Thursday slept incredibly well last night too well perhaps. I did not set the first alarm clock so I slept through that and woke up with a second alarm clock which is a few minutes later but it offset my day.

So it was a hustle to get out of the apartment and I did and everything was on time. I was soon on the train with my book. I got to the office, had a bagel and lost a tooth on my prosthetic upper. Bill had his scheduled trauma yesterday and mine is today and the way things are going, Mike’s dental might be tomorrow but let’s hope not.

I just feel a bit off today. I should go to bed earlier tonight. That’s what I say 11 or 12 hours before if it holds up that would be great but I doubt it. Again I might have to leave work early to drop off the upper prosthetic and pick it up tomorrow which means I might need to take a day off of work to do such a thing and I won’t know until the dental lab is back in touch with me. I did call Dr Ari and they said they can fit me in on Monday afternoon which is a bit late for me.

If I could drop off the upper this afternoon and pick it up tomorrow that would be great. It’s just a glue job as far as I know these are professionals and I am not. I’m just a patient losing his patience. And work is good but I keep making a tiny mistake that could eventually add up.

So right now I’m feeling blue and sent text to Bill and sent text to Mike and neither one responded because they’re working on lines for Bill’s play next month and I’m feeling isolated so I called up Bill and he told me his story why blah blah blah blah blah and then Mike sent me a text calling me a crybaby following up with lol and at that point I removed his favorite star and put my phone onto not disturb because that’s one thing I did not need.

I’ve been feeling blue for the past couple of days and I haven’t said anything about it to anyone because there’s no one to say anything to but here I am feeling blue and isolated and waiting to hear from a dental lab to see if they can hook me up today and with each passing minute it seems more and more unlikely.

I’m just feeling very sensitive and to read something like that from Mike did not help my spirits at all. Perhaps it’s also because this is the time of year that Bill and I would go down to Ocean Grove and this year we are not and on my social media memories that pop up daily I’m saying other years that we had gone and it looks so much fun and it was so much fun and this year it is no fun.

Lyin’ eyes. Just a song that popped into my head and has no relation to anything going on in my life just a song I grew up with. I still have not heard from innovative dentist whatever New Jersey City which leads me to believe that perhaps nothing will be done this week and I’d have to wait until next week and which case I’ll be looking like it hillbilly for a few days which I guess isn’t so bad but does make me uncomfortable and makes me have to rethink whatever it is I’m going to eat.

Midsummer malaise, perhaps. That seems to be about right, and the way this microphone interprets my dictation leaves a whole fucking lot to be desired.

I thought I might take a trip out to Garfield on Saturday to see my sister-in-law and pick up my brother’s jackets and whatever was the contents in the pockets but she’s in Pennsylvania and I am not so…it ain’t happening.

So Saturday will be local and I will be going to a new dispensary to pick up my gummies that allow me to sleep. Jesus Christ I really hope Mike gets these jobs or at least gets through the interviews with no problem and gets one job. He really needs it.

I think smartphones are the ruination of modern society’s day-to-day life. Everyone is looking at their phones except me. I’m talking to my phone but not looking at it. I was explaining to my last night and I might have posted it here before, that school for me seemed to be designed to crush imagination and somehow, I was able to retain my imagination.

I can sit in a room and just stare at a wall and my imagination will take me miles and miles away and a lot of people can’t do that and they’re stuck on their phone. Granted some of them are actually working some of them are actually conversing but when I ride home on the train at night I see people playing games and whatever I know as I say this the whole thing seems pointless I am one man, they are many they are legion.

I removed Mike from the persona non grata list and put them on the Grata list.
And though I slept well last night, I feel like I can go home and go back to sleep. And for some reason, Don McLean’s American Pie floats through my head for the past couple of days specifically, ‘this will be the day that I die’. Now wouldn’t that be ironic, as something that I had written turned out to be one of the last things that I had written before I died hahaha.

I’m actually trying to be a better person and not pass judgment on people that I see, despite their appearances, despite my attitudes I see them and I pass comment and I had and then regret it but stayed in my head it doesn’t leave my mouth which is fine by me although karmically it might have upset the balancing of the books of karma. Sitting on the streets of Manhattan there is quite a lot to see.

I would like to be able to leave my phone behind for a few days, just let it go but it’s too tied to my job as well as my life and my point of contact for friends and family.

I just saw a woman startled by a butterfly so much so that she started to run in the opposite direction of a monarch butterfly was merely trying to find someplace to alight.

Something’s going on, people on a tourist bus are standing up, taking notice of something that is going on in the corner of 16th Street and 5th Avenue. Someone’s yelling sounded like a woman earlier, now it sounds like a ma,n sounds like trouble. Summer in the City. Now, about a half dozen police officers are on the scene, and I have no idea what’s going on, and I intend to keep it that way. But now there are six police SUVs that have pulled up and have stopped traffic.

I forgot to wear my sunglasses and also neglected to apply my CBD balm this morning.

And now the emergency services unit truck has pulled up with lights flashing. The traffic has stopped on 5th Avenue, and people are standing around wondering what’s going on. This day seems to be getting more and more strange.

I was feeling isolated before, and now I find myself wishing for isolation. Right now, I just don’t like to be around people, or at least don’t want to be. I got about 3 hours to get through. Too much time in my head.

End note, the lab called, my upper prosthetic has been repaired. I left work early to get the denture and now I am home, Mike is on his way to his crib and Bill is rehearsing his play. I will be back at work tomorrow.