Tag Archives: Bill

Everything Is Broken

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Thursday evening and all is well. Last night things had gotten better by the time I had gotten home, Bill on the couch watching Scrubs, me tired. My nose was a bit out of joint though. I called Bill in the middle of my existential morass, but he was on his headset at work and I hate it when he’s wearing that thing.

The microphone is too far away from his mouth and leaves him sounding disjointed which frustrated me more than anything. I can’t fault him as he was being supportive, but I did get my point across about how all I needed was a hug. I didn’t get the hug when I walked through the door. I sometimes fly up from where I’m sitting when he comes home and help him get his backpack off, hug him, kiss him, take off his hat, make sure he’s ok and let him know he’s safe and sound at home.

I guess it was too much to ask for something similar when I came home. I could have used it. No, Scrubs was on and he was comfortable sitting there in his underwear. Not much was spoken. I was probably looking like my father. All that was missing was my mother walking through the door 30 seconds before me saying ‘watch out!’.

I did eventually get the hug I needed, though I was sitting down while he was getting ready for bed. It was nice, but like I said- I needed it a lot more earlier. These are the ups and downs of a relationship. I did make a point to go into the bedroom a little while later and gave him a kiss and let him know that I love him. He said that he knew that already.

I watched Michaelangelo Signorile on his website, The Gist. Signorile is a gay activist from back in the day and now has a radio show on Sirius. He had Bill Donahue from the dreaded Catholic League on. It was interesting to watch and listen to.

Donahue always barks loudly when he sees something he considers Catholic bashing, feeling it’s unjustified, because in his world, the Catholic church can do no wrong. Lately Donahue is trying to get Andy Towle (of the excellent blog Towleroad) expelled from reporting on the Democratic Convention.

Fittingly enough after that I watched a dvd called Deliver Us From Evil all about a priest named Oliver O’Grady who went from parish to parish raping children for quite a number of years. Of course the diocese did it’s very best to keep the police out of the matter, accusing the children of perhaps leading the priest on, or even making up stories.

Yes, children do that often, telling stories about an older man inserting his penis in a vagina or mouth or rectum. Harrowing is not the word that could be used, heartbreaking is more apt. And heartbreaking not because of the church doing such things, but the families of the raped are torn asunder with their faiths shattered by these beasts in fancy frocks protecting their billions of dollars.

In particular, one family, the father converted to Catholicism to please his Irish born wife’s family. He bought into the whole schmear of the church, having Father O’Grady stay with his family and even sleeping in the daughter’s bedroom, not knowing that the daughter was being penetrated. He believes in no god anymore. A truly horrible story.

The church just lied and lied and lied affecting perhaps hundreds of families because of this priest from hell.

The father of the victim is the one in the documentary who states that his 5 year old daughter wasn’t molested, she was raped by this beast. Father O’Grady eventually did prison time and was deported back to his homeland, Ireland where he still receives a pension from the church and is seen hanging around playgrounds.

The family that I’ve mentioned made a trip to Rome to see the former Nazi pope to present a letter but of course, they could not get an audience.

Ratzberger was probably trying out some new ermine furs or Prada shoes.

Dirty filthy fuckers.

Strange Overtones

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It’s Tuesday again. It was like this last week and the week before that and it goes on further and further from here. Last night was Monday night, Bill and I watched Keith Olbermann who had some righteous indignation towards John McCrazy. Bill got very much into it, not going ghetto but politicized in a way. Then some Olympics then he was off to bed.

I’ve been playing DJ during the commercial breaks, going from roots reggae to the Stones to The Coasters to who knows where, finishing up with Les Paul and Mary Ford singing How High The Moon. Still sounds amazing over 50 years later, miles away from Mahwah where I believe Les Paul still resides.

Right now my computer is pissing me off. Very slow. I’ve been trying to burn some cd’s for Annemarie’s birthday but it’s been impossible. Keep getting some stupid code error. Pisses me off. Had to resort to plan B. Oh I am getting upset.

Presently running some spyware which is doing what it’s supposed to do I hope. More than anything the inability to burn cd’s is definitely pissing me off. I will have to work on that and send Annemarie the cd’s at a later date.

It’s a nice night for sure. Bill called to tell me that Rachel Maddow is getting her own show following Keith Olbermann. I’d like to think that the head of programming reads my blog but I doubt it.

Still no Casey in the morning. Maybe I’ve been leaving earlier, or he’s leaving later or on vacation. I remembered to bring something to read and of course, it’s Alan Bennett. Two short stories, The Clothes They Stood Up In and The Lady In The Van. The first story is funny, in a subtle English. I chuckled a few times reading it on the way in.

So far, a married couple have come back from seeing Cosi Fan Tutti and find their home has been burglarized with everything gone. Furniture, beds, phone, stove, every thing. The husband is a solicitor and the wife is a house wife.

They’ve lived a very sheltered life. No kids, no neighbors, no friends really. And they don’t interact with anyone in their town, in fact when he goes to use a pay phone at the laundromat, it was the first time he had ever been to one.

Of course there’s a lot more than that and I do Alan Bennett no justice in trying to describe his writing. So I’ll stop there. My copy is from Ramsey courtesy of the BBCLS, the cooperative system that Hoboken is a part of.

I am taking Juan to Girl Talk for his birthday in November. That promises to be a real good time. And next month is My Bloody Valentine as well as the B-52’s playing a free show by Kean University in Union, NJ September 6..

Here’s a thought I felt I should write down last night. Some straight people don’t want gay people around kids. The ‘official’ line is the skewed pedophilia fear, despite the fact that most reported pedophiles are straight men.

But perhaps on a deeper, unconscious level it’s fear of gaydar. The unspoken knowing that someone else is gay. It’s there, I have it. It’s defective but it works. Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

I think that some straight people are afraid of the gaydar coming from a child and picking up the vibe that that certain adult is different from what the child has come into contact with, and might identify more with the gay person rather than the straight people they might have been accustomed to.

What do you think of that? Comments please.