St. Mary’s Belles

Crazy dreams bled into each other, involving work situations. One involved me throwing a book at a sign that was hanging from the ceiling that I kept missing, and I didn’t realize I was on camera, but a lot of people saw it, and I became persona non grata. Different employees I worked with over the years all kept popping up. Elevators and bathrooms kept moving, and where they used to be, people with different names, which I kept calling incorrectly

It was a frustrating dream just this side of a nightmare. It had a lingering effect for a while after I had woken up.

Today is the fruit stand’s last meeting of the year for my betters. I sat and watched on camera as they ate and drank their food and little snacks. Just a little bit inconsiderate, but then again this end of the year is nothing but inconsideration

A list was provided for full-time employees of the fruit stand that was spoken of where full-time employees of the food stand can get discounted products that do not apply to contracted fruit pickers like myself

Basically, it’s one of the situations where the lines are drawn quite clearly, you are with us, but you are not us.

Tonight I have to attend Yancey’s get together, and then tomorrow morning I have to attend the meeting at that midtown fruit stand, which should be a drag as it feels like it is all right that day before.

This afternoon, a young woman who was born 30-plus years ago perhaps is coming in to tell me how to do the job that I’ve been doing since before she was born

The day started okay, but as I careen through the middle of the day, I am having an existential crisis, whereas I am thinking this is also pointless, and it really is.

I have to come up with goals for 2026, and they cannot be the same goals that I have for 2025. Whatever happened to showing up at a job and just doing the job, and then going home? It seems that the company that placed me at the fruit stand wants to have a lot of control over my life.

Now technically, I can retire in 3 years but I’m almost not ready for that at all, financially speaking.

Yes, this is a job that lots of people would kill to have, and here I am with it, but I find the pressures that are attached to the job or enormous and not so subtle.

And with that and the dream that I had last night, employment is just a nightmare, isn’t it?

I found myself complaining to Mike about this job, and the thing i,s I’m complaining about a job to someone who’s looking for work, which is something that was very similar to Annemarie complaining about her job when I was out of work all those years ago.

The super did show up, and I think he did what he intended to do, so we won’t know until tomorrow when I try to figure out how to do laundry, or if I’m able to do laundry.

Scott Miskoff