Misunderstanding

It has been one of those days. It started OK. Bill was gone when I woke up. I am trying to go to bed a little bit earlier than usual so that meant I was waking up a little bit earlier but not getting out of bed. Doing my best to not open my eyes to see the time, I eventually did and saw it was 7:30 so I got out of bed.

The first thing I do when I get out of bed is make the bed. I’ve been doing that for years and read something a few months ago that suggested doing just that to start the day off with an accomplishment. I do it just in case I need to, or decide to go back to bed. That rarely happens but it’s good to know that it’s there and ready for me.

The self-evaluation at work is due on Friday and I keep writing and rewriting and editing. Some things I realize are that there’s no way to get away with posting such things and would hasten my departure if I submitted it. So I write, copy, and delete.

It’s due on Friday and I received a posting on my computer that it is due in 72 hours. I kept myself busy at work dealing with Schlomo the DKB. He had an envelope that had been mislabelled. It was noticed after I left. I apologized for the error.

I also explained to the DKB that this could all be taken care of if only the person who picks up the mail would ask me five words, ‘Do you have any mail’ Most of the day I do have mail but his guy doesn’t ask and will check other spots for mail but not ask me and I could have a pile of mail next to me.

The DKB said, ‘Well you know that’s how so and so is’. I told him that’s ridiculous. Five words to ask. I do not want to be his friend I just want the work to get out. He’s not hurting me at all with his disdain, it’s the clients who are sick and sometimes terminal that might suffer because he does not like me.

These people think I am an idiot and not treating the clients with respect, but I do respect these clients and I have tremendous empathy for what they are going through. Yes, I sometimes use humor to put them at ease, I converse with them, asking where they are coming in from, you know- conversational topics.

And when someone is not used to such things, they mishear and misunderstand and that gets me in hot water. The five stages of grief still apply and I am still in the acceptance phase. Nowhere else to go.

I still have to finish the self-evaluation and that is different from what I write here. I write here not knowing if anyone will read this. It’s been over two months now. The self-evaluation will be read by the inhuman resources directress Barbara Shorten and well as Schlomo the DKB. I am anxious to find out how they don’t understand much of anything I do or write.

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