Posts Tagged ‘Bill’

I Like- Guy

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2012

It’s Tuesday, and a super Tuesday at that. It started out a bit awry, a bit drizzly as I walked to the bus stop. I listened to Robert Owens ‘I’ll be Your Friend’ a club song from back in the day. I heard it in a porno the other day and sought it out, and uploaded it. It mixed well with the Dopestyle cut, “I’ll Bass You”. I know I heard it in the East Village and it may have been at the Pyramid or the World. Classic cut. Can’t find Dopestyle anywhere though (I just did). As I waited for the bus, I ran into Richard Castro once again. He was headed home and waiting for his bus. We chatted for a while until my bus showed up, with Chief behind the wheel.

At the next stop, downstairs neighbor Deborah got on board the bus and I filled her in on what’s been going on the past week or so with regards to the cigar shack. It was several giggles worth as we headed into the tunnel where we were quite delayed by a major traffic accident. If it weren’t for each other’s company we probably would have been climbing the walls. We discussed this here blog, how I followed a lawyer friend’s advice seven years ago when I started. To protect myself then as well as now, the job is never mentioned by name or address and the names have been changed to protect the idiots.

Deborah thought that was good advice. I know Bill thinks so as well since he has discussed this with his boss, a pro bono lawyer at one of Manhattan’s largest law firms. So my ass is covered by the first amendment. As I walked up to the cigar shack I played a David Bowie playlist. I’ve been playing it a lot lately. So many great songs by David, I ended with Repetition from the Lodger album, which was actually the first Bowie album I ever bought for myself. I always had access to my brother’s and sister’s albums but this one was mine and it wasn’t the Bowie they had remembered.

I made it into the cigar shack later than expected but I did have the foresight to inform Bradley about the accident and my being tardy. He replied ‘No worries’ and I figured that was that. It was Thomas and Bradley today, Zack was off and Jerry Vale was out as well. Since the cigar lounge, man cave has been shut down things have crawled considerably. Not much foot traffic at all coming through the door and it reflected in the sales.

Most of the regulars have stopped coming in, they stopped coming in before the man cave shut down. They’re visiting other cigar places throughout Manhattan, Brooklyn and even Hoboken. Perhaps word got out about how Zack talks shit about them, how Zack says that the cigar shack doesn’t need their business.

That’s how Zack does it. He talks shit about everyone. Which makes it all the more surprising that when shit gets spoken about him he doesn’t necessarily handle it well. And the customers do talk shit about Zack as well. I just paid witness to it, occasionally stepping in to defend Zack but overall I would let them spew forth. No harm no foul, like GZA would say.

I had lunch and a free cigar that a salesman gave me when stopping by earlier in the day. I came back and it was Thomas’ turn to go. I kept myself busy once again, heeding Zack’s axiom- ‘If you’re leaning, you ain’t cleaning’. So witty and yet so clichéd.

To my surprise Zack came in, looking so damn hot in his cigar shack polo shirt. Woof! And then after Zack made his appearance, the next walk in was the inhumane resources person Aaron Burr. Aaron Burr busied himself while in the cigar shack by calling the cigar shack, not realizing he was in the cigar shack it seemed.

A trip to the loo was in order for me and in the loo I could hear the man cave doors opening and closing. I came out and Bradley mentioned that Zack and Aaron Burr wanted to see me in the man cave. I knew a three way wasn’t in order, especially since I used the condoms I usually carry with me on Ruben and Albert Ross last week. I walked in and Aaron Burr stood up while Zack sat there looking fly in his cigar shack polo shirt.

Thanks to former genital massager Marcus telling Zack about this here blog, and sexy Zack with his betrayed ego informed the inhumane resources person- Aaron Burr. Aaron Burr said words to the effect that my blog reflected poorly the cigar shack and they weren’t having it. They couldn’t very well tell me not to write it, especially since the actual company name has never been used since I started doing time at the cigar shack and the names had been changed to protect the idiots. I actually thought they might have been talking about the other cigar shack blog that I write, that Zack felt wasn’t as witty as this here blog.

So Zack and Aaron Burr asked for the keys to the cigar shack, the drawers. Not a problem. I removed them and handed them over. I was dismissed after getting told I would be paid for the rest of the day. I wonder if my commission will be sent with my final paycheck, since I technically did not do anything wrong so I suppose I will have to wait and see. I saw Thomas and told him goodbye. He was shocked but also had an idea. Bradley once again did his best possum imitation, hiding in plain sight. I shook Thomas’ hand and said ‘cheers’ to everyone else and walked out the door shoulders back, head held high.

I called Bill and told him the news. Chatted with Annemarie and told her the news. Posted on Facebook, and immediately messages of support and dismay came pouring in from friends, family and cigar shack customers. Most everyone knew how unhappy I was working at the cigar shack. And I was unhappy, yet willing to give Zack my support. I remember May 12, 2011 when it was announced that Zack was going to be the manager. I congratulated him and wished him well and shaking his hand while the possum turned beet red and did nothing of the sort.

I also prevented a couple of attempts at what may have been an inside job of someone trying to steal boxes of cigars that were placed with the empty cigar boxes that we give away. Perhaps I told the wrong person, perhaps the person I told was the person who was attempting to steal the cigars following in the former genital massager’s pigeon toed footsteps. I mean, there was no investigation and since I told the manager, you would think they would actively look into who is attempting to steal from the cigar shack. It couldn’t have been a customer since we are on them like white on rice.

True- I wrote things here, but once I would write them I would move on since I had gotten it out of my system. Among the customers, Mr. Seltzer was saddened, Mr. Arbus was shocked and former co-workers Sean and Raymond were surprised. Haven’t heard from Don but I’m sure I will soon enough. Cigar shack neighbor, Mr. Prefontaine wasn’t that surprised at all though. He’s seen them come and go.

And by the way, I was asked at last Friday’s training charade- I was asked what the Spanish word ‘Ligero’ meant, I said it meant ‘light’ and was told I was wrong. Guess who wasn’t wrong?

It was great walking down the avenue with the sun out, and with the bus waiting at the gate I was home in no time. A nice meal after work was had which was a big change from the past two years. Bill is home, proud of me, reminding of where he works and how the guy he works for despises smoking. I don’t think I will need it since once again like I wrote- I did not do anything wrong. It’s not like I was working drunk or giving out Xanax, or stealing cigars etc. like Zack told me how the former genital massager had.

I am also quite happy I do not have to be at the cigar shack at 8AM tomorrow for the ‘new manager assimilation overview’ which sounds like something from the Borg. They want honesty and candor. I was more than willing to lie on Zack’s behalf, but now I don’t have to. There were a lot of things that I had done that weren’t asked of me, and somethings that were set up and will be delivered soon enough. Ah it’s not my thing anymore, I’m sure someone will figure it all out. Someday?

I can sleep in! A new day, a new beginning and already a new lead.

May 22, 2012 was not such a bad day after all.


this will probably the last of this series of this image.


1-02 That’s Him Over There

I Like- Jeremih

Monday, May 21st, 2012

“Hopelessly banal with a heaping slathering of ennui”

So today has been a day off, and so far it’s been alright. Nothing special, just a lot of rain. Despite all that, I was still up and about. I needed a new hands free for my phone and finally have one that plays both on my iPod and my phone. I used to have to have to carry two different hands free ear buds, and I probably still will, using the older one as a backup. And I already have a back so now I will have two backups which is alright I reckon.

That entailed a trip to Radio Shack where I stood and looked at the wall of hands free things before deciding on one after talking with the sales associate who was crazy cute. An older chap with salt and pepper hair. No, nothing happened but it definitely added to the whole experience overall. From there it was a walk in the rain under the Wanker Banker umbrella that is perfect for stormy days like today.

And of course I talked on the new hands free with Bill who got the Staten Island Yankees national anthem gig. I am sure it’s only one game, but it brings him that much closer to singing for his beloved New York Yankees. Growing up, my family was New York Mets fans and I still support the Mets (though I usually don’t care) over the Yankees. But of course if Bill winds up singing in the Bronx at Yankee Stadium, you can bet I will be there.

I can’t say often enough how great it is to have Bill in my life. And we swear to be together forever. He still drives me crazy with the things he does, or the manner he says things (you have to be there, though he more than likely would not do it in front of anyone but me). But like I have explained to friends and family, When he starts driving me crazy, I take a step back and realize how much I would miss it if he stopped doing those things, or not around to do those things.

He’s my rock with ambitions to be a mountain.

And now I am going to do something that bores the piss out of some people. Still I hope to get some sort of discussion going on with regards to the following.

It’s the Return of the iTunes Shuffle!

Rufus Wainwright- Out of the Game
The opening track from Rufus’ latest record, Out of the Game. It is the pop record that was written about in the music papers and blogs the past few months. In fact when I was at the Hoboken Art & Music Festival earlier this month, while talking with Jane Scarpantoni, she reintroduced me to Andy Peters who played with Jane in Tiny Lights. Andy Peters is touring in Rufus Wainwright’s band now, and gives me a Six Degrees vibe. It’s a good song, close to an Elton John song from the mid-seventies and you know that can’t be bad.

The Beatles- Yellow Submarine
Darlington County Park, my parents station wagon with our neighbors the Foglios following in their car. One of my first musical memories was this song at that time and place. Still a fun song and it still makes me feel like a kid. The movie has just recently been remastered and released. Supposed to be great, but having seen it eight million times, I’ll pass though I would accept it as a gift with a smile.

Ben Gibbard/Feist- Train Song
From the still fantastic Dark Was The Night- Red Hot Organization compilation. I bought it as a lark when it came out since I have supported the Red Hot Organization through the years. I didn’t expect to like it or even LOVE IT but there you go. The Red Hot Organization does work for AIDS Charities and education and promotes Safe Sex and has been at it for over twenty years. Support them!

Budos Band- Nature’s Wrath
A great band, very funky and they remind me of Konk from back in the day. I saw Budos Band play a set at Maxwells a few years ago and they room was definitely swinging like it used to, and perhaps still does. At least it was swinging that night. I even went downstairs during the break in their set and told them how much they reminded me of Konk. They seemed to appreciate it and I thought it was cool they knew who Konk was. This song even has a flute on it and I don’t really mind even though the flute really isn’t on my list of favorite instruments. Sorry flautists that I know and love. You’re great, but I just don’t care for the flute.

Michael Jackson- Ain’t No Sunshine
From Michael’s childhood years, really a beautiful version with his adorable voice on the Bill Withers classic. It doesn’t sound like the Jackson Five singing back up so this must be from one of his early solo records. Definitely a Motown production and he is really hitting those notes. This is one of those songs that I have but never played before. A nice surprise and a nice way to fade out the way I faded in. Vocalists like Rufus Wainwright and Michael Jackson bookending this here Return of the iTunes Shuffle thing.

“I told you so.”





06 Hey You

I Lie Around

Saturday, May 19th, 2012

It’s been another day. Today was a Saturday and as far as I know it still is, though for some of you it is already tomorrow. Glad I did not have to wake up early for another round of Pakistani charades like yesterday. Who knew Bradley was so versant in Urdu?

Bill was up before I was and actually started to converse with me as I lay sleeping. I pleaded (read: snapped) at him to please let me continue sleeping. He should have known better, but still what he said was encouraging. He keeps saying he has my back and I certainly believe him. He knows what has been going on and has been able to make light of the situation.

I caught the bus as usual, rode into Manhattan. Near the bus terminal was the usual weekend flea markets and the avenue was filled with people headed to a food festival. I avoided that so I would not be late for work. My co-workers were Jerry Vale, Bradley and Zack. Jerry Vale was his usual effervescent self, Bradley just grunted and Zack to my surprise waxed effusive.

I set about doing the things I do, making sure items were in stock so the store would run smoothly. There were lots of fingerprints on the glass, doors and windows so I took care of that. Some of my favorite customers came in, some specifically looking for me and it was good to see them.

It was a busy day over all. I had three Asian women to deal with and as I finished their transaction I asked if they were Japanese and they said no, they were Korean and pretty. ‘You certainly couldn’t say that if we were Japanese!’ I nodded and then kept my mouth shut after thanking them as they headed to the door.

Lunchtime came soon enough and I decided to check it out. It was in Hell’s Kitchen which used to be dodgy, but now it’s like Chelsea now, meaning pretty gay. And things being what they are I of course ran into a former hook up, Ruben. He lived nearby as I remembered and wondered if it was a Freudian thing that got me there.

There must be something in the air, perhaps its spring fever since it finally does feel like spring, but I allowed myself to be seduced and went back to Ruben’s studio apartment. It was just as I remembered our previous encounters, lots of laughs, quite a bit of moaning and throbbing and I have to admit it is quite sexy when Ruben talks in Spanish during intercourse.

It’s like a Gomez/Morticia thing, with Gomez going bananas whenever Morticia would speak French. A few pile drives later and a quick jump in Ruben’s tiny shower and I was back on the street headed back to the cigar shack. Luckily I stretched beforehand so there were no Charlie horses to contend with though my shoulders did ache a bit from Ruben’s legs resting on them.

It was great to see Ruben once again and we exchanged numbers. His schedule is quite erratic, more than mine- and said anytime I wanted to stop by on my lunch hour- he was up for it both literally and figuratively as am I, even right now. A Five Hour Energy drink was purchased on my way back to the cigar shack so I would not have any flagging spirits throughout the rest of the day.

A few hours later and Bradley split first, then Zack with Jerry Vale and I manning the fort. It was a bit busy oddly enough before closing and I thought about paying Ruben a house call on the way home, but decided against it since I am working with Zack and Jerry Vale tomorrow. I did text Ruben and we might have a lunch date tomorrow, so that’s something to look forward to for sure.



Ruben Ruben Ruben (old modeling pic)


04 From a Buick 6

I Know You Well

Monday, May 14th, 2012

OK, the less said about Saturday, the better. May 12 hasn’t been a good day or me for about 20 years. I will say though that Bill and I did find time and went to the movies for some pure escapism and by escapism I mean, we went to see The AVengers in 3D. It was a lot of a fun and provided some good laughs for the both of us. I know the stories (though there was no Ant Man or Wasp) but Bill didn’t and he had a real good time. After that was a trip to Shop Rite where he had never been before so that was an adventure for him.

We came home, watched some TV before heading off to bed. His mom was feeling well enough for Bill to take her to church, her old church, not the progressive church where he currently goes to from time to time. No the old church is still virulently anti-gay and his mother is comfortable with that, though with Alzheimer’s it’s hard to say what really makes her comfortable.

I finished up a ton of laundry and walked around Hoboken for a spell, reading and enjoying a cigar on the crowded Hudson River walkway. I came home after a while and didn’t do much but watch the clothes dry on the racks throughout the apartment. On his way home, Bill called from the Holland Tunnel. He rented a car and still had some time with it and asked if I wanted to go joyriding with him. Being a late Sunday afternoon, I couldn’t really say no.

I met him outside the building and soon we were headed west with no particular place to go. We rode to the Lodi/Maywood border on Route 17 and drove around, past the Bergen Mall as I told Bill stories of my youth. How Annemarie used to work at the A&P which is no more, funeral homes and hair salons. We wound up in Paramus, on Century Road, driving past the George Washington Cemetery, making a right on Paramus Road where I showed Bill my old high school. He asked if I wanted to drive through it, but I adamantly said no.

I had plenty of stories to tall so we drove through Fair Lawn to Saddle Brook where I told Bill how I was shipped off to other families for a week at a time, usually hosted by alcoholic adults and their wayward children. Billy & Eileen Hayes, Bud and Trinka Oberele, Pat & Vinny Crowley, Marge Mudrack. ALl names that meant nothing to Bill and even less for e these days, but still are part of my history.

SInce we were in the neighborhood and since it was Mother’s Day, a visit to St. Mary’s Cemetery was in order. It took a few minutes to find the headstone but we found it sure enough. I introduced Bill to the patch of grass under which my parents decompose.

Bill was hungry so it was off to the Saddle Brook Diner for some good food, a few dollars cheaper than it is in Manhattan. Homeward bound, hitting traffic once we approached the Lincoln Tunnel so it was a tour through Union City and Jersey City.

Indeed quality time was spent with Bill. So lovely. We really love each other and deserve each other and maintain a balance which isn’t always easy but we get by.

And it was back to the cigar shack for me which I’d rather not write about since it was so piss poor the first half, but Thomas proved himself to be quite generous since I couldn’t get on base at all. And now I find myself indebted to his largesse.

Rest in peace Donald ‘Duck’ Dunn.

Collapsing New People

I Know You Rider

Friday, May 11th, 2012

So this is day five and this is the wall that accompanies day five. It has been a long day. Started with Bill over sleeping and kissing me goodbye. I asked if he made coffee and he hadn’t since he was running late. Neither of us has been sleeping well so getting up in the morning has been quite a struggle, a pain in the tuchis.

He was out and I was up about a half hour later, shuffle into the shower after making coffee and pouring a bowl of cereal. A conference call at 8AM was scheduled with the big wigs from who knows where. It really did not have anything to do with me but still my telephone attendance was mandatory. Bradley and Zack were at the cigar shack and their presence was felt online.

My presence was not felt so much and at 8:12 I had a text from Zack asking if I was in on the call. I didn’t find the text until 9:30 when the conference call ended and I texted Nimrod back to let him know that I was and couldn’t text and phone at the same time, so take that Mr. Blackberry.

I flitted about the apartment while the drone droned on. I had speaker phone so I wasn’t missing anything really. I got dressed, did my morning business and drank cup after cup of coffee in an effort to stay awake. And I did stay awake through the conference call.

After that, a stop at the bibliotheque where I dropped off some items and picked u-p other items. A walk to the bus stop, ready to head to the Path train should my lately non existent bus did not show again. But it did and it was Chief at the wheel. Long time no see and not much chat between the two of us.

I made it to work and there was Jerry Vale with Zack and the great possum. Braley reaped the benefit of Zack’s largesse today, Jerry Vale and I left to fend for ourselves. And we did an admirable job of fending for ourselves, especially when Zack and Bradley went off for a ‘nooner’. Interpret anyway you’d like.

AT some point in a few weeks, Thomas and Jerry Vale and Bradley and I will have to be in the cigar shack to give a review on Zack and his managerial style or lack thereof. I came up with a line yesterday which some people thought was hilarious. ‘He aspires to be half assed, but as of now he’s merely quarter assed.’

I’ve discussed it with the non marsupials I work with and we’re all a bit cautious and they are advising caution on my part, since I have a way with words and despite being told our reviews would be confidential, people would know it was me who said whatever so I had best be careful. I don’t care right now, and as Bill said, what I say will probably depend on how I get along with Nimrod the day before. I could say he’s great when he’s sober…but how often is that?


09 My Baby

I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)

Thursday, May 10th, 2012

Today has been day four out of five. I’ve already hit 40 hours, tomorrow will make it 50. It’s rough, being on your feet 9 hours a day, then trying to find a place to sit down for as long as possible on your lunch hour. Today was no different, though it did start out differently.

I had to go in an hour earlier this morning and watching the local news, traffic and weather I heard that there was an hour delay in getting into the Lincoln Tunnel. With my track record this week, I made the decision to catch the Path train. After getting myself together, I headed down Washington Street to the Path train.

I knew what side of the train to get on this time, but there was a train in the station already and I was able to score a seat. I sat and read Retromania by Simon Reynolds some more as the train barreled down the tracks. At 33rd Street I got off and got on the Q train heading uptown. It dropped me off a few blocks away from the cigar shack but I didn’t mind since I was early. About a half hour early.

I wandered around the area, got my usual iced coffee and sat outside until the proper time. I was working with Zack and Thomas today and it went well. Zack is great to work with on the floor and we had a lot of laughs. He also threw a few sales my way which helped not just me but the cigar shack in general.

Jerry Vale came in around 2:00 since there was a conference call that Thomas and Jerry Vale had to be in on. I have to be in on the call tomorrow morning at 8:00 but I can do that from home, before heading into the cigar shack. The original plan was for me to be at the cigar shack at that accursed hour, but with the 800 number and the link on the page I can do it from where I am sitting right now, perhaps even wearing what I am wearing right now, or even less.

It was a busy enough day at the cigar shack, the conference call lasted almost 2 hours which delayed my usual lunch by an hour. So it was a bit windy and cloudy when I was finally able to go outside. I heard from Pedro who was planning on coming into the city tonight and wanted me to hang out with him. He called me before 2:00 and I really could not talk at that time.

When I called him on my lunch hour, it was too late for him so he was staying in Otisville. I also heard from Rand who inquired if I would be going down to Asbury Park with him and Lisa as well as Lois and Mike Neutron. I begged off since Bill is also off this weekend and we rarely have the same days off. Plus I have a ton of laundry to do and I wasn’t so keen on driving down the shore, which is weird since I do love going down the shore.

Instead, Bill and I might go see the Avengers movie on Saturday night, which is also something we hadn’t done since January 2011, going to a movie together. My friend Sung might be in town on Saturday and if I have a chance, I might meet him for a coffee.

In any event, I am home now, the alarm clock has been set so I can be reasonably coherent for the conference call at 8:00. One more day until the weekend. I’m sure I can do it.

I hope Mr. and Mrs. Jimmy Seltzer have a good time in France.



Polyrock – Your Dragging Feet