Stress. I was stressed when I was without a job, and now that I have a good job, I am even more stressed out. It’s Thursday. I sat in a weekly meeting, which is something I will have to do each week going forward. Something I will have to get used to and participate in.

I work with really nice people, they see something in me that I don’t see. Bill sees it, Mike sees it. I do not. And it’s stressful. I don’t want to let them down, and I guess I do not want to let myself down. That voice in the back of my head, telling me the worst things about myself. I talk to these co-workers, and I guess I am saying the right things.

I take notes, and for the past two days, I took the initiative when the need arose. And my being proactive was noted and appreciated. My sleep patterns have been adjusted. I stayed up until Bill came home, and I was in bed by 10:00 PM. I was up a little after 6:00 AM. I shuffled along while Bill was already on the road.

I finished The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison and figured reading Gratitude by Oliver Sacks would be uplifting. I had read it before and forgot it was all leading to Oliver Sacks’ death. Tomorrow I am going to reread Sweet Soul Music by Peter Guralnick. That should be alright, I reckon.

My phone has been adding to my stress. Since July 2024, I have been having trouble charging it. The adapter would have to be carefully balanced into the slot, and it was going well since then. The past week or so, it’s been difficult. Stress levels grew.

I figured it was going to be time for me to get a new smartphone. After work, I walked down to Chelsea and visited the Google store. A young woman named Gaby asked if I needed help, and I sure did. I explained to Gaby my problem and she walked away, reappearing a minute later with a can of air, and some tools that resembled.

After a spritz of air, Gaby set about using the dental tools and began digging out a lot of dust and pocket lint. And about five minutes later, Gaby plugged an adapter into the slot and it fit perfectly. I asked if I could do the same, and Gaby stepped away, allowing me to do so. And sure enough, the adapter was snug in the slot.

I thanked Gaby profusely and was soon on my way to the PATH train. I didn’t want to search for a seat, so I wound up walking back to the street where the office where I’ve been working is, which is also where the back entrance to the PATH train is.

Sure enough, I found a seat and started reading a collection about The Fall and Mark E. Smith. Another not so uplifting thing. I bought it soon after Mark E. Smith died, but never got around to reading it, and now I remembered why. It was nothing new, really, it was just a collection of reviews and interviews from the New Musical Express back in the day.

Hello. I am so very tired on a humpday Wednesday. I slept well last night, but I could not get enough sleep. I’m sure I went to bed later than I planned, which more than likely explains why I am so tired. Had a dream where I was in the Port Authority following a friend from the past, Denise Donnell, with her husband Bobby, who was carrying Denise in his arms. I knew it was Denise when I spied her bald spot, but in real life, when I last saw her, she did not have a bald spot.

But this was a dream that could not be explained. Then the alarm clock went off, and they went their way, and I woke up. Bill was on the road when I shuffled around the apartment. I’ve been reading ‘The Bluest Eye’ by Toni Morrison, and I had been enjoying it somewhat, though by the end, which I reached today, it had taken a turn which I sort of expected and yet still took me by surprise. It was not what I should have read before heading into work. Much too heavy for me.

And work has been good so far on this, the third day. My supervisor, Yance, was working at another location, so it was just me and the girls, Kimberly and Janice. I worked with Kimberly mainly on the first day, and we got along fine. Yance mentioned that I was there this week to mainly observe the working methods.

Janice was out on the first day but in the office for the second and third days. This onboarding process has been fine in the office. I’ve met about half a dozen co-workers, though I did forget a meeting this afternoon, which probably did not put me in a good light. The woman I was meeting with was OK with my absentmindedness, and a rescheduling is going to happen at some point.

The staffing agency that has placed me with the company has its own onboarding process. That is more of an online thing, which requires watching videos of the CEO telling his life story as he looks off camera and talks. I’ll be watching that onboarding process tomorrow at work with headphones on.

Janice will be out, and it will be me and Kimberly again, with Yance floating around the office. That was not a put down, more of a description of what Yance does. But I am so tired right now. I think I could fall asleep right now, but the sun is still out and I do not want to wake up at 4:00 AM rarin’ to go.

Bill is on the road, finishing up today’s road trip, and Mike is elsewhere, not answering his phone. Perhaps he having a good time with the company at his crib. I would rather hear about it instead of looking at his photos when he posts them online.

That did take me by surprise, I must say, when I saw his posted photos. He said it didn’t work out with this guy from Massachusetts. I must have been a drag for the Massachusetts man to come so far and to possibly not come after all.