usually it is people who’ve immigrated from warmer climes, but today it seemed like everyone but me bundled up. I was fine, I walk at a fairly good pace which gets my internal engine going nicely. Felt good, bracing winds at my back as I walked towards Grand Central.

There is a weird atmosphere in the office, Moe is not really gone. He’ll come in from time to time, but not really an employee anymore. No official announcement, just hearsay. I had to corner Vivek to get that info. Things are picking up a bit for me work wise. Trying to rent out office space, but no one is spending money on anything these days, and we’re asking for $3000 for a 10′ x 14′ office space, which can also be a drawback Other ads offer whole floors of office space for a little bit more than we’re asking.

At some point today, my self esteem crashed and I wondered if I was a bad person. There was no one to ask really. Bill has his own things going on so I sat with my existential dilemma which actually started a few nights ago as I lay in bed wondering what it was that people saw, when they saw me. That didn’t keep me awake at night, but did crack the door open allowing self doubt to creep in. Still, I got through it somehow. I know I’m not a bad person, but sometimes when I think of things I had done in my past, I really feel horrible. Case in point, I felt bad writing what I wrote yesterday about whats her name. I’ve decided to do my best to drop that burning coal and leave it alone. Move on, as it were.

Jay Leno apologized for what he said. I guess Jeff Whitty got his point across and I was glad to be able to help and show my displeasure towards Jay Leno. I should have done it long ago. If Jay Leno said his favorite color was green, I would have done the same photo anyhow.

Tonight, I decided to treat myself to a couple of slices of pizza. I don’t eat it as much as I used to so I went into a joint run by Albanians, posing as Italians, posing as Sodomites. Sorry, but I couldn’t resist the Marquess of Queensbury aside. 2 slices for $6.00. I balked and spun on my heel and walked out to the sound of the counterman snotty and wishing me a good night. I could get 2 small pies for $10.00. A slice of pizza is cheaper in Manhattan. I guess since the pizzeria is close to Steven’s Tech, and all those kids have some disposable income, they can get away with those prices. So that’s it for today. I’m a good person with a lot on my mind. Grumble grumble.

Raybeats- Jack The Ripper