Tag Archives: Neighbor Deborah

I Love America

Another day of cleaning. It was a lot more difficult this time since photographs were discovered. That always slows down the process. Things slow down to a halt and pictures are looked at which is the start of things really getting slow. I found a whole bunch of pictures, mainly from the 1990’s. Family and friends. A few pictures of Julio and William in Weehawken and some photographs of the three of us in Central Park after ingesting some fungi. Some camping pictures of me and Maurice Menares from the 1980’s have popped up as well. And of course there were papers to be shredded.

Including some more papers from the cigar shack, with credit card information of the customers. That was definitely shredded since I do not want any knuckle draggers ringing my bell. No need for that really. And Zack’s plan for 2011 and 2012. Looking at those things made me glad I am not there anymore. I did have to go out once or twice today and on one excursion I ran into my downstairs neighbor Deborah as I was out on the street. She was looking mighty pretty and I walked her to the bus stop where we talked.

She remarked that I was looking great and seemed to be in good spirits and I felt I was in good spirits. A few laughs were had as we sat in the shade. My second favorite bus driver was brought up, and I told her that I hadn’t spoken to him since I was dismissed from the cigar shack. He’s a good guy and I hope to say hello to him once again when our path cross once more. It was great to see Deborah again. Though she lives about 30 feet or so from me, I rarely see her.

So once again I am done for the day with the cleaning. The apartment looks alright. Metropolitan Life isn’t going to be knocking on the door anytime soon. But it is an improvement and if you don’t stare, just keep glancing things look OK. I also wanted the apartment to look alright for when my sister arrives in a week or so. The first two rooms are where I focused and the other rooms, well, they’re off limits to guests. One is the bedroom and the other is where Bill and I hang our suits as well as where Bill keeps his keyboards, his desk top and his recording equipment should you want to stop by and steal anything.

I did some grocery shopping once more, back to the nearby supermarket. And tonight the New Jersey State Symphony is playing so I might light up a cigar and wander over there to get some culture. Today was Julio’s birthday as well as Bill’s mother and tomorrow is Bill’s birthday. Very exciting I think. No plans as of yet, anything could happen I suppose. It’s a beautiful evening and I am looking forward to at least getting out of the apartment.

Rest in peace Tommy Killian




NONA HENDRYX – Transformation (STEREO)

I Like- Keri Hilson

It’s been an interesting day, though certainly not as interesting as yesterday. Today was comparatively stress free. I was able to sleep in which was nice. I did have an appointment this morning and I am pretty sure it went well. I woke up and started my day in a similar way to the previous days. A shower, a shave, some coffee and some cereal. I had a nice suit all set to go, fresh from the dry cleaners so it didn’t smell like cigar smoke.

The appointment was in the early afternoon and I am glad I was able to move it. It was originally in the morning and I did make arrangements with the powers that be at the cigar shack, but now that I am no longer in the employ of the cigar shack I was able to move the appointment to later in the day. I headed out into a nice clear morning around the usual time and decided to take the bus to the Path rain rather than walking.

It was quite muggy out and to my surprise (as well as hers) I ran into downstairs neighbor Deborah once again and she too was taking the bus downtown instead of uptown. We had a nice talk about the past 24 hours. She couldn’t understand the reason why I was dismissed, not that I had any ‘real’ reason. They told me I was no longer employed since this here blog reflects poorly on the image of the cigar shack and all that they aspire to be. They asked for and I gave them my keys. That was it and I was out.

Funny how in this day and age how fast word gets around on the internets. Former co-workers and customers all chimed in with words of support and encouragement so that was heartening. I guess it was mainly via Facebook, Linked In, and Twitter that word got out. Some customers even sent me copies of things they sent to the headquarters regarding how they thought management was at the cigar shack. It shouldn’t have been a surprise on their take regarding Zack and Bradley, but it was.

I was tempted to post their ‘thing’ here but it wasn’t my story. I did have a feeling regarding what was going to happen after I got the email sent to me and a carbon copy sent to Bradley to check the cigar shack email. I did have the foresight to exchange email addresses with some customers who have been reading this here blog for a while and it gave me the opportunity to say good bye. A lot of responses came almost immediately with talk of meeting up for a drink and a cigar somewhere down the line.

And it was just former co-workers and customers that I heard from today. I heard from Zack who quite formally (in legalese) requested the password for the blog that I was writing on behalf of the cigar shack. I tried to delete my admin powers and install Zack as the admin, but it couldn’t be done so I deleted the whole thing. It does not exist anymore, anywhere.

That’s fine with me. Zack was right when he also wrote in the email that he sent to Bradley and myself that the cigar shack blog was not as witty as this here blog. It was hack writing overall. I filled a void with the simplest words and terms and also promoted their events. It was done via Blogger through Google and incredibly easy to set up, so they should have no problem starting it up again in whatever manner and format they choose. It’s not like trying to learn an Excel program, it is a lot easier.

I just want my last paycheck, my commission check and a definite reason as to why I was dismissed. Very simple and after that I am gone from their lives and vice versa. I’m not looking for a fight, I’m ready to move on and put it all behind me.

Outside Langone Medical Center




I did get a chance to see the Hoboken Memorial Day Parade which I would have missed...


Moby Grape – Moby Grape – 06 – Omaha

I Like- Guy

It’s Tuesday, and a super Tuesday at that. It started out a bit awry, a bit drizzly as I walked to the bus stop. I listened to Robert Owens ‘I’ll be Your Friend’ a club song from back in the day. I heard it in a porno the other day and sought it out, and uploaded it. It mixed well with the Dopestyle cut, “I’ll Bass You”. I know I heard it in the East Village and it may have been at the Pyramid or the World. Classic cut. Can’t find Dopestyle anywhere though (I just did). As I waited for the bus, I ran into Richard Castro once again. He was headed home and waiting for his bus. We chatted for a while until my bus showed up, with Chief behind the wheel.

At the next stop, downstairs neighbor Deborah got on board the bus and I filled her in on what’s been going on the past week or so with regards to the cigar shack. It was several giggles worth as we headed into the tunnel where we were quite delayed by a major traffic accident. If it weren’t for each other’s company we probably would have been climbing the walls. We discussed this here blog, how I followed a lawyer friend’s advice seven years ago when I started. To protect myself then as well as now, the job is never mentioned by name or address and the names have been changed to protect the idiots.

Deborah thought that was good advice. I know Bill thinks so as well since he has discussed this with his boss, a pro bono lawyer at one of Manhattan’s largest law firms. So my ass is covered by the first amendment. As I walked up to the cigar shack I played a David Bowie playlist. I’ve been playing it a lot lately. So many great songs by David, I ended with Repetition from the Lodger album, which was actually the first Bowie album I ever bought for myself. I always had access to my brother’s and sister’s albums but this one was mine and it wasn’t the Bowie they had remembered.

I made it into the cigar shack later than expected but I did have the foresight to inform Bradley about the accident and my being tardy. He replied ‘No worries’ and I figured that was that. It was Thomas and Bradley today, Zack was off and Jerry Vale was out as well. Since the cigar lounge, man cave has been shut down things have crawled considerably. Not much foot traffic at all coming through the door and it reflected in the sales.

Most of the regulars have stopped coming in, they stopped coming in before the man cave shut down. They’re visiting other cigar places throughout Manhattan, Brooklyn and even Hoboken. Perhaps word got out about how Zack talks shit about them, how Zack says that the cigar shack doesn’t need their business.

That’s how Zack does it. He talks shit about everyone. Which makes it all the more surprising that when shit gets spoken about him he doesn’t necessarily handle it well. And the customers do talk shit about Zack as well. I just paid witness to it, occasionally stepping in to defend Zack but overall I would let them spew forth. No harm no foul, like GZA would say.

I had lunch and a free cigar that a salesman gave me when stopping by earlier in the day. I came back and it was Thomas’ turn to go. I kept myself busy once again, heeding Zack’s axiom- ‘If you’re leaning, you ain’t cleaning’. So witty and yet so clichéd.

To my surprise Zack came in, looking so damn hot in his cigar shack polo shirt. Woof! And then after Zack made his appearance, the next walk in was the inhumane resources person Aaron Burr. Aaron Burr busied himself while in the cigar shack by calling the cigar shack, not realizing he was in the cigar shack it seemed.

A trip to the loo was in order for me and in the loo I could hear the man cave doors opening and closing. I came out and Bradley mentioned that Zack and Aaron Burr wanted to see me in the man cave. I knew a three way wasn’t in order, especially since I used the condoms I usually carry with me on Ruben and Albert Ross last week. I walked in and Aaron Burr stood up while Zack sat there looking fly in his cigar shack polo shirt.

Thanks to former genital massager Marcus telling Zack about this here blog, and sexy Zack with his betrayed ego informed the inhumane resources person- Aaron Burr. Aaron Burr said words to the effect that my blog reflected poorly on the cigar shack and they weren’t having it. They couldn’t very well tell me not to write it, especially since the actual company name has never been used since I started doing time at the cigar shack and the names had been changed to protect the idiots. I actually thought they might have been talking about the other cigar shack blog that I write, that Zack felt wasn’t as witty as this here blog.

So Zack and Aaron Burr asked for the keys to the cigar shack, the drawers. Not a problem. I removed them and handed them over. I was dismissed after getting told I would be paid for the rest of the day. I wonder if my commission will be sent with my final paycheck, since I technically did not do anything wrong so I suppose I will have to wait and see. I saw Thomas and told him goodbye. He was shocked but also had an idea. Bradley once again did his best possum imitation, hiding in plain sight. I shook Thomas’ hand and said ‘cheers’ to everyone else and walked out the door shoulders back, head held high.

I called Bill and told him the news. Chatted with Annemarie and told her the news. Posted on Facebook, and immediately messages of support and dismay came pouring in from friends, family and cigar shack customers. Most everyone knew how unhappy I was working at the cigar shack. And I was unhappy, yet willing to give Zack my support. I remember May 12, 2011 when it was announced that Zack was going to be the manager. I congratulated him and wished him well and shaking his hand while the possum turned beet red and did nothing of the sort.

I also prevented a couple of attempts at what may have been an inside job of someone trying to steal boxes of cigars that were placed with the empty cigar boxes that we give away. Perhaps I told the wrong person, perhaps the person I told was the person who was attempting to steal the cigars following in the former genital massager’s pigeon toed footsteps. I mean, there was no investigation and since I told the manager, you would think they would actively look into who is attempting to steal from the cigar shack. It couldn’t have been a customer since we are on them like white on rice.

True- I wrote things here, but once I would write them I would move on since I had gotten it out of my system. Among the customers, Mr. Seltzer was saddened, Mr. Arbus was shocked and former co-workers Sean and Raymond were surprised. Haven’t heard from Don but I’m sure I will soon enough. Cigar shack neighbor, Mr. Partant wasn’t that surprised at all though. He’s seen them come and go.

And by the way, I was asked at last Friday’s training charade- I was asked what the Spanish word ‘Ligero’ meant, I said it meant ‘light’ and was told I was wrong. Guess who wasn’t wrong?

It was great walking down the avenue with the sun out, and with the bus waiting at the gate I was home in no time. A nice meal after work was had which was a big change from the past two years. Bill is home, proud of me, reminding me of where he works and how the guy he works for despises smoking. I don’t think I will need assistance since once again like I wrote- I did not do anything wrong. It’s not like I was working drunk or giving out Xanax, or stealing cigars etc. like Zack told me how the former genital massager had.

I am also quite happy I do not have to be at the cigar shack at 8AM tomorrow for the ‘new manager assimilation overview’ which sounds like something from the Borg. They want honesty and candor and I was more than willing to lie on Zack’s behalf, but now I don’t have to. There were a lot of things that I had done that weren’t asked of me, and somethings that were set up, will be delivered soon enough. Ah it’s not my thing anymore, I’m sure someone will figure it all out. Someday?

I can sleep in! A new day, a new beginning and already a new lead.

May 22, 2012 was not such a bad day after all.


this will probably the last of this series of this image.


1-02 That’s Him Over There

Lucifer Sam

Tired again. I used to walk around a lot, now when I do a lot of walking around, I invariably get pretty tired. It’s more than likely from sitting in at home and not walking much during the winter months. And also I’m usually wearing a lot more clothes than I do during the warmer months so that makes me heavier.

And then there are the boots which make for trudging. I know these boots are made for walking, and that’s just what they’ll do. But in the wintertime, it’s a schlep.

Bill was off to drive a bus this morning at 2:30 this morning. Somehow I was conscious enough to ask him to turn on his Google Latitude so I could track his progress. I was a bit worried since big snowstorms were headed for the Albany area and that was where Bill and his theater group were headed.

Not worried enough to stay awake and pace the floor. I went back to sleep.

I’ve been setting my alarm clock lately and so I’ve been waking up around 8:30. I know, 8:30. Those of you who are employed like I once was can all roll your eyes at the luxury of waking up at 8:30. The others can just put their clothes on instead of walking around their homes naked.

You know who you are.

I had plans to head into the city to help out Greg Stevens so instead of watching Gilmore Girls which is what I watch at 11:00, I headed out midway through. It was actually the last episode so I recorded it.

Ah, Stars Hollow. In some ways Hoboken reminds me of Stars Hollow. In very vague ways of course. When looking at it on paper it seems absurd. Then again, one of the categories for various entries, is Abstract Absurdist Otherness which is what I sometimes am.

I waited for the bus on Washington Street and ran into a neighbor from my building who was also heading into the city. Deborah from the fourth floor was off to her therapy. I asked perhaps brazenly if it was physical or psycho therapy.

It was psychotherapy.

We had a good talk. I told her of my experiences seeing a therapist, how I couldn’t commit to a long term relationship with them since the problem that got me there in the first place usually solved itself or subsided.

Deborah told me the therapist wasn’t charging her for the sessions, but she was stuck for something to say. I explained to Deborah that sometimes when I was going, I would feel fine and also wondering what I would talk about.

Like, if I had a session on a Tuesday, Wednesday through Monday I was fine, yet anxiety ridden that day trying to come up with something to say. I also did not appreciate being fit into a textbook, as my therapists would usually try to apply those lessons to me.

Not your average bear or wolf, me.

It was a good ride though and me being me, was all blah blah this and blah blah that. A walk across town, stopping at Barnes and Noble to get the latest Mojo. Syd Barrett on the cover, Syd Barrett influenced CD inside.

Made it over to Greg Stevens office and on the way up in the elevator I talked with Alex the IT guy who’s also helping Greg out. Alex mentioned that it would make sense for Greg to hire me as his assistant and I couldn’t help but agree.

Money being tight meant that it isn’t meant to be at this moment. Greg was as flustered as usual as Alex and I moved things around in his office. Soon I was out on the street again trying to find a 25 foot DSL cable.

No luck with that so we decided to order one online and have it delivered by Monday, which is when I will be back in Greg’s office. Walked back to the Path train and then back to the apartment which is where I am now, watching the final episode of the Gilmore Girls.

Advantage in Height

In 1987 I went on a trip to Kitty Hawk, North Carolina with some people from McSwells. Steve Raposito, Susan Sear, Martha Groffin, Julie Meanderhall and Bonnie Hauxhurst.

It was my first and only time that I visited North Carolina. The plan came to being one night at McSwells with the principals involved and it seemed like a fun thing to do. We went in two cars. Martha, Steve, Susan and myself in one car, Julie and Bonnie in the other. Bonnie and Julie were a couple at that time.

It was a long, arduous trip down there. We talked about Blue Velvet which was filmed in North Carolina and was released a year earlier so that added a creepy thrill to this vacation.

I think we went down in May before the summer season. We rented a house across the street from the beach and at the time, the outer banks were still somewhat underdeveloped.

One night after having been there for a few days, Martha, Susan, Steve and I decided to do some LSD. Acid was around quite a bit in the 1980’s. Julie and Bonnie didn’t partake. After an hour the four of us were buzzing nicely and decided to venture out to the beach.

It was quite dark out and somehow I was separated from the other three. Martha also became separated. I recall walking on the beach, singing Walking After Midnight and making a pact with the crabs, telling them I wouldn’t step on them if they stayed out of my way. I

t was a good pact and no crabs were stepped on.

It was only a matter of time when the four of us would meet up again in the darkness. I heard Susan and Steve before I saw them and then the three of us were loud enough for Martha to hear us and reconvene.

Steve and Susan were going on about a penis they found which I believe was a toothbrush holder. Martha actually found a penis sculpture in the sand that was about 10 feet long.

It was quite an impressive sculpture. Perhaps the crabs had something to do with it. The sun came up and we wandered back to the house in the light of dawn.

Not many people were stirring and we needed provisions. I went with someone, could have been Steve, could have been Martha to the generals store where a few townsfolk were there starting up their day.

There was a radio playing Roy Orbison, specifically In Dreams which was also featured in Blue Velvet. Behind the counter was an older woman, older to my 24 year old eyes in a bouffant and skirt dancing around, twirling and singing to Roy Orbison.

I turned to Martha or Steve and asked if they were seeing what I was seeing. They were. We bought whatever it is we were buying, probably cigarettes and got out of there as soon as we could, laughing all the way back to the house.

It probably took a day to recover from the trip. But the vacation wasn’t going to last for me anyhow. On a sightseeing trip, while on a ferry I was suffering from sunstroke and while trying to get to some shade and very angry dog snapped at me causing me more distress.

It got a big laugh from the others, that if I wasn’t doing so well before, the dog snapping at me truly was a side splitter.

It didn’t matter much for me anyhow. A day or so later I was getting on a bus to go to Philadelphia to see Wire playing their first US show in a number of years.

Don’t know why that story came up. I was actually going to write about it the other day. Guess I had nothing else to write about.