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I Found Out

Friday, December 23rd, 2011

s sama m14 si suarez en zara en g. That is what my smartphone microphone interprets what I say. Quite strange, I think it is having a stroke. It’s been a long day following a night of very little sleep. I could not shut my brain off and all I could do was think about the cigar shack. Most disturbing. I reckon I got about two hours of sleep.

And of course since Zack made a request that I certainly could not turn down, I had to be in the cigar shack and hour earlier than usual. And there is the fact that I have to open the cigar shack tomorrow. Bad planning once again. Today has been hectic though of course the numbers are quite good. Zack should be happy as well as the corporate overlords hidden somewhere in the Alps.

Now there are 12 minutes left, Jerry Vale is lurking about. I haven’t spoken to Jerry Vale in weeks, at least not personally since he had that meltdown about having to wait outside the cigar shack in relative comfort as I was making my way in 30 degree weather. I guess he doesn’t care that we don’t speak.

All I was hoping for was an apology but since it’s not forth coming I will just treat him like Marie Natale, a hobbit like creature from my old neighborhood, who would always keep your Spaulding if it went over the fence and landed in her yard. Right now I am not even sure if I will post this tonight since I am so tired and still have things to do, like get some more prints from CVS.

I should have used the CVS in Hoboken since the digital pics I sent this morning were ready this afternoon. Well I am home now. After lucking out and catching the 10:22 bus (they were late, in my favor) I was able to take the bus to the penultimate stop and go to CVS and pick up the photo prints I sent off this morning. If only I had done that on December 15. But that was then and now is here.

I closed the cigar shack with Jerry Vale and we had a little talk which cleared the air. He claims he wasn’t yelling at me that day, but rather yelling at Bradley. I just happened to be collateral damage I guess. These eleven hour shifts are killing everyone’s morale. Tonight was the last of the eleven hour shifts and tomorrow working an eight hour shift will seem like a half day.

Jerry Vale did apologize several times even though one time was all that was needed. We even hugged and he told me something quite nice, that I am special and well regarded by a lot of people. It was awfully nice to hear.

This afternoon when I went to the fast food joint to get some dinner, an elderly woman was on line, allowing people to go past her since she hadn’t made up her mind. As I passed her I told her that if she decided what she wanted she could go ahead of me. She hadn’t and I proceeded to the register.

She came up right behind me, and when she wasn’t looking I told the guy behind the counter that I would pay for her food. When the time came for her to pay, the guy told her that I had taken care of it. She was so happy and couldn’t thank me enough.

It wasn’t much money wise but apparently I made her holiday. She praised me for being such a handsome gentleman and all I could do was blush while holding back some tears. I was quite happy to do something nice like that, and for a moment the I felt in tune with the holiday spirit. It actually got me through the rest of the night. Well that and finally talking to Jerry Vale.

Not sure if I am writing tomorrow. It’s a holiday and there is a lot of running around scheduled. I hope you and yours have a happy and healthy holiday.





06 Tel Ol’ Bill [Alternate Version] 1

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I Feel Free

Monday, December 5th, 2011

Well after quite a very long day I am glad to be home. Yesterday I was glad to be home too. I spent most of the day indoors not doing much, but I did go out on a few occasions. A trip to the bibliothèque which left me empty handed, a grocery store visit and a brief walk around Washington Street before I realized I had enough and did not want to do anymore.

Luckily for me I fell into a new habit and watched the marathon of Harry Potter on the ABC Family channel. It was on all day and I watched a good part of it, taking a break only when I napped. My husband Bill had woken up while I was on the phone with Annemarie and while I was distracted he turned on ‘Boss’- the new show on Showtime starring Kelsey Grammer.

Bill likes the show and I haven’t watched it. Since Kelsey Grammer is a such a right wing fanatic I have no need to watch him. He probably supports Rick Perry or Michelle Bachmann like most shitheads. Still if Bill were to insist that it’s a good show and to watch it with him, I would. But I strongly doubt I would watch it on my own.

I napped while Bill watched and awoke as Bill was heading out to do some work in his office as well as rehearse with his music combo. I got up and made some dinner and farted around while Harry, Ron & Hermione prepared for battle with he who must not be named.

Bill came home while the Half Blood Prince was going on, seeing Severis Snape and recognizing a bad guy, though he hasn’t seen all the movies so things have yet to be revealed. He did not stay awake for the whole thing but I did of course. Then after that I watched Boardwalk Empire and turned into bed.

I think I slept relatively well, waking up at 6:30 with my husband Bill kissing me goodbye. I knew it was 6:30 because I asked him. He split and I carried on sleeping. I was closing the cigar shack so I was going in late. I arranged it so Thomas and Bradley could leave at decent hours and I have something that would resemble a steady schedule this week.

I lay sleeping, thinking of the Beatles, specifically George Harrison when the radio came on, My Sweet Lord was playing. I took that as a good sign and got out of bed, dragged a comb across my head. Puttering about I was out on the street two hours later waiting for the bus. My second favorite bus driver was behind the wheel. If you have to ask who my favorite bus driver is, then you should really think about it, maybe read some previous entries.

The bus was relatively empty and a fast ride to the bus terminal. A long wait for the subway but still once I got where I needed to be I was still about a half hour early. Bradley and Thomas and me, Zack out at an off site meeting somewhere. It was busy enough and my lunch, (which was actually dinner) was around 6:00.

The day couldn’t end soon enough though but it did. For a twist I rode home on the bus with Deborah the downstairs neighbor. She’s a sweetheart as well. A fun ride with a chat filled with laughter. I came home and there was Bill, hooking up the music- Outstanding by the Gap band.

Jeez I love my husband Bill. He’s the greatest and I am forever his, as he is mine.

“Art is not for everyone.” – John Cale




03 – Style it Takes

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I Don’t Want to Know

Saturday, November 12th, 2011

Another Saturday night in the cigar shack. It has been a long day, working alongside Thomas and Frank Burns nee Bradley. Bradley reverted back to Frank Burns today, more than likely because he was hung over. I wasn’t hungover since I really do not drink anymore, but I did not sleep so well.

Too many thoughts coming into my head as I tried to sleep and the majority of the thoughts were regarding the cigar shack. Zack’s girlfriend got a haircut and he told me about it so I thought about that for way too long. And then Bill was up and out at around 2:45 this morning so I wasn’t sleeping too much as he kissed me goodbye, in fact I was awake enough to tell him to be careful.

Tonight will be a melatonin night that’s for sure. I woke up before the alarm clock though I don’t think ‘woke up’ is the proper phrase since I didn’t feel like I was sleeping anyhow. I got myself together and headed to the bus stop, catching an earlier bus so I could get my egg sandwich.

Then a walk up to the cigar shack where Frank Burns was holding down the fort. I sat in the office and was about to take a bite when all of a sudden it got fairly busy. I put down the sandwich and helped a customer even before I punched in.

Once I made sure they were relatively happy with their purchase and Frank Burns was secure enough in his insecurities I was able to eat the sandwich and then finally punch in. Thomas was in soon enough and it made for an uneasy day.

Nothing bad between Thomas and myself but both of us are ill at ease with Frank Burns most of the time. Frank Burns does like to play the role of little Hitler when Zack isn’t around. And he was at his most alter kocker today. Whatever good feeling he presented the other night had dissipated but that was more than likely from the hangover.

Had a few phone chats with Bill as well as sister Annemarie and Bobby Risotto. Good talks all around, some food for thought. Now less than an hour to go at the cigar shack and of course it is bound to drag.

Thomas was supposed to close but since getting back to Coney Island is going to be a nightmare, he asked if I could close and I said sure. In return he gave me three of his cigars from his stash which was awfully kind and though he did not have to do it, I gladly accepted.

The area around the cigar shack has slowed considerably which will add to the crawling of time. I myself should be home by 10:00 if all goes well, Bill expects to be home by 11:00. We both have off tomorrow which seems to get rarer and rarer these days. Must do something about it.

And now I am home a few hours later than I should. I closed the cigar shack and walked down to the subway. Lucky me, the downtown train pulls in as I descend onto the platform. I think that everything is going well, and take a seat. I get to the bus terminal and climb the escalators and approaching the gate where I catch my bus and see a very long line. I decide I don’t want to wait, that I would rather be in motion so I go and head down the escalators and start walking to the Path train.

Lot’s of young couples enjoying the end of sabbath as I walk down Broadway to the Path train. I get downstairs to the Path and see that it’s very crowded down there. No one knows whats going on and then the police move everyone out after putting police tape over the turnstiles. Strange but no one did anything about the 30 people on the Path platform, beyond the police tapes.

I make my way to the bus terminal where the lines for both Jersey City and Hoboken have merged into one and is now stretched towards the bowling alley. Some NJ Transit personnel separates Hoboken from Jersey City and I am that much closer to the gate, about 50 yards away.

I then notice that the people way ahead of me on line are turning around and heading to the third level of the bus terminal. I figured out that they were going to the ‘after 10PM gate’. They start to run and I do too, following a guy up the staircase, avoiding the crowds running to the escalators.

Me and the guy make it and we are now like 20th in line. The PA blares that Hoboken bus 126 will be at gate 325 (usually 323). We’re all happy, hundreds of us, or at least the ones I can see. Then the information guy says Hoboken 126 bus is at gate 204.

We wonder whats going on and then it is announced again that Hoboken bus 126 will be at gate 204. We panic and run, I head to the staircase again, most everyone else goes to the escalators.

It was sort of like Jurassic Park meets It’s A Mad Mad Mad Mad World. But now I am home after all that and I am tired of writing. Good night. No post tomorrow.







Green Manalishi

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I Don’t Think I Trust You Anymore

Saturday, October 22nd, 2011

Well here I am again after a long day at work. It wasn’t so bad though. I did great, connected with quite a few new customers and I was really very funny. I got a lot of laughs. It started out OK as well. I was up before Bill, got myself together with a shower and some coffee and cereal. Bill was up and quite active, he doesn’t need coffee whereas I need a daily infusion.

It’s a balance and we manage quite nicely. Bill was out of the apartment a few minutes before me, a long day for him stage managing. I was out a little while later, waiting for my bus. Using latitude I could see Bill caught an earlier bus and was on 14th Street while I waited at 5th & Washington Street.

Eventually my bus arrived and I settled into a seat. A few stops away about 20 girls from Stevens Tech got on board, the first trip into Manhattan for a few of them. They chatted nervously as the bus rolled along, becoming standing room only before it usually does. And of course with all the nervous young women from Stevens Tech it took a while for them to get off the bus and then stand around waiting for their chaperone to take a proper head count.

They went one way and of course I went another. I walked up the avenue, stopping to get my egg sandwich before heading to the cigar shack. The shack wasn’t too busy, Frank Burns behind the counter. I settled into a quiet spot to eat my egg sandwich before signing in when I saw Frank Burns inundated with customers.

I stepped in and relieved some of the pressure before signing in, yet getting credit for the sales. Pressure off, I went back to the sandwich, then I finally punched in. Jerry Vale made it in a half hour later and the day started accordingly. A new set of drawers came in which needed to replace the old set. Zack told me about it the night before and I set about emptying the old drawers and moving it out.

Then I did the bank run and came back to see that Frank Burns and Jerry Vale moved the new drawers into the man cave. The old drawers were still usable so we kept it to the side instead of throwing it out. I was playing music in the shack with my iPod and a song came on, making Jerry Vale to think it was Delaney and Bonnie.

It wasn’t. It was Joe Tex. That prompted Jerry Vale and I to have a discussion about Delaney and Bonnie. Jerry Vale said that Bonnie was dead. I said she wasn’t. He insisted. I looked it up and saw I was right. I then told Jerry Vale that Bonnie Bramlett was alive, Delaney Bramlett- not so much. Jerry Vale insisted that Bonnie had died a few months ago and that the Wikipedia entry was not updated (as if).

He seemed annoyed and I went to lunch. I had a nice chat with Annemarie for a few minutes as I sat on a bench near the park. Then I read the New Yorker and smoked a cigar. Soon my lunch hour was over but I decided to stop by some girls selling home baked goods by the park for their high school. I bought four blondies and headed back.

Frank Burns was dealing with a hip woman and I asked the woman if the coat she was wearing was a Vivienne Westwood. She said no, she bought it at a Salvation Army. We had a nice chat about clothes and rock and roll and things like that as Frank Burns tried to ring up the sale. The woman was buying cigars and Frank Burns had clipped them before completing the sale.

Well it turned out the woman’s card did not go through and that made Frank Burns very angry. And he also left two cigars unable to be sold again since he had clipped them. I spent the rest of the time with Frank Burns avoiding him since his mood was more poisonous than usual. He finally left, leaving me and Jerry Vale to have a good time and a few laughs about Bonnie Bramlett.

It was a good day and once again I led in sales which was nice. October is turning out to be a much better month than I expected and to watch Frank Burns have his pissy little melt down made it all that much better.









The Rutles – Cheese and Onions

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I Don’t Remember

Friday, October 21st, 2011

The Swiss cheese schedule goes on. After a day off yesterday, a day on today as well as a day on tomorrow. It’s gotten nippy out, quite cool. Time to bring out the autumn wear. Had a dreadful dream last night, so dreadful I woke up from it at 3:30.

It concerned me being late for something and knowing that my father was waiting and getting angry was upsetting enough. Woke up dry mouthed and needed some nourishment. It was a hard feeling to shake and the feeling was over 20 years old, bringing me back to Harmon Meadow with my sister and she being late with dad getting pissed off in the car, having had to wait 5 to 10 minutes.

Annemarie would know the feeling I’m sure. It’s a feeling I don’t ever want to feel again. Funny even after 11 years being dead he still has an influence that should be discarded and ignored whenever possible. I was able to fall back asleep though and woke up with Bill kissing me goodbye once again, telling me he loves me so very much.

I was able to muster an ‘I love you too’ as he headed out and I returned to sleep. I got out of bed after listening to Penny Lane being played on the oldies station. Shuffle into the shower after starting coffee and getting cereal all set.

Today was to be work with Zack and Jerry Vale. Not a bad team. Thomas is roaming the Berkshires with his fiancee and who the hell knows where Frank Burns is. A walk to the bus stop, my 2nd favorite bus driver approaching. A crowded bus at the next stop, a woman talking to her neighbor around me instead of sitting in the seat next to him which was vacant.

I had a thought, that it’s not that people are getting stupider, it’s just that there are more stupid around than ever before. They’re breeding!

The cigar shack was quite busy today, Zack taking an early lead, Jerry Vale in second place and me trailing behind. But that changed fast enough and eventually I took the lead. It took me by surprise and I was happy about it.

Now it’s after 8:00PM and of course in the vicinity of the cigar shack things have quieted down a lot. It’s darker out earlier and definitely colder out once the sun goes down. Not much demand for cigars after dark. Now we approach 8:30 oh so slowly.

Bill has his play that he’s stage managing tonight so I will be home before him I suppose. And of course I can’t get home fast enough. I mean I can’t even get out of the cigar shack fast enough. But not to worry, it will happen soon enough, of that I am sure. People are bundled up as they stroll past the cigar shack window leaving me to believe there is a sub-arctic chill in the air. Last one out is a rotten egg.

Oh, Ian Stokowski stopped by. He’s the head of a company and after bemoaning the fact that he couldn’t’ find an office manager for his company that moved to midtown Manhattan last year, asked for my resume then seemingly vanished off the face of the earth. Well old Ian was back, stuck with an office manager that he is none too fond of. I was aloof and showed disdain. It would be hard to work for someone that I didn’t respect. I thanked him for his purchase and saw him out.

And I hope Casey Chasm and family are alright. They just popped into my head.




Paul-McCartney-Ou-Est-Le-Soleil_-Half-Speed-Edit

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I Don’t Know Why (I Love You)

Thursday, October 13th, 2011

En bunden af ​​tønde slags dage. Bogstaveligt talt jeg følte lyst til at græde på et tidspunkt! But enough of all that. Things did get better a little bit but hardly enough. A headache and the weather did not help matters much.

I did see Stine this morning. It was the first time since July and she was looking good. Of course Alexander wasn’t with her, he’s been in preschool lately. The tales she told of him were of course pretty funny. ‘No you can’t eat a fudge brownie in my bed’ ‘Mommy you are making me so unhappy’.

Of course that would sound hilarious from the mouth of a three and a half year old, it doesn’t really translate well onto paper, or in this case, a computer screen. The bus ride was uneventful, met up with neighbor Deborah who was singing the temp blues and is looking to get out of the situation she finds herself in.

She helped organize a Broadway show for autistic children and it was a rousing success. Who knew autistic children would connect so much with Equus? But she is not receiving the proper credit for it and so she starts to read the writing on the wall. She has some irons in the fire so hopefully that will work out for her.

At work it was Bradley and Thomas and myself. It was Bradley’s birthday today so he was in a good mood. He is off tomorrow and to put it in his words, he will be ‘trolling for pussy’. No plans for drinks after work with Bradley. I wouldn’t want to get in the way of his trolling.

I hope when I get home the transfer of my photos and music from the old computer, now stored on Rand’s portable hard drive. Rand needs the hard drive back so I think I will be going home and getting the hard drive and walking it to Rands.

Even if the transfer is incomplete I will have to give it back nonetheless. I though I had transferred most of it earlier but I didn’t finish it. It’s my own fault and all I can say is ‘oh well’. I can up for it anyhow some way.

Now it’s just Thomas and myself and it’s not so bad. Not much is going on and things have slowed down considerably in the realm of the cigar shack. Not much contact with the outside world which is just as well since the last time I went outside it was raining. That is what upset me so.

I was looking forward to going outside for my lunch break but it was very wet outside. Rain and drizzle falling sideways and an encounter with a bird did not help matters much either. I sequestered myself in the closet like office and read Bob Mould’s autobiography which was somewhat entertaining.

I have to finish it by October 19 since another gay punk rocker wants to read it and it’s quite new according to the BCCLS system. Well I came home, climbed the four flights, changed from my suit & tie to street wear, grabbed the hard drive and was out on the street again while Bill was fast asleep. I met up with Rand on Washington Street and made the hand off, telling him to put it in his pocket, it would look like he’s carrying a friend. ‘Cause these guys don’t dance and word is out this our last chance.

I walked Rand home. He’s busy with the ComiCon going on this weekend. He’s working on behalf of the Jack Kirby Museum and on Saturday he is hosting a party/opening at Maxwells, called Kirby Enthusiasm. It’s the reason I took off on Saturday so I could attend and support Rand.

Død over den dovne sutten!


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