Mind is racing a hundred miles an hour. Perhaps scientifically it’s more than that. Once again I underachieve. Work is of course nuts. Hasn’t gotten any better since Bleedin’ Hope’s departure. I wasn’t sure if she jumped or was she pushed, but odds are she jumped.

Interesting occurrences lately.

Bill was over the other night, and asked me how my day was. I tell him basically, “Zelzoyh this, Zelzoyh that…” He asks me her last name, I say “Schaffer” He starts yelling like he is known to do when he gets overly excited. He goes off on the fact that she worked with him at the law firm.

‘Oh my GOD! You work with Zelzoy Schaffer? Oh my GOD!” “Oh, you know her?” I ask. “She used to work with me at the law firm! I worked with her once and that was all I needed to know that this bitch was nuts!” He goes on and on about how her desk was so organized like a Feng Sui doing a Feng Sui.

“And she had the attitude like she was above us all.” “Like a real princess eh? Like her shit didn’t smell?” “YES!” Bill springs into action, and starts calling some of his girlfriends that he works with, mostly leaving voice mails. Within minutes one of them calls back.

Bill sits on the couch. “Hey, Marcia. Yeah. D’you remember that chick that used to work on 48? Name started with a Z?” I can hear static voice on the other end. “Does the name Zelzoy sound familiar? It does? Well guess what…?”

Bill starts to tell Marcia about where she is now, and who she is bothering now. “Yeah. She works with my partner, John at an Investment Bank. She’s pulling the same shit all over again.”

Turns out Zelzoy worked on Bill’s floor and forced another legal secretary out due to some power struggle. I tell you the woman is nuts. There is a pattern here and I’m sure the scissors are heading down towards my dotted lines.

I decide to get some info on her and drop a name at work the next day. I tell my friend Brenda who is nestled in the nest of vipers’ known as administrative assistants, “I’m having drinks after work with Diane Long from the law firm after work. Wanna come?” I say winking.

Brenda, playing along, plays ambivalent. “I’ll let you know.”,she says as I turn and walk away. Apparently when I walked away, Zelzoy lost her cool. Lost her cool enough to claim that I’m harassing her. Really lost her cool enough to call the “law firm” and speak with someone who claims, “you are such a good worker Zelzoy. We’d be happy to have you back.” On the speaker phone for most everyone to hear. All because I mention the name of someone she used to work with and who didn’t like her.

Harassment? For saying I’m having drinks with someone after work? Pish posh I say.
She is quite insane. The thing that really gets me is the fact that I’ve been working at this firm for over three years. She hasn’t been there three months and she has the office caught in her power struggle with me.

The really strange thing is I wasn’t in a power struggle. It started with me commenting on the fact that she never says Hello. That set her off calling me unprofessional. Then everything started being stacked against me.

I didn’t make any rude jokes. I didn’t show any rude photos. No email jokes at all. She lied to the wombus and bleedin Hope and they started stacking. I spoke with John McGruff the president of the company about her and he did have a meeting with her, but since then it has gotten quite worse.

Man I am so sick about writing about these people. They are getting depressing. I can only imagine how you feel. No really, I can only imagine.