The weekend was pleasant. Mike was on his best behavior, and Bill and I are used to him staring at his phone rather than interacting. Bill and I discussed that last night, and I mentioned that Bill and I are the ones who are out of step with everyone else since we’re not always staring at our phones ( though Bill does play games on his phone or iPad quite a bit )

It would be fair to mention that I am on my computer a lot, which Mike had called me out on weeks ago. My hypocrisy exposed. So there were parts of the weekend when I was paranoid about the repercussions from my joke last Thursday morning. I’m still not beyond it, but I’m not as paranoid as I was.

The man who was hired after me is taking yet another sick day, and how that goes over, I couldn’t say, but I do come in every day, generally early.

They are updating the time clock online for a Seattle-based organization. Whereas I used to fill out a timesheet on Thursdays, now I have to clock in and out every time morning, at lunch, returning from lunch, and at the end of the day. There goes the shaving of a few minutes to leave early, so it’s not the end of the world, it’s not even a setback.

It’s like that Seattle organization and the fruit stand are competing with who can be more of a nuisance to their employers or contractors. Today, the Seattle organization has the lead.

Bill was up and out crazy early this morning, and also phoned me around 3:30 accidentally, and of course, it will be up, and I tried calling him back five times, each time getting his voicemail. My uninterrupted sleep was interrupted.

I watched a documentary on Motown one and a half times. The first time, I got halfway into it and then decided to start at the beginning. It was okay, nothing too nitty-gritty since it was featuring Berry Gordy and Smokey Robinson, so it’s mainly all feel good.

So the fruit stand will be closed the Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday before Thanksgiving, but since I work at the fruit stand and not for the food stand, I will have to come in. Yancy has just informed me that I will more than likely have to do one of those days at the Midtown location, so I’d better get some calamine lotion as soon as possible.

I am now at my desk, listening to Nina Simone, watching the time pass so slowly.
Both Bill and Mike mentioned that what I put out there is what I get back, and I’ve heard that numerous times throughout my life and decided to apply it.

So this morning I was playing the first Sounds of Blackness album, specifically the song Optimistic, and Marcus walked by when I was playing it, and probably left him scratching his head, wondering what the hell is going on with me? I followed that with Pastor T.L.Barrett and his Like a Ship LP. I first heard that amazing song watching The Man Who Fell to Earth on Showtime, the series, not the Bowie movie. I believe I have a few copies of the Bowie movie, but I bought the whole series so I can enjoy it once more. And I might do just that tonight.

It is lunch time, Small cigar time.

There is a presence in the air that seems like it’s about to rain, a certain humidity, I suppose.
I just called Bill. I just called Mike, and both of them gave me the brush off. Mike was lying down Bill was eating lunch.

Bill has remarked that I am a night person, whereas he is a daytime person. I believe it to be true. I do generally feel better when it’s nighttime time even though I’d like to be a daytime person. There is a conflict daytime person who works better at night. I suppose I could be me.
Jimmy Chile and I discussed my situation regarding my paranoia.

The joke was best forgotten, and yet I carried the weight of it throughout the weekend; not steadily but occasionally it would pop up, usually when I was alone. He has convinced me that things are okay, I have nothing to worry about, and I’d love to believe him, and so I shall.
But basically, whatever happens happens.

Essentials: fear of God. Vogue: fear of God.
Seems to be a clothing line called Fear of God, which sounds like an awful God to worship. You’re worshiping out of fear doesn’t seem like a good God. Wouldn’t you rather have a God to worship that you’re comfortable with and not afraid of?

I just bought a flat cap for Mike from a hat seller on 5th avenue named Raheem

Exact
October 31st, 2025, it is a Friday, it is Halloween. Another year goes by, and I am indifferent to the festivities going on around me. Each year it gets more and more uninteresting to me. Mike definitely wanted to go to the parade in the village this year, and I think he was very disappointed when I expressed no interest whatsoever. I get out of work at 5:00, the parade doesn’t start until 8:00, and that’s a block away, and I just want to go home, and I do not want to stand around for 3 hours to look at other people march by.

The last time I went to the parade, I was actually in the parade. Bill was with the Church of Stop Shopping and part of the choir. I came from work in a suit and tie and stood around for a few hours, losing my energy and my interest. I looked like a secret service or a bodyguard to the choir, and my disdain was noticeable on my face. After a few hours, we started crawling up 6th Avenue, and I believe it was around 9th Street, but some fools came through the barricades on the side and tried to shove a carrot up my ass.

It was not pleasant and decidedly ended any interest and continuing this charade of a parade.
Before that, an early date of mine and Bill was in the 2000s, and we met around 22nd Street. I brought Julio as my wingman, and we attended the parade. And it was okay, I think Bill was disappointed that Julio was there, and at that point, 25 years ago, I had no idea how long Bill and I would be together happily years later.

Mike has definitely jumped into the leather end of things; he bought a leather jock and leather pants and leather gloves, and a leather ball cap. Fascinating, I suppose, whatever floats his boat. He does have a sense of humor, which makes me think he won’t fit in with a leatherman, just I find most of them just dreadfully boring, though I don’t really say I’ve had much interaction with them. Mike is not boring.

I did have one interaction years ago on the east side, and I didn’t last more than 5 minutes. I did not find him attractive; he was just too demanding as soon as I walked through the door, and within a moment, I was back out on the street.

Mike is supposed to come over tonight, that would be nice, and it would be okay if he does, it’s either nothing against him, but I am just so tired and don’t want to be entertaining, although lately it doesn’t take much to entertain him. Bill is on the road doing a trip and coming back tonight from Pennsylvania, which does not make sense to me, but it must make sense to him, which is why he’s doing it.

Work is appalling today, just a hangover from what happened to me yesterday with my bad joke. Hardly anyone is in today. My coworkers are not doing anything, really; it seems like I’m doing all the work.

You know it’s not bad work, it just leaves me wondering where everyone is. They are of course about 20 blocks away I am here and letting things simmer as was discussed in the meeting last Friday so I set a timer I see a request and I set a timer for 20 minutes on the 20 minutes are up and no one else has picked up the request that’s when I will do it but only after 20 minutes and it is on a timer so it is exact.

Saturday afternoon, November 1st, did not post last night. Mike came over, shot some videos, shot some photos. He has some new gear that he wanted to show off, so he took care of that. Things are good between Mike and me. He is now at the crib with Bill, helping Bill out with an audition reel for an advertisement. Mike is enthusiastic about it, and Bill appreciates the help and teaching Mike about the process.

When I was leaving the supermarket earlier and heading home I passed a young man who looked like me 35 years ago, albeit a little bit heavier and a few inches taller, but he looked so like me in a skewed manner.