Dreamt about being around the campus at Rutgers University. The rooms were filled with secret doorways. A hunt for a bagel shop that was supposed to be famous. My brother Brian appeared and we attempted to fix a bicycle tire which went better in the dream than in real life 52 years ago. It wasn’t that pleasant a dream.

52 years ago Brian and I were on a bike ride. My chain kept falling off. That pissed Brian off. It wasn’t my fault, I was 11 and he was 15. I was an annoying ball and chain that was left with him to watch. He hated it. He did alright but there were moments that were just hell. I’d rather not get into it, but I am happy to say we are friends today.

And today I went for a walk around Jersey City, the Newport area. I enjoyed a cigar as I walked through. I must have been quite a sight. I looked good, I have to say and I never say anything like that.

I was thinking about John Lennon. He was my favorite Beatle. I identified with him the most. He was funny and acerbic. I remember watching the Beatles cartoons and seeing the cartoon version of him squinting his eyes when he was portrayed singing ‘And Your Bird Can Sing’. He had his faults and readily admitted them.

Nowadays the young folk call him a spousal abuser. He admitted that and so did his first wife Cynthia. She said he slapped her once and immediately apologized. Cynthia said it was the only time that happened. But all it takes is a slap and despite his admitting it and trying to make himself better they apply the label.

He was a fucked up person from a different time. Not an excuse at all, but for a long time, if a man slapped a woman other people turned their heads and looked the other way. I’d seen a few fights at VFW picnics, drunken veterans beating each other senselessly, sometimes over something a wife did or was perceived as doing.

I discussed it with my sister in our weekly phone call. Grandfather putting Grandmother in the hospital is shitty behavior indeed.

Back to John Lennon. 44 years ago this week, John & Yoko’s last album was released. The last album while John was still alive, Double Fantasy. I didn’t understand it when it came out. I loved it since Lennon was on sale again. It didn’t make sense to me until I got older.

It was mellower than I expected and positive when I was into New Wave and Punk. New Wave is now known as Post Punk by the way. Now when I hear Double Fantasy, I feel wistful. It was definitely a more innocent time, at least for me.

Living in my parent’s house, relatively carefree. My parents are gone, the house was sold and I am anything but carefree. But that’s where I am now and there ain’t nothing I can do about it.

Saturday in November. Bill is on the road, just a few miles away, within walking distance. But he needs his rest and the hotel that he is staying at is not pedestrian friendly at all. And with my current financial situation, a taxi or instead of dating myself, an Uber or Lyft is unreasonable. Bill considered coming over for the night but that was even more outlandish. I convinced him that it’s best not to push our luck and stay close to the bus.

Bill was here yesterday during a four hour lull in the charted proceedings. He brought a bagel and a breakfast sandwich, then a thick chocolate pudding parfait thing. He started to complain about not feeling well, so I offered him an orange which he duly ate. Still he didn’t feel all that great which made me lightly berate him on his eating habits.

I wrote lightly because I am ever so careful to not be a nag. He got the point as he always does when this happens. I don’t have the healthiest diet but compared to Bill I DO have the healthiest diet.

He was off on the road again. I had to meet him around 10:00 PM on Washington Street and hand off his luggage which was too much to handle on the initial drive and there was a plan to park his vehicle in Hoboken but that fell through.

It was locked up in the hallway on the first floor for an easy exit. We’re on the uppermost floor and who wants to move from those flights? Not me! Because the plan fell through Bill asked me to move his luggage when he passed through Hoboken on the way to the nearby hotel.

It was no problem at all and it was good to get out in the cool crisp air, something I rarely do these days. Once I climb those flights of stairs, I ain’t leaving if I don’t have to.

Bill just called for the night, he was off on the road again. No longer will he be within walking distance. Soon he will be south of the Mason-Dixon line. He’ll return later in the week. Usually, I melt down somewhat when he’s away for a few days or more. This time I’m alright with it.

So far, at least. I know it will be a matter of time before he walks in and in only a few minutes, start to drive me crazy. As I wrote that, I thought ‘Uh oh…here comes the irony. Having written that about Bill walking through the door…’

Tempting fate I suppose.

My former roommate William always called it tempting providence. I explained that providence was a good thing, and definitely worthy of temptation. Google tells me it’s the protective nature of god or a spiritual power.

The weather has been nice and I’ve been getting my steps in. Tomorrow I will tackle Jersey City. No destination set as yet, but it does seem to be an agreeable day.

Uh oh, here comes the irony…