Back to work after nine days off. Woke up with a feeling of dread and by dread I don’t mean waking up with hair like a Rastafarian. I got out of bed at 6:15, such an ungodly hour, Bill was up and dressed and ready for work after a night of snuggling and an elbow to his forehead. I had some cereal and some coffee after showering and spent too much time wonder which black jeans should I wear to work, after that it was which shirt should I wear. I don’t like dressing like this, I want to wear a suit, but there is too much dirty work in my day.

I walked with the other drones headed to the Path train. I saw Plantain Man as I bought my bananas, too self absorbed to see if he was sporting wood. After last week, I didn’t need to. I got on the train and proceeded to read the book I forgot to drop off at the Library as I passed it. The book, ‘The End of Faith’ is, for me, an enjoyable read. Unfortunately it’s due today and I couldn’t renew it because someone else wanted it. I wasn’t through with it and wound up buying a copy in the city. (Remember, you were reading page 140 Johnozed) The author, Sam Harris presents a brilliant case against religion, one that I certainly subscribe to. Spoiler alert: It’s all mythology! I’m moving onto the chapter where Sam Harris goes after Jean Beaudrillard and Noam Chomsky. Intellectual cat fight! YES!

There are some good people at McMann and Tate and I like them and they like me. But the way the place is run, so slipshod distresses me. Which is odd since I used to fit in a situation like this, way back when working for Rupert Murdoch. But I find I prefer organization to this. I had a new assistant, another day temp, this one named Christina, of course very nice and helpful and of course they’re going to let her go, instead flying in someone who used to work in the San Francisco office to see if she’d like to work in the New York office.

She’ll be in tomorrow supposedly. I arranged to have a car pick her up at the airport to take her into Manhattan. They’re probably putting her up in a hotel. I wonder if they’re maneuvering to get rid of me. I wouldn’t put it past them. But who will clean up after these pigs? Believe me it’s not an easy task, rather soul crushing I must say. Yes, an atheist who claims to have a soul, and a crushed soul at that. People like Lizzie B, and Alan, formerly amiable make it worthwhile and there are one or two others who are quite pleasant and helping them out is a pleasure. There are other nice people who vent with me about how things are in the office.

Throughout the day I worked cleaning things that were in such a bad way since I was out last week. So much trash, so much inconsideration. I fled at 5:30, having Christina the temp turn the night phones on at 6:00. I walked through Manhattan, smoking a Padron, wondering what to do. Can I hang in there at least until January, get the bonus and split? Actively start looking for a new job? I’ve sort of since June really. Perhaps even before that, when I tried to get back to good ol’ Wanker Banker. Time will tell patience is required.

Patience is what I nearly lacked when I finally dropped off ‘The End of Faith’ I tried to find out why I can’t get a copy of Sam Harris’ other book, ‘Letter to a Christian Nation’. Twice I saved it in my http://bccls.org account, the cooperative library for Hudson and Bergen counties. Twice it vanished. Divine censorship or computer glitch? Hoboken has it, but it’s out and they can’t hold it for me. Argh.