Category Archives: Cool Cold Reality

Where it is and what it came from. The end-all, be-all, and all-for-a-dollar.

I Don’t Want Your Love

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Well it certainly has been a strange day. It started out with a very good night’s sleep, had two dreams which involved Pedro. Good dreams he was alright, it was like being back in the old days.

We seemed to be hanging out in River Edge where the old Disc-O-Mat was on Route 4. Also a fleeting dream featuring Takashi Moriuchi, a nice guy I used to work with bank in Wanker Banker days and the Takashi dream took place near Wright’s Village in Lodi or South Hackensack.

Bill was up and out and I was sleeping so well I barely noticed. After a five day shift of 10 hour days, having at least one day off was quite nice. It was not so bad getting up this morning and I slept a few minutes later than I usually do. I got myself together and headed out to the bus stop.

Pedro did phone me but that was because I texted him before I headed out. We have a great bond, the two of us. Truly one of my dearest friends.

Right now in the cigar the usual crap holiday songs are on repeat, and it adds to the hellish situation.And in the cigar shack, things have taken a turn for the worse. The neighbors a really big bank, started complaining about the smell of cigars and they’ve been doing that since way before I started working here.

There was an agreement to talk to us before going to the landlord, but tha has fallen by the wayside and now lawyers are involved. So at 12:30 the man cave was shut down, costing us quite a bit of business since it’s too cold to go outside and smoke (though I did just that at lunch time).

Certain trolls won’t be around so that’s not so bad but this is a crippling blow to the store on the brink of the holiday saeason which is beaucoup bucks for most retailers. A lot of regulars came in looking forward to a smoke and a smile and they left crestfallen. Even Jimmy Seltzer who is driving with his wife to Nashville for the holiday was dismayed.

What can you do? Now the lawyers are involved. The cigar shack lawyers, the big bank laywers and the landlord’s lawyers. I am a Cassandra in this, meaning I knew this was going to happen and even told Calvin that back in January. Our days may be numbered oddly enough and even then who knows?

I am sick of Christmas and it’s not even Thanksgiving yet. These horrible New Orleans Dixieland songs probably picked by Wynton Marsalis are terrible. Perhaps once in a while they would be fine, but this loop that is playing is wearing me down. This is more than likely a violation of the Geneva convention.

Now I am home and surprisingly met Bill while on line for the bus. A nice ride home with the man I love. And now we are home watching part two of the American Masters series, this time all about Woody Allen. Quite insightful and worth watching.








08 Hey, Snow White

I Don’t Want You Back (Fuck It!)

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I just don’t really understand it, it seems to be a time thing. This time last year I was feeling very much the same only not as intense as I feel now. Last year was a time of uncertainty and nit still is and like last year I am subject to the whims of the universe and man are they kicking my ass.

It is affecting my sleep, at least last night it did. I can’t seem to shut off my brain which leaves me to lay in bed, listening to air escaping from Bill’s sleep apnea mask which is better than his snoring. I went to bed at a decent hour and closed my eyes and tossed and turned and then after about 30 minutes got out of bed, took 2 melatonin tablets and surfed the net for about 20 minutes.

Then I went back to bed and waited for the melatonin tablets to kick in. I guess they did since I did do something resembling sleep, but I wouldn’t call it restful and I wouldn’t say nit was enough. Bill kissed me goodbye saying all the nice things he usually does and I couldn’t even open my eyes. I did speak to him but I really don’t know what we were talking about or even if we were talking about anything besides the usual morning ‘I Love You’.

He left and I stayed in bed eventually getting out about an hour later. Then it was the same thing, shower, coffee, cereal. I was out again on Washington Street waiting for the bus, oblivious to most everything and feeling a few steps behind everyone else in the world.

Neighbor Deborah got on at the next stop and since I didn’t see her in about a week I chewed her ear off. It was quite an interesting story and funny thanks to the spin I put on it. The story consumed the entire bus ride into the city and she was sympathetic as well as supportive, reminding me of a possibility next month which we had discussed in the past.

I got to the cigar shack area and killed sometime before heading in. It was Thomas and Frank Burns (who really does look like a possum when he does not wear his eyeglasses and eats) at the controls. It was fairly busy today so there wasn’t much time to get in each other’s way.

At lunch time I planned on sitting on that bench near the park but found it to be too cold so I went back to the man cave and sat and read the New Yorker (Food Issue- yawn) and Mojo Magazine which wasn’t as engrossing as I hoped. Jimmy Seltzer made an appearance as did My Friend My Friend.

Now it’s just Thomas and I and we are actually doing things. Tomorrow is definitely going to be a long day with a staff meeting at the end of a 10 hour shift. Jerry Vale, Zack, Frank Burns, Thomas and I. Should be a nightmare, at least. I don’t think I will post tomorrow so I will post on Sunday instead.