Tag Archives: Bill

I Understand Just How You Feel

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Oh how the past 24 hours have been a rollercoaster. Lazy start in the morning yesterday, heading into the city to have lunch with Pedro, fun phone call with Annemarie. It was a fun time with Pedro, meeting up at the Astor Place cube.

We walked down St. Mark’s Place and wound up at BBQ, which is tacky but where we’ve eaten before. Lots of stories from Pedro, not about Rikers, but rather about his life. I’m not one to spill the beans, it’s his story and not mine and way too personal.

Over a few drinks we laughed and talked and eventually wandered around the East Village. Pedro dropped me off near the bus terminal after unsuccessfully trying to talk him into dropping me off in Hoboken. He probably would have done it if it weren’t for the bumper to bumper traffic.

I came home and took a nap. Bill had ordered a pizza and after a few hours’ sleep I woke up again, hungry for some pizza. No pizza to be had. An argument was to be had though. A loud argument, in each other’s faces. Accusations thrown back and forth. It got ugly fast and ended just as fast.

Bill apologized and I accepted. I did not sleep well at all last night and woke up feeling quite queasy and dehydrated. I figured there was no way I would be able to get through the day, spending 9 hours on my feet, so I called Marcus’ cellphone and left a voice mail message explaining my situation in semi graphic terms.

I knew I made the right decision in not going into work, still there is some regret and a feeling of dread that I will certainly hear about it tomorrow when I get in. I did follow their rules though and called directly, but I did not call Calvin since he was off today.

Bill had kissed me good bye for the day and he was very apologetic for last night. As I went through the day today I found a few reasons for me to apologize as well. He should be home in about an hour and I can’t wait to see him.

He was an asshole last night and I was an asshole too. I suppose we’re lucky to realize and accept that both of us were right on some things, and wrong about other things, or at least the way the other things were presented.

For me today was a day of feeling a bit unwell as well as regret for the way things turned out to be last night. Things will be better later when Bill gets home and will be better tomorrow. And as for me, I’m not so much a drinker these days and I’m sure alcohol had some say in what happened last night.

Bill and I chatted online earlier, and we both realize we need each other, really yin and yang stuff. I think we turned a corner last night, a hard turn but a turn nonetheless. Bill is home now, and I was able to have a short nap before he came home. And I am glad he’s home.



I Slipped, I Stumbled, I Fell

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Today is Friday and it’s also April Fool’s Day, making it April 1. It didn’t snow, in fact it was much like yesterday. Cold and drizzly mostly. It’s been a slow day at the cigar shack. Last night I left a few minutes early and was able to ride the bus home with Hyman Gross.

Tonight someone has to stay late (Calvin: Want to make some overtime John? Me: No. Get the Bradley to do it.) since there is some maintenance going on in the man cave. There is a very short man crawling around in the ventilation system, cleaning out a lot of gunk that has accumulated over the years.

Last night I took 2 melatonin tablets which helped me sleep so much that I really did not want to wake up and go to work this morning. I slept quite soundly and when I told Bill about the melatonin he asked if he could have a tablet since he hasn’t been sleeping too well as of late. I told them where I keep them.

I also saw Rand while I was waiting for the bus, just for a minute though since he was headed for a meeting at Stacks Pancake house. My type of meeting, lots of syrup. Reading the Keith Richards bio, which I neglected (didn’t know) it was written with James Fox, who probably deserves the lion’s share of credit for the exceptional narrative.

Now Keef is in art school and learning how to play guitar. He’s just met Mick and Ian Stewart and Brian Jones. It really is a fun book, I recommend it. I have until April 6 and since it’s such a new book I can’t renew it since someone is waiting for it.

My left leg is fine mostly. It’s when I stand up after sitting down, that’s when the problems start and then lately it goes away after a few minutes. Is it possible? Am I getting old? I mean in less than 2 years I will be 50 years old and I have to tell you, I never expected to make it this far.

And having written that, here comes a bus, barreling down after me, to make my words and give them that extra dose of irony. And since the Bradley is staying late (and he opened up my usual register) I get to leave a little after 9:00PM tonight.

I don’t think I will wait for the 9:42 bus to ride with Hyman Gross (sorry Hyman) but I would rather just go home and be with the one I love. And having written this much, it’s really one less thing I have to do tonight.

Well I might have written that too soon, since I haven’t hit the 500 word mark yet. For those that play at home, you probably realized that I write about 600 words every day lately, but tonight I will be satisfied with 500.

I hope you are satisfied with 500 words as well, but if you’re not, then TS. Thinks don’t always turn out as planned of course. I left the cigar shack at 9:00, leaving the Bradley behind the counter.

Despite my leg acting up lately, I decided to take my time, enjoy a cigar and walk (not stomp) down the avenue to the bus terminal. I was enjoying David Bowie, a playlist I made for my iPod. The cigar wasn’t that great but the weather was better than it’s been all day.

As I entered the terminal I noticed that I could easily catch a 9:25 bus and be back in Hoboken in no time. I was looking forward to reading more of Keith Richards book and seeing Bill soon enough.

I thought about calling Hyman to tell him I wouldn’t be on the bus with him, but decided and followed that line from Bob Dylan’s The Wicked Messenger, ‘If ye can’t bring good news, don’t bring any’.

I ascended the escalator and as I approached the gate I saw Hyman. He didn’t see me, and I almost kept on going. But I decided to see if he was OK. Hyman saw me and said he was glad to see me.

He said he was exhausted and I offered my arm and together we ascended another escalator and worked our way through self-involved twenty somethings to the gate where we needed to be. The bus I could have taken was idling and Hyman said I could take that instead of waiting with him, but I couldn’t leave him like that so I stayed.

I’m glad I did, it was a nice ride and a nice talk. Now I am home and don’t plan on doing anything else except to finish this entry. And the final word count, 803.