Well it’s Wednesday and I thought for a while this afternoon that it was Tuesday. I don’t know why. I’m ok now, obviously, it’s is Wednesday. I just have to keep telling myself that. Bill was here last night, rambunctious like an 8 year old which is fun then I start to feel like a parent with an overactive child with no car for the kid to sit in while I shop. It was cute, then irritation, and then when I thought about it, and thought about Bill, it became cute again. Most of the time, I just have to step back and think about how I’d miss things like this if Bill wasn’t around.

So I enjoy it while he is, or just ignore it until he goes to bed. I guess in these ways I am a parent. He does have a childish innocence and he possesses such a pure joy which I sometimes which I had instead of being jaded and cynical. That’s something I have to work on in the upcoming year. Can optimism be had once it’s gone? I guess we’ll find out, or at least I’ll find out and write about it and tell you later. That’s optimistic isn’t it? Bill once again was up before me and left me with a kiss before he headed off to work.

I stumbled into the shower, grateful to see that Bill made some coffee for me, taking one minute of of my morning routine which made a difference, allowing precious seconds to improve my hygiene. Once again it was 50 something degrees and once again I was smart enough to leave behind the winter coat and just go to work in a suit and tie. Quite a few people had been bundled up considerably, hats, scarves, gloves. They must have been really sweaty dressed like that. I know I was on Monday when I went to work dressed with my overcoat, but not today.

I listened to Television, Marquee Moon on the way through Bryant Park and Grand Central Station. I really liked to listen to it this morning, for some reason a few months ago I couldn’t stand to. Don’t know why, it is a classic record and I learned how to play guitar listening to some songs on it. Don’t think I remember the chords now, but with a few hours practice I’m sure I could figure it out. But who has the time? And the concept of forming a band fades into the distance more and more. I can’t even find anyone to jam with.

On my Manhunt profile, I took a chance and removed most of the sexual things I might be looking for and basically put an ad up saying that I was looking for someone to jam with. Got one reply from some guy in town who likes to play guitar nude. Whatever, I just want to play guitar or bass. I have both instruments you know. True, posting a music ad on a hookup site isn’t necessarily the thing that will guarantee results, but then again the sex angle wasn’t working that well anyhow.

I should have taken that as a tip. No one wants to play with me either sexually nor musically. I can always do it myself I suppose, musically. Most everyone knows I can do the sexual bit on my own, par excellence. Bill could engineer a session, he does have the recording equipment, keyboards and a drum machine which is just fine by me. Somewhere down the line, perhaps we’ll find time to do such a thing. Until then I wish you all a good day, or a good night. See ya!