Category Archives: moldies but moodies

I’ve Found Someone

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Another day. This one was a bear. And not the heavy set hirsute gay male kind. No this was a bear, and difficult to bear. Nothing bad mind you but just a bit of a funk. And my co-workers seemed to be feeling quite the same way.

It wasn’t so bad, since I slept well while Bill was doing his best Ralph Kramden imitation in Atlantic City. I was the dutiful Alice at home.

I made coffee and actually went to the supermarket to get cereal which I had run out of and since it was on sale I was able to get 2 boxes for $3.00 which is a deal indeed. Then picking up some of my dry cleaning before heading home for a breakfast of cereal and coffee, in tandem, not together.

Out of a desire not to watch First Look NY on TV I went out and caught the bus. A nicely paced walk up Ninth Avenue, buying some organic cookies which I shared with some of my co-workers. But I saved most of the cookies for myself instead of giving them all away like I’ve been doing.

It was a beautiful day outside once again. A Spring/Autumn like day, sun shining, a nice cool breeze. Lot’s of people out of town and a lot of people from out of town took their place. The area was really not too crowded, at least inside.

Perhaps there were a lot of bedbugs as an infestation has been reported nearby.

It was certainly slow at the cigar shop. The usual playful bitchiness was going on between myself, Raymond, Don Birch & Sean. By this time Bill had made it home and was sleeping the sleep of bus drivers.

I went out for lunch and had a nice phone chat with Annemarie telling me the latest tales of the Humboldt County scene. After the phone call with Annemarie I sat on a bench near the park and read Pop: The Genius of Andy Warhol which I had ordered through the BCCLS system.

I had to return the Leo Castelli biography (just as he had gotten to Manhattan after World War II) since it was due back on Monday and not renewable. Andy Warhol is a fun read and yet it has nothing that I hadn’t read before. Just the same sentences & names in a different order.

Made it back to the shop where headaches both real and imagined ensued. Nothing insurmountable but it did include one instance of me telling Raymond that I resented him for something that he had said. A misunderstanding on his part but a misunderstanding that got under my skin and laid eggs.

It took a while for things to clear up and I had to put him in his place. Like I wrote, the day was a bear and this was the most bearish part. I don’t feel like writing about it in detail but I will say I was right and Raymond was wrong.

There was a sweet moment in the day. A woman came into the cigar shop, en route to a party. She was an attractive woman and needed to buy some cigars for a birthday present for a friend of hers. I made a recommendation and she went for it.

I offered to wrap the gift and we chatted. She was single and tired of looking for Mr. Right. I told her to stop looking and she said that she had. I suggested that she consciously stop looking and he might appear. She looked pretty good, in a nice dress as I told her of the civil union Bill and I had a few months ago and the celebration last month.

She enjoyed the story and really enjoyed me telling her that she was wearing a really nice dress (and she was). I also told her my old adage that straight men will undress a woman with their eyes, whereas a gay man will dress them with their eyes.

She laughed as I finished wrapping her gift and I wished her a good night and a happy birthday since she was turning 40 in 4 days. I also told her this could be her year. I think I helped make her night that much better and I really enjoyed doing so.

Now I am home, writing this. I have a day off tomorrow and then 5 days of work. I won’t be writing tomorrow unless there is something extraordinary to write about, and I certainly hope there won’t be.

It’s my day off goddammit.

For Christ Sake

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A rainy day and I’m not bitter. I was bitter yesterday and a tad resentful but time heals most wounds and I’m feeling alright. Definitely did not go out and play guitar today, and definitely did not respond to any acting/singing/monologue improvisation suggestions.

Today with the weather and the melatonin, made for getting out of bed quite difficult. I remember Bill leaning over me, kissing me goodbye and telling me how good I looked and then back to sleep, eventually waking up to the sounds of the Electric Light Orchestra singing Telephone Line.

That brought me back to 1976, being in a car with a kid, Paul Gaulvin, who lived a block or so away from me in Rochelle Park. I didn’t know Paul Gaulvin at all and was sort of forced into being his friend by my father who worked with Paul’s father in some capacity.

Paul’s mother was driving us somewhere when Telephone Line came on the radio. The mother was the boss of that household, the father your basic milquetoast. I believe there was an older sister in Paul’s life and they fit the nuclear template quite well, Paul and his sister fighting like cats and dogs.

Ultimately Paul and I never had much in common. We experimented with cigarettes when we were 14 years old and I remember Paul buying a pack of Camels saying that they were good because they had hashish in them.

Though Paul and I went to the same high school, we really didn’t hang out with each other, he was in a smarter class and I wasn’t. I also remember the last time I hung out with Paul, at his graduation party 29 years ago, where I got so drunk that I fell flat on my back.

There I was talking to someone and next thing I knew, I was looking up at the sky. Paul’s mother made sure I got home safely, having Paul and maybe someone else walk me home over the Route 80 overpass. Last night Bill came home just in time to catch the 11:00 news.

He asked me if I had heard from my brother Frank and I said I hadn’t. I fell into the old family trap of ‘I’m always calling him. Why should I call again?’ That in turn prompted a discussion of my family, how things were different for Frank being the oldest and me being the youngest.

Basically, by the time I came of age my parents were tired of raising kids and I was left pretty much to myself. Of course I was also living a double life, a life that my family still doesn’t know about. And that’s probably how it should be.

Somethings are better off unknown.

I do recall telling Frank about some aspect of my growing up and living a secret life and that flipped him out quite a bit. That was then, this is now and I live a quiet life, content to stay at home and watch TV.

And tonight I will be watching the penultimate episode of Lost which will hopefully be an improvement on last week’s episode.

In the hallway

In the hallway


in the rain

in the rain