Author Archives: johnozed

About johnozed

I'm 50+ years old, 210-ish#, 6'2", reddish blonde, blue eyes with glasses (and without) masculine, funny, relatively intelligent, enjoy the company of assorted friends and family especially sordid friends and family. I love music, reading, writing, conversing, laughing, going to films, shows, concerts and smoking cigars. And I also enjoy looking nice in a suit and tie. Looking more like Lewis Lapham than Tom Wolfe. I'm sure there is more, but we'll just have to find out when I write about it. In a lifetime relationship with partner Bill Vila.

B Movie

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This might be the first entry that I’ve written before noon. It’s a little after 10:00 Sunday morning. I just got back from getting bagels and the papers. I get a call from Bill as I walk back to the apartment. He’s on a bus with his mother going to church, I’m on the street.

We’re talking about various trivial things, when Bill mentions that he went to see Slumdog Millionaire with his old friend, Fred. Bill’s known Fred for almost 20 years he says.

And as from what I wrote yesterday, I wanted to see Slumdog Millionaire. It’s not so much that Bill saw Slumdog Millionaire with Fred, it’s more that I have to be content with 5 minutes a day with Bill if I’m lucky.

I have to be content with Bill running off trying to further his acting career. Going to readings and practices, rehearsals and auditions while I sit at home hoping that he gets home safely, and by home I mean Stuyvesant Town. I support Bill in these endeavors, but just wish we could spend more time together.

The phone call on the street ended rather abruptly and I sent him a text saying that “I’m hurt and pissed”. His reaction? He called me, ‘Well you saw the Wrestler at Pedro’s house and I wanted to see that with you’. I explained that it was at a party and there were other people involved.

‘Well you could have said that you didn’t want to see that. You could have asked for another movie’ I explained again there were other people there and it wouldn’t be right for me to say, ‘Hey I want to see this with my partner, perhaps we could watch another movie?’

That night in Otisville we watched a boxing match, Gran Torino and The Wrestler. You could tell by the testosterone in those viewing choices that a romantic plea would not have gone down well. I did tell him when I got back that I would like to watch it with him but no plans were ever made.

‘Well you do things on your own. You go to art galleries on your own.’ I tell him I go to art galleries on my own because he’s rehearsing with his band, or has voice classes or whatever he does on Saturday afternoons that I am not privy to. And I would rather go to the galleries with someone.

I was surprised that he was upset with me because I was pissed off. He also told me he went to see The Wrestler on his own anyway. I do not like going to movies by myself. In his mind I think he feels I should be happy to be able to see him when I see him for those fleeting minutes.

And in those fleeting minutes, when I am on my way home, bundled up for the winter weather, he comes out in office wear, no coat, maybe a hat which when he goes out to see me is not enough to guard against the cold weather. So I only get a few minutes.

We don’t make the time to do anything together anymore. He has his things to do, sometimes for his career, sometimes just for a lark and I hear about it the next day. He seems to think that I want to monopolize his time and I certainly do not.

I just want to find time that might last for a few hours rather than a grouping of seconds. To his credit, he did offer to see Slumdog Millionaire with me but I told him no, that it was tainted. Plus to see movies nominated for an Academy Award is fun for me at least, but after the fact it sort of loses it’s cache.

I suppose I could wait for it to come on cable, but who knows? I’m not interested anymore really.

It’s not about the movie, it’s about the time spent.

Tell Me What You See

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This has been an odd day. Nothing bad happened, at least not yet. It just started out on the wrong foot, leading to a day of missteps. I woke up, tried to contact Julio to see if he and Stine wanted bagels. No answer. I called Stine instead and she said no, they were going out. That was no problem.

I went to the bagel shop where there is never a line anymore. It used to be there would be a line out of the store onto the sidewalk, but hasn’t been like that in a few months.

I asked Jeff, someone who’s been working there for ages, a week or so ago if it’s been slow and he mentioned that I had just missed a rush. I didn’t believe that since there is hardly anyone in there when I’m there. Denial or just putting forth the company line?

I’m convinced they don’t like me in the Bagel store. One guy in particular doesn’t like me, I can tell. When I moved back to Hoboken almost 7 years ago, I started getting my bagels on Washington Street. A few weeks later I saw this particular guy on the street with his kids and as I passed I said hello. He gave me the stink eye in return. I figured with the hundreds of people he sees each week I was lost in the shuffle.

After that I saw him again and once again said hello and once again I get the stink eye. One time I gave my order at the counter, something like 3 sesame, and 2 poppy bagels. He gave me 3 and 3. I mentioned that it wasn’t what I ordered and he got all uppity. So ever since then it’s quite frosty between us.

I do try to support small businesses, but in Hoboken, the small business owners don’t make it easy and show very little gratitude. Next to the register is a container for tips. Knowing that some of the staff have families to support I sometimes leave my change in the container. Sometimes I get thanked, and other times like today with me and Frosty the bagel counter person I get nothing.

I think next time I go in I will wait for Frosty to be waiting on another customer. And if I hear Jeff say to a new customer, ‘You know those bagels will make you thirsty, you sure you don’t want something to drink with that?’ I’ll go postal.

That basically set the tone for the day. I went out once after that and it just seemed so weird that I decided not to go out again until tomorrow. But I did go out, hoping to run into the Chinese dude who usually sells bootleg DVD’s at the barber shop at 4:00PM on Saturday afternoons.

I didn’t see him and I wasn’t going to go hang out in a barber shop if I wasn’t getting a haircut. I was hoping to get a $5.00 DVD of Slumdog Millionaire. Oh well. The only Academy Awards movies that I’ve seen are Milk and The Visitor, and Wall-E.

Maybe I’ll do a live blog during the awards tomorrow, or rather write about it as it happens and post afterwards. That seems more likely since I don’t think I’m equipped for live blogging.

Last night I caught up on what I had DVR’d. Spectacle with Elvis Costello. 1st up had guests She and Him, Jenny Lewis and Jacob Dylan. All very good and enjoyable and that Jacob Dylan sure is cute, and he sounds like Bruce Springsteen I think. Imagine growing up being Bob Dylan’s kid, how strange that must be.

I have a newfound love for Jenny Lewis, though Juan has been hyping her up to me for a while now. And She and Him, Zooey Deschanel and M. Ward were good enough to make me think about getting their record.

Then I watched what I guess is the season finale for Spectacle, this time hosted by Elton John who interviewed Diana Krall and had her husband, Elvis Costello come out opening with a song and singing with Diana and Elton at the end.

Geez, I swear Diana Krall is like so many women that I know, at least in the way she talks and her mannerisms. I enjoyed her, but sometimes it was like watching my niece Corinne on TV. If only Corinne played piano. She was very entertaining, Diana Krall and I think she’d be worth checking out as well.

After that I watched the 11:30 Simpsons who had Stephen Sondheim on, writing a song for Krusty the clown. And Bart was in therapy and really getting a lot out of it, even though 5 sessions were mandatory as punishment for a school prank.

I almost stayed up to watch Conan O’Brien’s last Late Night show but since I was recording it I figured I would watch it today. Which I did do, watch it today. Unfortunately it ran long and as Conan was summing up his 16 years hosting the show it got cut off.

So I watched that on NBC.com, and posted it on my Facebook page, as well as Conan releasing Abe Vigoda back into the wild, since ‘Pa’ said he wouldn’t be able to take him to Los Angeles where he will host the Tonight Show.

Though I didn’t watch Conan that often since it was on past my bedtime, I will miss him. But I should be able to catch some of the Tonight Show with Conan . I’m 6’2” and wear a size 12, Conan is 6’4” and probably wears a larger shoe, and I can only hope Jimmy Fallon could fill those shoes.