Cigar Shop | johnozed

Here is a recap of sorts. Had off yesterday, Sunday. Had a dream before waking up, where I was in Lodi, in the house that I grew up in, or more likely in the backyard with the family dog, Bojo. Bojo was not really himself.

Looked like the beagle terrier mutt that he was but he was happy and without of of the neuroses that the actual Bojo had. He was pleasant to be around, like a dog you see on TV. That’s how I woke up.

Yesterday was the day off. Laundry done and not much else. Just farted around. I went out for a bit but it was drizzly and decided to come home after returning The Lovely Bones DVD to the bibliothèque. It was not the laugh riot that I expected.

Actually I was not expecting any laughs, I knew what was going to happen and I wasn’t much in the mood for child rape and murder. Call me old fashioned. I actually rented it since the score was by Brian Eno but most of the songs were songs that I already had.

From what I gathered, the last song in the movie was a piece from 1973 and updated for the movie, but I didn’t get that far and figured the movie would be on cable eventually. I watched Boardwalk Empire but feel I enjoy it more when Bill is watching it with me, and he wasn’t home.

He was home in time to watch Mad Men, but didn’t see the whole thing, going to bed midway through. I eventually joined him around 12:30 and tossed and turned for an hour. Couldn’t fall asleep.

Couldn’t help but think of other jobs that I had. When I go on interviews, no matter what I usually freeze at the end, when they ask me if I have any questions for them. ‘Do I look fat in this?’, turns out to be not such a good question.

Nor is asking if their gender reassignment was an easy process to go through. I did come up with some valid questions, such as, ‘How many people are in the firm?’ ‘How many people will I be supporting?’ And my favorite, ‘What’s for lunch?’

Bill was out again this morning earlier than I was. It was pouring rain outside, which made for good sleeping in weather. I bargained with myself and got 15 extra minutes. Got up listening to Ben E. King singing ‘Stand By Me’.

I took that to be a good sign as I walked to the shower after making some coffee and pouring out a bowl of cereal. When I walked back in the bedroom, the Fabs were singing All You Need is Love. Another good sign I hoped.

Soon I was out the door, happy that it wasn’t raining just then. Everything was wet. Onto the bus and out into the terminal, down the stairs and onto the subway platform where a guy was playing I Me Mine. Not your every day Beatles song you hear busking.

I gave him a buck and hopped onto the train. When I got off at my stop, it was pouring out. No place to hang around before heading in, so I went in. The usual characters, the usual paranoia.

And since it was raining I had to spend my time indoors, in the cigar shop, which wasn’t so bad after all. I had my nose buried in a book but was drawn into a conversation about the state of pop music today.

It was agreed that hip hop doesn’t have much of a shelf life.

yesterday's me

Another splendid day. Things just keep getting better and better. Makes all the whining about the job seem pointless. Bill was on his way home when I woke up so there was no good morning kiss when I woke up.

I showered and had coffee. Not enough milk for cereal, but no worries. Love love love cools down a cup of hot coffee enough. A shower, some email and then Bill walked through the door with more love and bagels too.

A nice walk to the bus stop, sunny morning pleasant enough. The loveliest bunch of commuters on the bus, some wearing my favorite sports team t shirts and jerseys, god bless those New York Yankees.

In Manhattan, a walk up the avenue, handsome and good looking people eating brunch. Even the homeless people looked fabulous. Cute little dogs pooping and pissing wherever they want was adorable. I stopped by the farmers market again, buying cookies which I decided once again to keep to myself, not sharing with my co-workers.

They just give so much, but I decided to hide them away. It was Don and Sean again. Don was in good spirits really and Sean was suffering from a hangover. He had gone out with Raymond and a few other people last night and being 20 years old and quite stupid, was suffering from a hangover.

He spent the day as expected, staring into space and doing as little as possible. I tried to engage him, get him to do things to help pass the time but he was incredibly reluctant to do anything.

He did ask me to pick up cigarettes for him in NJ since they’re half as much money and bring them into the city, but there was no incentive to do it. And I think he’s a little turd. Carrying packs of Newport 100’s as a mule just wasn’t going to cut it.

Don and I did have a laugh about the fact that about 25 years ago, the only people that smoked 100’s were women. Now it’s all thugs and thug wannabes. Of course it was a different world 25 years ago, and better in one sense that Sean wasn’t born yet.

A chat with Annemarie was brief with unease on both sides. It was upsetting on my end and so much so, that though I decided not to have a Xanax since neither Calvin or Marcus were in, I took one. Took the edge off of things once again, but then again I had to deal with Sean.

The 19 year old that he’s fooling around with was hanging around the store, keeping her invalid boyfriend company before he sent her away, opting to fall asleep in the back room. For some reason I continued to try to engage Sean, suggesting that he do things, take a walk around the block, get some fresh air and even suggesting that he leave work early, claiming sickness.

No, staring into space was the thing to do in his case, perhaps praying to the god who’s rosary beads are tattooed on his forearm. Praying and perhaps complaining about how bored he is certainly didn’t pass the time.

Calvin and his wife and kid stopped by the store, on their way to a jazz concert in nearby. Subjecting a child to jazz just sounds so cruel. Don was too busy being invisible and once he left at 7:30 I did my best to stay away from Sean as much as possible.

Stayed in the backroom while he looked at his shoes in the front of the store. Counted the money in the safe a few times as well, and put all the presidents faces in the same order.

It’s humorous, Sean is trying to get a job at Coach, the high end whatever store. He asked me a week or so ago if he could put me down as a reference. I agreed, willing to help.

Lately, I wonder what I would say if I get a call for a reference. Perhaps I could say I was an adviser to him by court order for a shoplifting charge. Sure it’s a lie, but then again so are parts of this entry.

I blame it all, on those nights on Broadway.
And no entry tomorrow.