It’s time. I am just starting to get writing. It was a good day, nothing too heavy. Bill’s presence is lovely and warm and supportive. We walked to the supermarket and those treks are sometimes soul-baring, usually me being neurotic. It was a good walk nonetheless.

Other than that we watched a lot of TV. Streaming thrillers, to me they’re all blending together. The Diplomat, The Madness, and The Agency. All good and engrossing. The writing is good, the casting is good. It’s a departure from the lighter fare that I generally seek out.

There is also, Cross which was getting to be too heavy two episodes in. Aldis Hodge is definitely someone to watch but it’s a detective story stretched out over I don’t how many episodes. It’s on Amazon which is running out in a few days.

Not feeling giving Jeff Bezos a chunk of money which is not in the budget. He doesn’t need it and will probably not miss it. Out of all the streaming services we have we don’t watch it as much as the others. I use Hoopla and Kanopy more often and those are the free streaming services provided by the local bibliothèque.

The job search goes on. I cast my bread upon the waters with diminishing returns. I think Bill being around alleviated some of the depression that accompanies the paltry job search replies. Bill is sleeping now, the news is on. I haven’t been watching much of the TV news. I guess my info is from the World Wide Web mainly.

Reputable sources indeed. Too much bad news is a deterrent. I still try to be informed. Bill subscribes to the online New York Times as well as the New Yorker and I throw a few bucks at the Guardian from Manchester, UK.

The holiday season is upon us, like it or not. It’s going to be cheap this year. I bought a gift for Bill already. I cut off my hair and sold it to get him a gold Apple watch fob.

Tomorrow promises to be more of the same, but different. Same as it ever was. So it goes. I have to admit I am a bit anxious about braving the crowds when Mike and I go see the Rockefeller tree.

It’s all in the timing. I remember going with Miriam after a News Corp holiday party. It was a good party. Lots of food and drink and the gift bags wound up being gifts that I gave to family and friends that year.

That must’ve been about 20 years or so. Miriam and I left and wound up smoking a joint on the sidewalk and checking out the tree. I don’t remember the time but I do recall there weren’t as many people as I would have thought. I was also a little bit drunk and a little bit stoned.

Ah, life was simpler then. Now Miriam is a mother of 3 lovely daughters, married to Joe the firefighter for I don’t know how many years.

I am guessing it’s Monday, the return to work day. I am still haunted by my dismissal. I have no choice but to get over it but it is there, my bitterness and depression usually when I first get out of bed. I had a routine and it’s the loss of routine that weighs heavily on my mind.

Mike came over last night and that was fun. TV, beers and internet shenanigans. It was too late for him to make the train home plus he needed to be at work in the morning. His job is about 20 minutes away on foot, so he crashed over here. It was pleasant enough.

And once he was gone in the morning I was left to my own devices which take a dark turn since it was Monday and I ain’t got no job. Bill was on his way home so for a few hours it was just me being despondent. I didn’t leave the apartment at all so that throws my step count away. I do those things, counting steps and trying to get interesting patterns on the map showing my stepping.

I finished the leftovers from Thanksgiving, they weren’t going to last much longer. Tomorrow I will go outside. It’s been so cold though and I know it will be even worse in just a few weeks. Mike asked me if I would go with him to see the Rockefeller Christmas Tree and I said yes, but it would be between the holidays. Already I am wearing longjohns in my mind’s eye looking at the tree and avoiding tourists.

Bill is napping. I have to wake him up in about 20 minutes. Then the two of us will fall into our routine of Jeopardy and whatever else we had recorded. I recorded some Monty Python and I watched some of Life of Brian on BBC America.

I hadn’t seen it in a while and having read the first diaries from Michael Palin which included the troubles filming and the troubles afterward I was looking at it with slightly fresh eyes. The Python I recorded was Holy Grail, Life of Brian, and Meaning of Life along with some live appearances from whichever Pythons were still alive, as there were 6 of them and now there are 4.

I scanned the online job market today and came up short once again. I’d hate to think I shot my wad the first time up at bat with the only interview so far. I left walking on air but gravity always wins. The job is still posted on their website which of course leads me to believe that no one knows how to use a buffer on marble floors.

No one is up to snuff and it is definitely a top-shelf company. They can afford to be choosy. The former NYPD guy who interviewed me seems satisfied with the interview, but in hindsight he may have been playing the role of ‘Good Cop’.

Still, if they decided to call me back, who am I to deny their request?

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I asked Gemini what it thought and it said:
“It sounds like you’re going through a tough time right now. Losing a job can be incredibly stressful, and it’s understandable to feel down and frustrated.

Here are a few things that might help:

Focus on the positives: While it’s okay to feel down, try to focus on the positive aspects of your life, like your friendship with Mike and Bill.
Maintain a routine: Even though you don’t have a job, try to establish a daily routine. This can help you stay organized and productive.
Take care of yourself: Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, eating healthy, and exercising regularly. These things can help improve your mood and overall well-being.
Seek support: Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about how you’re feeling. Sometimes, talking to someone can help you feel less alone.
Stay positive: Keep your spirits up by doing things you enjoy, like watching movies, reading books, or spending time with loved ones.
Remember, this is just a temporary setback. With time and effort, you’ll find a new job and get back on track. Stay strong!”

This is the Gemini version. Half the word count and none of my personality
Monday morning, the start of another workweek. But for me, it’s a stark reminder of my recent dismissal. The bitterness lingers, a persistent cloud that often overshadows my mornings. I miss the routine, the structure, the sense of purpose it provided.
Last night, Mike came over. We relaxed, watched TV, and shared a few laughs. It was a much-needed distraction. He stayed over as it was too late for the train and his job is a short walk away.
Now, as the quiet settles in, the weight of unemployment presses down. Bill is napping, and I’m left to my own thoughts, which tend to spiral into a dark abyss. I haven’t left the apartment all day. The thought of facing the cold and the world beyond my door seems daunting.
I finished the Thanksgiving leftovers yesterday. Tomorrow, I’ll force myself outside. Mike invited me to see the Rockefeller Christmas Tree, a welcome distraction. But even that seems distant, a future event clouded by uncertainty.
I’ve been rewatching Monty Python. Life of Brian, in particular, feels poignant now. The world, it seems, is full of idiots. I wonder if I’m one of them.
I’ve scoured job boards, but to no avail. That one interview, the one that filled me with hope, now feels like a distant memory. Perhaps I wasn’t the right fit, or maybe they simply haven’t made a decision.
For now, I’ll cling to small comforts. A good book, a warm drink, and the company of friends. I’ll keep searching, keep hoping. But in the meantime, I’ll try to find solace in the mundane.