Monthly Archives: April 2009

Born Late

OK, this is what happened today. I wonder if I should start off each entry with ‘this is what happened today’? But then again I do write about the night before so maybe I should write, ‘This is what happened in the past 24 hours’.

Last night was quiet, Bill came home halfway through Lawn Hors d’oeuvre. I wish I caught the whole episode but I watched The Colbert Report after Lost. Lawn Hors d’oeuvre had some very good acting by a Central American actress who was simply heartbreaking at the end.

So damn sad. I think it had something to do with the beating and eventual death of Jose Sucuzhanay who was attacked in Brooklyn in December while walking home arm in arm with his brother after drinking one night. And also the day laborers out in Long Island who were routinely beaten by gangs of white kids. Gripping.

Lost was good last night, and too convoluted to get into here.

Bill was in a weird way, mostly depressed from not getting enough sleep. He’s been using a mask for his sleep apnea and it isn’t comfortable for him, causing him to wake up several times in the night.

With no relief in sleep and the situation with his mother who told him that she wants to die the poor guy is a mess. This morning he sent me a text about how he just wants to cry. He was at work and thats not how he usually goes through his day.

I was waiting for Abby to pick me up when I got the text. Abby told me yesterday that he was going to pick me up at 9:00 to go to Avenel. At 9:00 as I was about to leave, Abby calls.

He said he spoke to the property owner and said we should be there at 10:30, so he was going to pick me up at 10:00 instead.

Now I’m a stickler for time and a sucker for time. No matter how many times I’ve been kept waiting by family members, partners and friends, if they tell me they they will be somewhere like say, noon, I will be there at 11:55.

I always give them the benefit of the doubt.

So at 9:50, I went downstairs thinking that maybe this new guy, Abby will be early. I don’t like to keep anyone waiting you see.

At 10:15 I called Abby to find out what is going on. He told me he was on 50th Street and should be here in 10 minutes. Also the property owner apparently told him anytime after 10:30 was fine, which was not what he originally told me.

He also wondered why I was calling while waiting outside. I told him that we could do the trip some other time.

I had to go to the bank to get some cash and find out when I would be getting my new bank card, and there were things to do in the office that needed to be done today.

I’m probably being a pain in the ass to Vivek and company buy I do have other responsibilities. Responsibilities that are more or less concrete rather than the kind that change with the weather and Vivek’s whims.

I made it into the office and spoke with Greg Stevens before he headed out to the Hamptons. He just laughed at this situation, telling me that these guys run on Indian time. He inferred that Vivek was like a big kid who is used to getting his way, by hook or by crook.

Then it was off to the Hamptons for him.

I did whatever it was I could do in the office, also checked in with Bill from time to time. He took my advice, had a banana in the morning, a salad for lunch and another banana in the afternoon.

When I last spoke to him, he sounded a lot better. Not exactly ‘happy’ but busy enough at work to occupy his mind.

And if you’re in Hoboken on Sunday, and it’s not raining, you should check out Rand’s gate sale which is conjunction with Lois’ gate sale.


It’s also the Art and Music Festival with the headliners being the Box Tops featuring Alex Chilton and also various members of the Feelies in various bands like Yung Wu, Wild Carnation and East of Venus.

Unless it rains.

The Perfect Kiss

Well today was better than yesterday and that’s good. Nice to start off on a positive note. Ending on a positive note is another matter entirely.

The mellowness was from the fact that Vivek and Sanjay were in India and not coming back to the States until Wednesday, meaning they won’t be in until Thursday which is my last day of the week I think.

I say I think because I think Vivek is expecting me to work 5 days a week, which will be nice to get that money again, and also it means that the cleaning of the hallway will be done on Saturday or Sunday.

That’s not so bad. We shall see when Vivek returns.

I had a good talk with Greg Stevens and he was totally supportive of my situation, having dealt with Vivek for a number of years. His advice was very much the same as Annemarie’s and Harpy’s, hang in there. I don’t have much choice but to hang in there.

I’ve been hanging in there for so long that I am considered well hung.

Tomorrow I’m supposed to be going to Avenel with Abby. For what, I don’t know. He’s supposed to be picking me up here in Hoboken so that saves me a commute. That should make for an interesting experience.

I was planning on writing the other day about my driving experiences. I’m giving it a shot tonight. In 1981, a friend of mine, Derry Pedovitch and I had an idea to move to Los Angeles.

Derry had family there and he made arrangements to stay in Canoga Park. Derry had a van and we decided to drive Route 80 to Utah, then whatever highway would take us to Southern California.

It wasn’t that pleasant a trip. The northern route was dull, it took most of a day to get through Pennsylvania, the Pennsylvania Turnpike was a four lane highway, two lanes going east and west.

We made it through to Ohio and parked in a campground in the middle of the night. We were on the road the next day, looking at nothing but corn as we drove though Indiana, Illinois and Iowa.

We slept in Nebraska and I got into a fight with Derry almost abandoning me in Nebraska when the van’s cassette player ate one of my tapes. After that we made it to Utah, sleeping in Beaver.

Then it was onto Southern California, getting a room in Alhambra after sitting in traffic for a few hours. In Canoga Park I found Derry’s family were nice, a little rough around the edges though.

We realized once we got there that everyone travels to Los Angeles to start all over again and we weren’t so special. It was a weird couple of weeks that also included a trip to Las Vegas were I lost all the money I had.

That was also the last time I gambled, not counting playing the lottery. It was one of the stupider weekends in my life.

Our money and dreams were depleted and we headed back to New Jersey, driving the same route, only this time it was nonstop.

I went back to work, and eventually got Derry his job back in the same warehouse. 6000 miles in about a month.

I wouldn’t recommend it, but it did get me the courier position when it became available a few months later.

Derry betrayed me a year or so later and I never spoke to him again.

Headlights Look Like Diamonds

Starting off, I don’t like the new hours. Sure, going to work at 9:00 is nice, less of a rush hour crowd, but leaving the office at 7:00, getting home around 8:00 and then having to make dinner is not my cup of tea.

Maybe I can get used to it, but on day one, I don’t like it.

The day today was a fiasco, even before I got on the bus. As it happened, I was waiting for the bus when Greg Stevens called my cellphone wondering if I was coming in to the office. I told him I was.

Then he asked if I was close to the office and I told him I was still in Hoboken waiting for the bus. He was off to a meeting and needed a letter that Vivek had sent out earlier this month, the letter stating that the company was broke and belly up.

I told him that I should be in the office by 10:00 and if he left me a fax number I would fax the letter over to him. I was there a little after 10:00, I found the letter and faxed it to wherever he was.

The day progressed awkwardly. Basically I was doing the same job as before, only 90 minutes later. Things still needed to be done and the other people in the office weren’t about to do it themselves.

The conservatives were all dressed up for meetings, I was casual since it was going to be close to 90 degrees today.

I got a phone call from Abby this morning as I sat at my desk. He asked if I was going to call the various hotels and motels that were discussed yesterday.

I told him that I still would like some help with this aspect since the people that I was calling had questions that I couldn’t answer, and I too had some questions.

He didn’t seem to hear that and asked again, and I raised my voice telling him that I requested help yesterday when he, Vivek and Sanjay (gave the business partner a name) sat opposite me at the table and all they did was nod their heads in unison, and still nothing was resolved.

I don’t want to look like an idiot and I don’t want the company to look bad.

I told Rand yesterday that it was like the left hand doesn’t know what the right hand is doing, only this was worse since the hands were attached to the 8 arms of Shiva and the left still wasn’t saying anything to the right.

I did what I could, calling up the hotels and motels, and doing my best after Sanjay sat down and we did a phone call together. Still, things didn’t go as smoothly as anyone would have liked.

Some people I called didn’t know anything about what I was calling about and some simply weren’t interested. This was the equivalent of a ‘cold call’ or so they thought.

I heard from Sanjay that this was ordered by a guy who owns several of these hotels and motels, unfortunately the owner didn’t tell the managers of these places.

It was confusion on both ends.

Some people weren’t in, some people were unavailable. I had to keep calling because all of a sudden this needed to be taken care by 6:00 this evening.

‘Let’s give it to the new guy’ must have been the thinking behind that one. I called one motel manager at 4:49, telling him I’d call back in an hour to help him with the questionnaire. At 5:55 the guy’s phone was out of service.

It was truly the essence of ridiculousness.

20th Century Boy

Presently in the phone with Harpy. Blood pressure which is usually low is quite high while talking to him. It all stemmed when for some strange reason I tried giving him a call to let him know the latest developments at work.

Like last week when I wrote I have all these phone numbers in my cellphone and hardly any of them were available. Well, Rand was available and I told him about the latest.

Harpy was unavailable, as was Bill, Annemarie, and everyone else. That’s fine. They have their lives, their problems and I’ve got mine.

What happened was mainly a continuation of last week. Last week was when I started phoning up a few hotels and motels and asking them questions regarding beaming movies to their rooms.

I couldn’t do it all the way through since the people on the other end had questions that I couldn’t answer. Vivek and his business partner and Abby were all unavailable.

Still I felt it best if I went through the questionnaire with one of the three next to me in case there were questions. I told them this today and they agreed.

It didn’t mean they were going to find time to sit there next to me. In fact they still wanted me to call, looking and sounding stupid sitting next to an empty chair. It’s just ridiculous.

But the peak of ridiculousness was when they told me that I would be driving to different hotels and motels to check out the properties. Oh how their faces fell when I told them I didn’t drive.

They offered to pay for driving lessons but I told them I knew how to drive, it’s just that I don’t want to drive. And I don’t have a license.

I am probably one of the few Americans they’ve met who steadfastly refuses to drive.

I explained to them that I used to drive for a living. I drove to California and back. I’ve driven to Florida and back. I drove to Austin, Texas. And twice a day I used to drive from Saddle Brook NJ to 757 Third Avenue, only a few blocks away.

When I had to do an “impersonation of Janet Leigh” for Vivek’s business partner is when I tried calling.

Rand understood. He was my unofficial co-pilot for about a year.

Things have changed since I last drove 23 years ago. More new drivers and more older drivers. It’s not so much I don’t trust them, but the tons of metal are unsafe at any speed.

All it takes is one split second, one thing to go wrong and everything could all go bad.

And I do not want to drive a car or truck or van ever again.

Harpy insisted on telling me over and over that it would be something new to do. That if I want to keep my job I had better start to drive again. Sorry, but if it comes down to that I would rather walk than drive.

And dealing with Vivek and his business partner and Abby is something else entirely. Several times as I sat with them, plans for what I should do change within seconds. ‘John should do this.’ Then ‘John should do that’ which totally conflicts with the initial proposal.

What am I getting myself into? I was also told that I could start coming into the office at 10:00 since Vivek and his business partner don’t usually make it in until noon sometimes.

So they want me to stay later, until 6:00 or 7:00.

Sorry if tonight’s entry is incoherent. I think I should put off talking on the phone until after I’ve written since whatever state of mind I might have been in previously, it’s gone now and I am a bit tense.

The Whole World

Let’s see. At 12:30 this afternoon it was 89 degrees out. On April 26. I can see it being like that in July or August but this makes it seem like we’ve bypassed Spring and jumped right into Summer.

Well you know, that global warming myth. It’s all a scam you see. They say it’s a man made problem, but of course this has happened a few times already. Unfortunately there are no records of the polar ice caps melts, ice shelves collapsing in Antarctica.

Greenland must have been green at some point, why else would it be named Greenland? Too bad Leif Erickson isn’t around to explain that one.

I believe global warming is a fact, and I believe it’s a man made problem. Not so much from car emissions, though that is a factor. It’s from the destruction of the rain forests and what I think no one wants to talk about.

It’s because there are a lot of people exhaling carbon dioxide. A lot more people now than ever before and without major rain forests converting the CO2 to oxygen, we are in the mess and on the slippery slope where we find ourselves today.

I was surprised that one of the people in my office say that she believed global warming was a falsehood. I usually hear that from the conservative blow hards, but that was a surprise and her standing in my view was diminished somewhat.

After having napped and written yesterday, I sat on the stoop in front of my building, enjoying a Padron and sipping on a Guinness. My landlord walked by, apparently he was inside the building.

He said he was planning on calling me since he got the note I sent in February, saying that it was posted on the wall by his phone at home. Now that he had me, he asked if I was still willing to vacuum the hallway in my building.

I told I was and we worked out a deal. He said he couldn’t reduce my rent, but would write me a check each month. I agreed to the deal. Julio says it would be a pain in the ass at first and maybe I could hire someone to do a deep cleaning to start off with, and then my cleaning on top of that would be a lot easier.

It does sound like a good idea. I already started today, sweeping up the front of the building and cleaning out leaves and garbage on the stairs outside that lead to the basement.

Last night was an adventure of sorts. Definitely out of the ordinary. Bill and I headed into the city, I still didn’t have a definite idea on where we were going but I did get an inadvertent clue.

A former co-worker on Facebook, Janelle, wrote that she was taking her mother to dinner for her birthday and after that, taking her to see John Leguizamo. I know Bill loves John Leguizamo so that was the clue.

I did a search for John Leguizamo NYC but all that came up was his IMDB entry. A put that in the back of my mind walking down the gentrified Christopher Street scene. Lot’s of bridge and tunnel LGBT teens hanging out but mostly the gay scene in now in Chelsea.

We walked over to Seventh Avenue South towards the Actor’s Playhouse where I saw a poster for John Leguizamo. I told Bill I guessed it, but not really since we were right on front of the box office.

The show was good, it was a work in progress titled, A Work in Progress- Don’t Hate. Bill loved it of course, laughing uproariously throughout.

One or two times I was the only one who laughed at Leguizamo’s jokes, making him mention that he would wait for everyone else to catch up.

I did see Janelle and her mom and hoped to see them after the show, but it was such a warm night and all the bodies in the Actor’s Playhouse made it like wearing a wool sweater inside, plus the seats were a bit on the small side, not really geared for a 6’2” frame like myself or Bill.

After the show we made a beeline for the street afterwards, hanging out in the fresh air for a few minutes before giving up and heading towards the Path train on Ninth Street where we rode the train up to 33rd Street and then back towards Hoboken so we could get a seat.

By the time the train made it back to Ninth Street most of the people were standing up against one another. Young couples heading home early after getting their drink on.

Bill and I made it back to Hoboken were young patrons were either lined up to get into crowded bars or standing outside of those establishments smoking.

Back home Bill went right to sleep and I stayed up and watched a repeat of Lost that they show on Saturday nights.

Woke up, Bill was on his way to clean out his mother’s apartment, I was off to get breakfast. After that, with the temperature rising, I decided to clean up the front of the building.

Then I fixed up my bike and called Rand and we went cycling up to Guttenberg, as far as the Galaxy Towers. A fun ride, haven’t hung out with Rand in a while.

Lisa stayed home, she doesn’t ride a bicycle lately I guess.

An entertaining couple of hours with an entertaining friend from years gone by. And he’s right.

Lost is better than Heroes.

Pics? Pics!

My buddy Rand

My buddy Rand

Galaxy Towers

Galaxy Towers



34th Street heading east

34th Street heading east



Garbage Peeps

Garbage Peeps

Mellow Mood

Well I just woke up from a nap that I didn’t think I needed, but it turns out that I did. It seemed to shake the cobwebs off my increasingly bitter mind.

I woke up tired this morning and then after getting bagels and whatnot, I got the packages together to ship back to the fraudulent manufacturers. I was so plagued by doubt and self loathing, plus an unhealthy attitude to most of the world.

I had a great talk with Annemarie who did her best to bolster my spirits and I did my best to resist her attempts. She suggested the nap which made sense after I came home.

Last night I mainly sat in the dark until 11:00. Bill came home and tried to be comforting but I was too uncomfortable for that. Even Juan called, somewhat alarmed after reading last night’s entry. And here I was thinking that Juan didn’t read this anymore.

That was awfully nice. It’s funny- a week before, I had an excellent day with Juan. Last Friday, going to Ikea, where I hadn’t laughed like I did in a long time. Even last Saturday, going to Hiro Takeshita’s art opening with Bill was nice.

Somewhere between then and now it all turned to shit, or at least started to.

I do think Bill was disappointed last night when he asked what time we were going to Dan and Shawn’s party in Jersey City this afternoon. I used to work with Dan at Wanker Banker, 5 years ago. He left in 2004.

I told Bill I wasn’t much into going to it anymore, complaining that it would mainly be theater people. As I said that, I remembered that Bill is theater people.

I’d like to think I was more on the fence rather than dead set against going to the party, and I am pretty sure I was dragging my feet about it, going back a couple of weeks ago.

In any event, the invitations and the directions can’t be found at this moment in time. I can’t find it and neither can Bill and I forwarded him the invite a month or so ago.

Well I just searched my gmail trash and there was the invitation, for last Sunday. So all that worry for nothing.

Tonight Bill is taking me somewhere, one of his surprises that he told me about a few weeks ago. He loves to surprise me, loves the whole ‘I ain’t sayin’ shit’ about it. This drives me crazy.

I was thinking we were going to the Rhythm Revue tonight at Roseland that his Stuyvesant Town neighbor told him about. He was hopped up about it and I figured that was it.

I even guessed it, but I was incorrect. Then I figured we were going to Bob Mould’s Blowoff dance party in Brooklyn tonight and I was certainly dreading that. I asked him if we were going to Brooklyn and he said no.

He said we would be taking the Path train to Christopher Street and that was all he was going to say about it. He gave me the chance to ask 2 more questions, but since this was pre-nap I didn’t.

I did ask if we were doing something gay and he said ‘hell no’. So that was a relief.

All I know is that we have to be on our way by 8:30.

Hopefully the fraudulent scheme from these companies is taken care of, after getting Return Authorization numbers and shipping them back via certified mail. It’s amazing what a nap can do.

That’s it. An early posting, way earlier than usual. Thought it best to strike while the iron is hot.

Better, not bitter

Better, not bitter

Seventy Six Trombones

Well it’s Friday. I’m supposed to have Fridays off but here I am in the office waiting for phone calls. I called up Vivek and told him that I was in and waiting to hear from Raj in Pennsylvania.

Vivek made a comment that this job is mine if I want it and I told him I did. I also told him that I think I would be good at it. Basically I would be a salesman. Vivek seemed surprised at my confidence, then made a comment that it would help if I wouldn’t be as moody as I’ve been for the past couple of weeks.

Well as I mentioned the other the other day I was working on it. I’m doing my best to smile as I pick up and throw out used tissues, and to ignore the conservative loud mouths going on a few feet away from my desk.

I’m sure it was inadvertent but Vivek’s words had an undermining effect. But I can’t do anything until I hear from Raj and then ask Vivek or his business partner or Abby and so far they haven’t called despite my attempts to reach them.

And that is making me feel depressed. I did have some plans for fun and whatnot today but those fell by the wayside when I found myself having to come into the office without pay, and also when I found out that Bill was not going to work and was planning on being around the apartment.

That made it just as well that I was going to work. Nothing against Bill of course, but lately I’ve been feeling a bit unmoored.

My gmail box is near full so I’ve been going back and deleting just about everything, going as far back as 2005. In going that far back I’ve found some fun things and some sad things. 2005 was when Bill and I had a falling out and there are some pictures that he had taken to perhaps boost up our relations.

They didn’t have the desired effect. In fact there was little or no desire to be had. 4 years later, it still leaves me bitter.

It’s a beautiful day outside and once again, I ain’t feeling it. Why? because I’ve been sitting in a cube in my office waiting to hear from people who’ve insisted that getting in touch with me is so very important.

Well I’ve left a few messages for these people and haven’t heard a word. The day just gets better from there.

I come home all gloomy Gus, and find 2 packages at my door with my name on it. I ordered some cigars the other day but these did not seem too heavy. Nevertheless, my name was on the packages and I brought them upstairs and opened them.

One package contained weight loss diet supplements, the other had two bottles of collagen for face and body. I didn’t order either of these.

I call up my bank after pulling up my account on the computer and there were 4 charges to my bank card, all done on Monday, April 20, within minutes of each other.

The bank does what they can on the phone and suggest that I go to a branch and cancel my card and have the charges disputed.

I do that and and sit with Antoinette who does what she can, cancels my card and gives me forms with the wrong apartment number. I come home and call these companies. 3 of them seemed understanding and cancelled, the 4th had a dick named Tou in customer service.

They claim that someone must have stolen my card. I ask them how often does someone have a card stolen and have products shipped to the card holder. They tell me they can’t explain the criminal mind.

This guy Tou tells me I have to get a police report and send it in. Once I get off the phone with this idiot, I walk down to the police station and ask to file a police report.

The officer behind the desk tells me they could give me a case number but I wouldn’t be able to get a copy of the report until Monday.

Right now I’m fit to be tied. I really hoped to talk to someone, and with all the numbers in my cellphone, there was no one I could talk to.

Everyone has their own problems and more than likely don’t want to hear about mine.

And I could be writing more but I’m a pussy. I censor myself when I write this blog. And once again I’m leaving it at that.

Action Time Vision

So Happy It’s Thursday again. Yes it’s my Friday. Or is it? It looks like I will be going in to the office for a little while tomorrow.

I now work for a company that supplies movies to hotels and motels. That just happened this morning, not by my doing. The company that hired me is no more.

I still support The Conservative Mortgage Company, That Cancer Research Foundation, The Hulk Investment Company, Investment Consultants Australian for Beer Company, and now the Asian Indian Beamed Movie Company.

Five companies, all contributing to my salary. There might be one or two smaller companies that I overlooked but you get the picture.

So today, Vivek calls me from Washington DC? Pensacola? and tells me something about what I have to do today.

Some Indian dude named Abby called up, telling me that he’s stopping by to see me about what Vivek talked to me this morning. The thing is, Vivek was half asleep when he called and I only understood about 10% of what he was saying.

Abby says he’ll be in the office in an hour. Two hours later he shows up. I get a crash course on what I have to do. Call up various hotels and motels that have signed up for the movie beaming service and ask them questions from two different questionnaires.

That wouldn’t be too difficult. It was eerily similar to a job I had about 20 years ago, working for Rupert Murdoch and helping to build his Hotel Database to Nowhere. But instead of looking at brochures and running off to ingest some powders with coworkers, I’m basically on my own.

Abby had hit the road running off to Washington DC when I finally had a chance to make some calls. Make that call. Midway through while talking to Raj in Reading PA, I realized I was over my head.

I thanked him for his time and mentioned that I would call him back with a few more questions in a day or two. I had some questions of my own to ask but Vivek and his business partner were unavailable, as was Abby.

Actually Abby did call from the road telling me that there was one person that was important to reach today. I called that one person who was quite personable and asked that I email him the questionnaires which he will fill out and fax in tomorrow.

And that’s the basic reason why I will be going in tomorrow. To get a fax and then scan it and send to Seattle. I don’t mind really.

I will just start my laundry tonight and head into the office without any of the daily hang ups. It’s my job now and like Vivek said, the company that hired me is no more and if I want a job, this is the job I should take.

Beaming movies into hotel and motel rooms for $2.99 a day, $3.99 if you want to include adult movies. All the movies are stored in a box and available with the touch of a finger. It’s actually something I am looking forward to.

I saw Matthew Broderick on the street yesterday.

The Time is Now

Exactly, what is it with Wednesdays? At the edge of a funk for me. And for no particular reason. Granted work wasn’t as busy today as it was yesterday.

I did want to smack Tom Chin around today. But I feel like that most days. He made me look like a moron this afternoon. He doesn’t really work as an employee of my rapidly sinking company, he’s a consultant.

I book a room then find he booked it for something else without telling me. So I switch what I booked. Right before Tom Chin’s meeting was scheduled, some of the conservatives start to use the room. I go in there and tell them they have to move.

Luckily we have three conference rooms. I poke my head in Tom Chin’s office to find out what time his meeting is supposed to start and he tells me it was moved. Nothing like some non-communication to get things going to a halt. I looked like an idiot.

Today is Earth Day. A rainy earth day at that. What have I done for earth day? Can’t really say. Can’t really say I’ve ever done anything for earth day. I was probably more inclined when living in Weehawken with William, since he had a garden in the backyard.

I would contribute some banana peels for compost.

My office doesn’t do anything for earth day. We don’t recycle. Paper gets used and wasted. My desk is covered with paper that I’ve rescued to use for scrap paper, but there’s no reason to use scrap paper since there is no real work that would require it.

I spent some time today watching people debate both sides of the same sex marriage issue in Maine. It was interesting to watch.

The pro same sex marriage people speak rationally, heartfelt and with conviction citing legislation and facts. The anti same sex marriage people quote their bibles.

That’s it.

God doesn’t like it. It’s a sin. God will get angry. You will face God’s wrath.

What kind of god is named god? Would you name your son, Male? Boy? Your daughter- Female? Girl? Such a lack of imagination.

Sad to say the anti same sex marriage people seem lesser educated, but they do have their myths to back them up. A few times I heard, ‘You know, 2000 years ago….’.2000 years ago, what? What happened?

It’s basically an issue of love versus hate it seems to me. If a same sex couple that is committed wants to get married and receive all of the benefits of marriage who would get hurt?

Is it basically fear? Or finding comfort in ignorance? I don’t think marriage is for everyone. I don’t even know if it’s right for me. But I do feel that if 2 committed adults want to get married and receive all of the benefits of marriage that opposite sex couples receive, then they should be able to.

What is the big deal? Why can’t parents simply say to their kids when they ask why 2 men or 2 women are holding hands or kissing, why can’t they say, Some men like men and some women like women?

It would probably end the situation right then and there. Kids don’t really care, they just want to know.

Instead you have some young boys, trying to be good, study hard and get called Gay or Fag. So far this year 5 young boys have committed suicide because of bullying from other kids, being called those names.

Their schools failed them. Their families are left with a hole in their lives that could never be filled. Children have to be taught to hate. And it seems like they’re being taught to hate at home and in the churches.


Well today turned out to be quite alright. Greg Stevens returned, no longer working for my company. That would make it 3 employees and there’s only 2 left and I’m the one who’s getting paid.

The day started out threatening to rain but it turned out not to happen despite people walking with open umbrellas, not wanting to be caught, no way, no how.

Very good New Yorker last week. Reading about exotic animals who were brought into this country, mainly Florida, then when they got to be too much to deal with, were released into the wild.

So there is a population explosion of Burmese pythons slithering about down there. Yet another reason, not to go to Florida. Never liked snakes and I’ve never touched one. Same thing with guns. Never liked them and never touched one.

Guns and snakes, two things not to give me for a present. Hope you kept the receipt just in case.

I was a bit busy dealing with Vivek’s business partner on the phone, getting things done for Greg Stevens, and the usual maintenance of the office, which included booking conference rooms and all three were reserved.

That made the conservatives a bit upset since they usually just take any room that’s available and leave it messy. But like Annemarie said, it’s job security to clean up after these do nothings.

One of the conservatives was mouthing off about how President Obama is going to release so ‘terrorists’ in this country. Of course he was stoking the fire, making it sound like Khalid Sheik Mohammad would be selling fresh Kalkalash from a food truck outside the office.

It actually means that they will be tried and held in US prisons and they will stay there if guilty and likely deported if not guilty. This one guy looks like Senator Boehner and seems to get all of his information from Fuck Snooze.

Last night Bill was off doing his reading series and I was home while a maelstrom raged outside. I watched Heroes which was ok. It was mainly about Sylar and it was a bit of a let down. I knew he wouldn’t do anything to Rebel Micah, and his scenes involving Ellen Greene as his mother were good.

But he seems to be going off the deep end in a mostly boring way. And Hiro is really quite annoying, mostly through his Japanese accent. I don’t mind the subtitles but he sounds like a moron most of the time when he’s speaking. Peke pani?

Tonight promises to be quite mellow which is always welcomed. Board of Education election was today and I usually don’t vote in those since I don’t have any kids. But Sheilah Scully asked that I vote, well asked me and her other Facebook friends, so I did.

The polling place is only a hundred yards from my apartment so it was no big deal. I voted for the Kids First slate.

Also moved Casey Chasm closer to my former co-worker, Austin. Perhaps they’ll work something out. I know Casey and the Missus read this here blog, so I hope they realize that the people I work with do not know anything about this here blog. Ya heard?

Really diggin’ that one song from MGMT, which happens to be the title of today’s entry. t

Time to Pretend

After a beautiful weekend weather wise, it’s a definite downer today. Sheets of rain again. It’s supposed to be like this until Wednesday, with the drying out (or so they say) on Thursday.

Last night Bill and I watched a documentary on Leonard Bernstein. Bill had never seen it before, for me it was the second time I think. Bill told me his father had issues with Leonard Bernstein and really had problems with West Side Story.

He felt it was demeaning towards Puerto Ricans, which is too bad since the message is quite powerful and the music of course is still amazing 50 years later.

Then it was bedtime for Bill and eventually me. We never go to bed at the same time.

Didn’t want to wake up and go to work, not in this weather. But I had to of course. Bill was up and running as I shuffled past, making my way into the shower. He was out the door by the time I got out. Had some coffee and cereal and was smart enough to wear an rain coat.

Rode to work, almost done with last week’s New Yorker, making me almost up to date.

After a good talk with my sister yesterday about job security, I decided that picking up used tissues is not beneath me, especially if it means I will still have a job.

So for me, it was picking up snot rags and washing coffee cups that people couldn’t wash for themselves with a smile on my face. I had to get over the fact that the used tissue in the empty tissue box stayed on the conference table most of last week, and the one who put it there simply could not see the two trash cans in the same room.

Yep, that’s how it’s going to be until February 28, 2010.

Casey Chasm was due in today and it was a good thing I cleaned up the conference room. Casey invented something and got it patented. Such a thing it makes you wonder, why hadn’t anyone invent something like this before?

I told Vivek about it a few weeks ago and asked if he’d be interested in meeting with Casey. Vivek said yes, Casey was into it, so it was all about trying to pin Vivek down. Today was the day he was able to be pinned.

I didn’t have any clear idea on what would transpire. Perhaps Vivek would pull out a check book right then and there. That didn’t happen.

What Vivek did was give Casey some good advice on marketing and business presentation. Good advice for free. There is still more work to be done for Casey but he now has an idea in the direction he should be headed in.

Now I’m trying to get Casey together with a former co-worker who has some good ideas on marketing. I’m just putting them together, hopefully they could work things out.

Also today was the Boston Marathon, which my niece Meghan ran in Hooray for Meghan De Carlo, my niece who finished the Boston Marathon with an Official time of 3:19:31! Excellent time, much, much better than I could ever do. Perhaps riding my bicycle I’d keep up, but without wheels she would leave me in the dust.

The whole family is proud of her for this accomplishment. If she runs in the New York City marathon, I will be on the sidelines, egging her on.

All in all, an interesting, out of the ordinary day.

Run For Your Life

Well it’s Sunday again, and it’s been a pretty nice one. Yesterday the temperature almost reached 80 degrees, today it was in the 60’s and noticeably cooler. I was going to go for a bike ride but the bike needs some work so perhaps next week?

I wound up walking around Hoboken, reading the New Yorker near the soccer pitch on the river for about an hour, thats when it started to get a little too breezy for my oh so delicate self.

Last night Bill was around and that was good. Watched 2 back to back episodes of House which I never really watch. It was good, as good as people like my brother Frank says.

After that I decided to do my bit and visit Tunes, the only record store in Hoboken. It was Independent Record Store day. I had problems with Tunes in the past but I got over them.

I wandered around and picked up Mott the Hoople’s Greatest Hits and Me’Shell Ndegeocello’s latest, ‘The world has made me the man of my dreams’. Mott was good, proved to me that they had a few other good songs besides All the Young Dudes (which is an all time fave) and All the Way to Memphis.

Me’Shell was merely ok, venturing further into avant jazz territory than I would like to go. I used to really like her. Peace Beyond Passion is probably her best and worth owning.

As I was browsing, the store’s PA system was playing some music that was really a lot of fun, especially when played loud. As I was checking out at the register I asked what was playing and they told me it was MGMT.

I immediately turned around and picked up a copy. That turned out to be the best purchase of the evening and since Mott and Me’Shell were used CD’s they were cheap. MGMT was full price, but since it was Independent Record Store day, every thing was a dollar less than listed which turned out to be a nice deal.

Came home around 10:00 after spending an hour in Tunes. Plenty of people roaming the streets last night, out strolling Washington Street and enjoying the nice weather.

Came home, Bill was watching Southland which I watched on Thursday night. He walked in on it halfway through then so he was catching up.

After that we gave up on the late news and watched Grey Gardens on HBO. That was in the news all week, interviews Jessica Lange and Drew Barrymore played Big Edie and Little Edie Bouvier Beale, an aunt and cousin of Jackie Kennedy. It was good.

I never saw the Maysles documentary of the same name all the way through. Drew Barrymore was outstanding and stole the movie from Jessica Lange. Ultimately a melancholy movie but worth watching.

That was about all for the night.

My niece Meghan is running in the Boston Marathon tomorrow, in the front groups, not among the hoi polloi. Yes, she’s that good. Her number is 7629 if you feel like tracking the marathon. It kicks off at 9:00AM. Go Meghan! Yeah!

Here are some pics from this afternoon.





Your Sister Can’t Twist (But She Can Rock & Roll)

Well today was an even more gorgeous day than it was yesterday. No Juan today though he did stop by last night. We watched Vicky Christina Barcelona which was good. Not his best and the movie does brighten once Penelope Cruz comes on screen.

Funny how she basically eclipsed Scarlett Johansson. And I had never heard of Bridget Hall before. Don’t know where she’s from. Juan pointed out that Rebecca Hall’s fiancé in the movie was Ted who was Claire Fisher’s boyfriend in Six Feet Under.

The great Patricia Clarkson was in Vicky Christina Barcelona as well as Six Feet Under and I think there were one or two other actors in the movie who also had small parts on Six Feet Under. It was good, but not one of Woody Allen’s best. Bill came in on the second half of the movie, but it didn’t really matter and there was no need for him to be caught up.

After that ended Bill was off to bed and Juan was heading back to Union City. I was soon fast asleep I woke up early, around 8:15 and did my Saturday morning thing, bagels and newspapers. Got Bill some bagels as well. He likes to toast them in the oven until they are almost charred.

Whatever works I guess.

I decided to head into my office and clean the bamboo shoots. They’re contained in vases by the windows in one of the conference rooms and after a month and a half they start to get covered in algae. I like to come in on a Saturday since it’s a messy thing, cleaning the vases, scrubbing the rocks and cleaning the shoots.

An added bonus is the fact that no one is in the office on Saturdays. As I was scrubbing who should appear but Vivek. He and his business partner were in for a conference call at 1:30. Vivek phoned the other day when I was in my blue mood and wanted to know what was wrong.

I didn’t want to talk about it with him, not then at least. He saw the opportunity to talk to me today after their conference call which should have been over at 2:00. At 2:45 I left a note saying that I had to get back to Hoboken.

Nice walk across town, enjoying a cigar and taking surreptitious photographs of various people. I had a nice call with Annemarie while I rode the bus. I never have phone conversations on the bus but this time I simply didn’t care.

Anne recommended seeing the Love Guru which I was surprised to hear her recommend. She liked it enough, telling me how it was really funny in some scenes. I told her if it was on cable I would watch it, but I wouldn’t rent it.

It looked terrible and even the giant poster that advertised the movie in Times Square was another deterrent to seeing it.

Bill and I met up in Hoboken and we checked out my friend, Hiro Takeshita’s art exhibit at the Hoboken Historical Museum. I’ve known Hiro for about 25 years. He lives on the second floor of my first apartment building at 2nd and Madison.

His latest medium is/are cut outs which are quite intricate and beautiful. Nice turn out at the museum, lot’s of familiar Hoboken faces that I’ve seen for a long time but never knew their names. Still don’t mainly though I did get the name of one familiar busy body, Marion who used to be the court clerk.

I sort of remembered her from when she rented videos from a video store I worked at. That’s how I remember a few faces, from the video store. ‘Oh that’s the guy who rented Butt Bongo Fiesta’, ‘She’s the woman who rented Ghost every weekend for six months.’

Can’t put a name to the face but I do remember their viewing habits and fetishes.

Here’s some pics of Hiro Takeshita’s art exhibition

click to embiggen

click to embiggen






Me, Hiro Takeshita, & Bill

Me, Hiro Takeshita, & Bill


Well today is 180 degrees from yesterday and I mainly owe it to Juan. He didn’t make it by last night, I figured it would be too late. He planned on showing up around 11:00, that meant more than likely showing up around 11:30, after finding a parking spot. So we decided to meet up today.

I just hung out last night, not doing much of anything, not even turning on the TV until Keith Olbermann which I then ignored basically. Bill came home, very tired. By that time my mood had lifted considerably. I knew avoiding most everyone would do the trick.

I did watch Southland which replaced ER. I was initially resistant to it, mainly due to the ad campaign, but I did watch the first episode last week and found myself getting into it. I watched the news and the Simpsons and even part of Scrubs before turning in.

Bill said that I was snoring pretty loudly last night which I guess could be attributed to my bad mood. I felt I slept really well and woke up to Bill kissing me good bye after which I fell back asleep, not getting out of bed until 8:30.

I had some coffee and cereal after showering and wondered what would be a good time to call Juan when all of a sudden, Juan was calling me. He had just woken up and wanted to vent and then go to Ikea.

He vented about some parental troubles then we headed to Ikea. I hadn’t been there in a few years. Juan was hilarious as usual. It was a great day anyhow. Ikea is by Newark Airport and I still get a thrill out of seeing tons of metal flying off and coming in.

How can anyone not be impressed? It hasn’t even been that long since the Wright brothers flew their plane at Kitty Hawk NC.

Right now it doesn’t look like I will post tonight.

I keep getting a message from Word Press, Fatal error: Call to undefined function: preg_replace() in/home/randy/www/ on line 982 and having written that, it seems to be back up so you will be reading this tonight.

I hope the 5 of you are happy.

I would have said 6 but I don’t think Juan reads this anymore.

Rand just called. He’s Mr. Aces tonight. He upgraded my Word Press account and fixed that fatal error. Rand is having an impromptu family gathering with mojitos. Salud Hoppes!

It was weird for a few minutes. Writing and it not going anywhere. What is this? A diary?

Julio and Stine just got a new car. A Volkswagen Passat. It’s good for the family, so I guess they’ll be keeping Alexander, and that’s a good thing since it increases their familial value. So after I write this, my plan is to go downstairs and enjoy a cigar and look at the car.

It’s a beautiful night and I wouldn’t mind sitting there watching whomever strolling down Park Avenue.

I picked up a Saint Luis Rey Robusto and it’s a good cigar, if you’re into that sort of thing. I hope you have a good night. Spell check doesn’t recognize johnozed and suggested Johnnycakes. Johnnycakes!

Down in the Depths

The day is Thursday. Oddly enough it’s been a bright and sunny day. Me, I’ve been morose at best.

It was most noticeable this morning while walking to the office in midtown Manhattan. The day started off kind of depressing. Nothing in particular but then again everything in particular. Perhaps it’s all from waking up on the wrong side of the bed, but then again if that was the case, everyday would be like today.

And it isn’t like this everyday..

What happened? Let’s see, I was almost hit by a Coach USA bus in midtown. The driver insisted he was in the right since the Don’t Walk sign started flashing as I was midway through the intersection, enabling him to justify almost killing me.

Flipping him the middle finger didn’t bring the satisfaction that it used to. I got the bus number, but not the ‘How’s My Driving?’ 800 number. Took a picture of it but by the time I got to my office I stopped caring. What is it with bus drivers? Why are they such an unruly sort?

Shortly after the bus incident, I walk past some guy with what appears to be Tourette’s Syndrome screaming quite loudly either at me or in my direction. So that is basically the start of my day.

My sister seemed to pick up on my blue mood 3000 miles away. She suggested taking a walk to clear my head, but having walked from 50th Street and Third Avenue to 30th Street and Sixth Avenue and then from the Path train to Sixth and Park in Hoboken didn’t clear my head to begin with.

I think staying in and not seeing anyone is the perfect remedy.

Last night after vacillating back and forth about whether to go out, I went out. I walked up to the Whiskey Bar a little after 9:00 and saw my friend John Williams play in his band, The Caterpillar Book.

Why the Caterpillar Book for a band name? I couldn’t tell you. They were good, competent musicians, John was a tasteful guitarist.

They write their own songs which made it odd to see them at the Whiskey Bar since it’s mainly a place where cover bands play. Pearl Jam & U2 tribute bands, but on Wednesday nights, bands playing originals are welcome.

The Caterpillar Book is pretty much a Jersey Shore band, good but a little too AOR for my tastes. But like I said they were good, but not my cuppa.

I also got carded at the door by a handsome cugine who could have been my son if not for the bulging muscles in the tight black t shirt and the black hair straight out of Bensonhurst.

I know this blue feeling, or period, won’t last and will probably be gone by tomorrow.

My three day weekend begins with laundry and then who knows?

I hope to get some bike riding in. Don’t know where to or how far but if the weather is permitting, that is what I might just do.

Right now I’m just glad to be home, away from people.

Ha! Juan just called, he might be stopping by. He’s not people.
"How's My Driving?" The bus that almost ran me over.

The bus that almost ran me over. “How’s My Driving?”

Johnny Du Lump

Back from work on this Wednesday. Everyone at work is getting on each others nerves. I guess it might be attributed to the fact that it’s tax time. I spent most of the day trying to be busy.

At one point I went out for one of my own errands which threw the office into disarray. I was gone for about 45 minutes and got a few phone calls asking if I had gone home for the day.

When I got back Vivek’s partner gave me a check for $8,000. He needed the cash and wanted to know if he should make it out to Cash or to me.

I told him cash since I didn’t have $8,000 for the check to clear. They weren’t going to give me the cash, not without something in my bank account. Something like $8,000.

Heard from Annemarie. She and her husband had driven down to Oakland CA to see Leonard Cohen. I wrote about the fiasco in getting the tickets and she wound up getting 2 pair. Luckily she was able to sell the extra set of tickets.

She said it was a wonderful show and that old Mr. Cohen was in fine form, playing for 3.5 hours. Not bad for a 74 year old geezer. I just can’t get into Leonard Cohen. I’ve tried but can’t seem to connect. I enjoy other people’s versions of his songs.

I really enjoyed the movie, I’m Your Man with Rufus and Martha Wainwright, Nick Cave, U2 and the dreaded Antony singing his songs at a show in Australia. I’m always willing to give Lenny another chance though.

Last night was a mild night. Bill came home just after Lawn Hors d’oeuvre SUV. It was a pretty good episode, touching on the case of the Austrian woman who was held captive for years by her father and sexually abused by him.

Today was also the Tea Bagging day. I was willing to participate and do some tea bagging myself, but it only works if someone is with you and I couldn’t find anyone willing.

I did try to see how the other tea bagging parties were going on around the country but couldn’t find any examples. Perhaps if I get a chance later I will check on X tube and catch some footage of frottage and tea bagging.

Or I can just watch John Waters ‘Pecker’ again and watch the tea bagging scenes there, with Martha Plimpton yelling ‘Trade is my life!’.

Not John Waters best in my book. That would be Hairspray which is a desert island movie for me.

Tonight I may go see an old friend of mine, John Williams play with his band, The Caterpillar Book. They’re playing at the Whiskey Bar which used to be Live Tonight and before that, The Beaten Path.

John used to play bass with the Cucumbers and was the chief technician at Skyline Studios where we both worked.

The funny thing is, I had seen the Cucumbers a handful of times, but I guess that since Jon and Deena were the front line, I didn’t pay much attention to the rhythm section. Lost is on at 9:00 which is when The Caterpillar Book is scheduled to go on.

I’ll record Lost and check out the band. That’s the plan.

Monkey Man

Well today is Tuesday and it’s been an odd day. Not as busy as I thought and no trip to the Indian consulate. Last night was Heroes with special guest Diana Scarwid who played the grown up daughter of Faye Dunaway’s Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest. It was an ok episode.

That was followed by Keith Olbermann hosted by the other guy since Keith Olbermann was at the Mets opening game. I caught some of that when it was on at 8:00 but wound up playing guitar during that so I didn’t really pay attention.

Bill was off to bed a little while after that, leaving me with the news which was all about New York City getting a new Archbishop. That was almost enough to put me to sleep. Almost enough which was enough to make sleep really easy.

Waking up was easy too. Bill was up and getting ready as I shuffled past him to get to the shower. The shaving gel I used to use is no longer available so lately after putting conditioner on my goatee and stubble I use soap and water which does the job.

Bill was gone by the time I started getting ready. I was soon out on the street heading towards the bus stop. Read an interesting article on George Orwell in the New Yorker. Very entertaining and I found comfort in the adage that writers are contradictory by nature.

Once again the day was spent trying to be busy, finding things to do. I found an article that a former coworker from McMann and Tate was being sued for calling his former assistant HIV Boy. I knew this guy, worked around him for 9 months.

He’s a gruff and blustery bloke but never fund him to be homophobic and certainly not stupid enough to say things like that. He told me that the 24 Hour Party People movie was true to life for him, being a club goer in Manchester/Madchester when the Hacienda was going strong.

I went so far as to post that he wasn’t a homophobe on both the New York Daily News and the Post comments section. Not in my name, or this nom de blog, but my old sock puppet’s name.

I also friended him on Facebook. I’m pretty sure it’s a frivolous lawsuit and he’s a stand up chap, that Dean Crutchfield.

Other than that, it’s been another chilly gray day with rain. Not much going on. I have less than a year left at work.

This is my 1,245th entry which I think is fairly impressive. Almost everyday I’ve posted at least 500 words. Now it’s part of my life, so much that if I don’t write, I feel like something is wrong.

I do enjoy it, and never expected it to be such a part of my life. It hasn’t gone the way I envisioned it, but then again I really didn’t have much of a vision to do anything except to write at least 500 words.

I think Rand might have had a vision on what I should do, every day a new piece of fiction, but fiction is hard. I should write some fiction again soon.

I’ve only done it a handful of times on this here blog. An idea pops into my head every now and then.

The latest was a story about Lois DiLivio who wakes up one morning with platinum blond hair.

Somewhere down the line I suppose.

In the Ditch

It’s a Monday and all is ‘meh’. Just one of those days. Last night was quiet as well. Bill came home after 2 church services, dropped off his mother with Elsie and Andy Capp and came home depressed and in need of a nap.

He napped for a few hours and then I woke him up around 7:00. Our usual show on Sunday nights, 60 Minutes was late due to golf and that gave me an opportunity to watch a Bill Moyers rebroadcast from Friday about Abraham Lincoln with Sam Waterson and a Lincoln scholar.

Since Bill had just woken up he was confused that 60 Minutes wasn’t on and hearing Sam Waterson’s voice thought Lawn hors d’oeuvre was on. He soon got into Bill Moyers though.

After that, The Simpsons which was as good as expected. Worst Couch Gag ever! Bill wasn’t feeling King of the Hill. Maybe he doesn’t like Tom Petty and is more of a Billy Bob Thornton fan.

We watched some of Metallica’s induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, more ugly women in his eyes though there were no women on stage. Jeff Beck, Jimmy Page, Ronnie Wood, Metallica, Flea and Joe Perry all on stage playing Train Kept a Rollin’ at the same time. It was a bit much, but over within minutes.

I told Bill the tale about how Metallica took over the recording studio I worked at for a few months and how they treated us all nicely. Food for days, weeks and months. Generally they were alright, though Kirk Hammett and Jason Newsted were outgoing and willing to talk to the common folk, Lars and James were aloof at best.

Once again the people around them were obnoxious, the band themselves were ok. Q Prime is their management. A room full of wankers, one of whom got into an argument with me and threatened to have Metallica leave and go to another studio.

I knew that wasn’t going to happen and called him on it. He never called again.

Bill and I then watched an early episode of Lawn hors d’oeuvre: SVU which was good. Well paced and ended leaving us hanging and wanting more. Then Bill went to bed and I stayed up watching Peter Gomes, the Harvard theologian at a book signing from 2007.

I could listen to Peter Gomes talk all night. He was on a book tour for his then current book, The Scandalous Gospel of Jesus. Entertaining and informative, I would love to have dinner with him sometime. It would be enlightening. Even Luis Buñuel counted clergy as friends despite his atheism.

Off to work today. Vivek came back from Mexico and of course didn’t show up until an hour before I left. He sounded like hell and in turn he said I sounded hungover, which I wasn’t. Hardly anyone was in the office and that made the day crawl by.

4:30 couldn’t arrive soon enough so I left at 4:15. Tomorrow I have to go to the Indian consulate for Vivek and get a work visa for someone coming in from India.

That should be interesting. Never been to the Indian consulate before.

I Am the Walrus

Easter Sunday. That’s today. Apparently a big deal. It’s just another Sunday for some, a major religious holiday for others. It’s a big holiday for Bill, since he’s the religious minded one in our relationship.

Last month he asked me if I wanted to go to services with him and his mother at church and I figured why not. He’s always mentioning how his church friends always ask about me so I decided to show up. Bill’s mother was able to make it.

She’s now ensconced at Bill’s cousin Elsie’s apartment. He knows better than to deal with Andy Capp, and so far so good. His mother seemed alright at the church. She was obviously welcomed and looked after.

Bill is a Deacon in his church so that meant midway through the service he had to go and hand out the bread and the wine. It was a full house and unlike the catholic ceremony where you have to go and get it yourself, here they brought it to you on a silver platter and it gets passed down the pew.

It was the usual length for a service, a little over an hour. This was interesting for me, when the Pastor started his sermon I immediately went heavy lidded.

I remained awake and it was a fairly interesting sermon but like in the past when I used to attend mass, meaning when I was forced to attend mass, I would invariably drift off when the priest would sermonize.

And this guy was more interesting than the sermonizers I had when growing up. Except for Reverend Pat at Bill’s former church, Metropolitan Community Church. The LGBT church.

She was a fired up pastor and usually politicized her sermons which always got my attention. But Bill doesn’t go there anymore and neither do I, obviously.

Bill and his mother were staying for the next mass as well. Deacon duties you see, plus his mother can’t get enough church.

I walked from 85th street and Park Avenue down to 42nd Street and Eight Avenue, enjoying the sunshine and smoking a Padron.

Quite a few people on Park Avenue dressed up and either going to or coming from their respective churches. I crossed over to Madison Avenue when Park started getting crowded, then over to Fifth Avenue when Madison Avenue was getting crowded.

I had an idea to check out the Easter Parade on Fifth but when I saw the crowds headed towards it I had a change of mind. Walked down Sixth Avenue then over to the bus terminal, timing it so I would only have to wait for a few minutes for the bus back to Hoboken.

Came home and turned on the news which was all about the ship captain that was being held hostage off the shores of Somalia was freed. Didn’t end well for the pirates though. 3 of them killed, one captured by the US Navy.

Here is a link to an informative article from the Independent in the UK about the climate that has created these Somali pirates.

Cut n’paste if you will….

I am the Eggman

I am the Eggman

They are the Eggmen

They are the Eggmen

I Am the Walrus! G'oo G'oo G'Joob!

I Am the Walrus! G'oo G'oo G'Joob!

Stand and Deliver

Not sure about writing today, didn’t do much of anything except to watch the rain fall. Bill and I stayed in comfy and cozy. I hadn’t left the apartment until 4:00 this afternoon when it stopped raining. Bill was off to the city and I was headed to the supermarket.

Wasn’t too crowded at the store and most of the employees are new high school students talking to each other while hitting the scanner. ‘Why isn’t anyone going to Prom?’ was the topic and I passed through the check out.

Right now it hasn’t rained for two hours. I may go out for a walk after I eat. Cleaned up a bit in the apartment so some progress was made. Still the mountain looms.

On this date in 2006 my time working at Wanker Banker was winding down. I was relatively confident at the time that I was making the right move, since things had gone south for me there. I was still well liked but things had changed and I had no support from management.

They couldn’t get rid of me, but they wouldn’t make it pleasant for me, going so far as to pay my assistant twice as much as I had gotten for a bonus. Luckily some co-workers heard about this and were upset and a collection was taken and I wound up with some extra extra cash in my pocket.

A week later from April 11, 2006 I knew I was in the fire after jumping from the frying pan.

On April 11, 2007 I was all about Mormons. This was before knowledge of their financing Prop h8 in California for the 2008 elections. I’m pretty sure they were starting to mobilize their followers and their tithing.

I was working at Golden Staffing, or rather getting ready to leave there. My two weeks notice was ending and I was moving onto the Titanic. Golden Staffing was alright but too small. My sister was right, I had worked at two different staffing agencies and I didn’t like it.

Of course I protested saying that this time was different. It was different somewhat. The other two staffing agencies were a bit larger, this was smaller, six people mainly. And it was run by Naomi who was the matriarch.

Nice person but she would have no problem having you removed from the picture. For a few weeks I proofread their website re-writing and tweaking various bits. One thing I remembered was their adage, Never accept a counter-offer.

When I told Naomi and Co. I was leaving, she made me a counter-offer, which I reminded her that her website advises against such a thing.

April 11, 2008 was a good one. A lot of sentences that I had picked up from the television playing behind me. It certainly confused a few people. Not much for Dada, or Surrealist poems in these here parts, ma’am.

An extremely good value, in good times shoppers want a bargain. Wouldn’t you say? In Riverside they tell me, those voices. Was Beckett right in what he wrote? Was he one for great leases and low financing or was he merely a termite?

In between bouts of writing he was known to chew on a house every now and then you know.

And that’s it for something.

Friday I’m in Love

It’s a Friday and it’s been rather a ho hum Friday. Nothing much at all to report. The highpoint of the day so far has been laundry and that was over before noon. I saw Stine and gave her 3 copies of Architectural Digest which I’ve been receiving lately somehow.

I haven’t subscribed since I never even look at Architectural Digest in the newsstand, much less bring a copy home. It was all Stine, no Alexander. He was in the bedroom and Stine was hoping he would take a nap.

Today was a cloudy, gray day, always on the verge of raining, which it didn’t do until I went outside. I was prepared and carried an umbrella. I saw Martin Kelly where he works at CVS.

He told me he had been there since 5:00AM. I asked if he’s getting overtime and he’s not since he’s only working till 1:00PM. That’s the kind of day it’s been. I’m reporting on Martin Kelly’s day.

Today is Good Friday which is a big day in the catholic world I was brought up in. Stations of the Cross was a highlight. I was so enamored of the stories when I was growing up that for a few years I always expected the sky to go dark and the earth to shake around 3:00 which was the time I was told by my teachers that Jesus died on the cross.

Of course it never happened, they were just stories. For a couple of weeks before Holy Week at St Francis de Sales we had to go to church on Fridays and go through the Stations of the Cross. It usually took an hour or so to get from the start to the finish.

Always a drama and for an imaginative kid like myself I was entertained while repeating the lines along with the rest of my classmates. Despite all that, Easter was always a letdown. No ‘real’ presents to speak of. A suit jacket and some polyester slacks from Robert Hall usually and for me it was torture.

I certainly wasn’t one to dress nicely back then, remember this whole getting dressed up in a suit and tie is relatively new, at least for the past 10 years. 30 years or more I was just grumpy and had to be told to tuck in my shirt constantly.

Still my appearance was close enough to make my mother feel good.

The Saturday night before Easter was usually spent dyeing eggs using Paas egg coloring kits and rub on stickers. 2 baskets full of candy and chocolate and eggs would usually sit on the credenza for a week as the milk chocolate bunny gradually was nibbled and torn away by unseen culprits.

Tiny chocolate eggs wrapped in foil wound up in pockets, hopefully eaten before body temperatures melted them

Photographs would be taken in front of the forsythia bush, me and my siblings and occasionally some neighborhood kids also dressed in Easter finery.

This year I am going with Bill to his church for Easter services.

I already know what I’m going to wear, now all I need is a forsythia bush.

Cool for Cats

Wow. I was a basket case. I was certainly surprised at the depth of my Gmail addiction. I was totally lost without it. It is where all the comments for this blog go through and the main point of contact for me.

I was very pissed off about it and was even told by my brother Brian, that that was too much information despite spelling it as ‘pist’ on Facebook.Maybe I should have written psst. It was supposed to have taken 24 hours to access it again.

My sister sent me an email to the Gmail account, asking if I was still having problems with Gmail. If I was, I wouldn’t have gotten that email.

Around 10:00 this morning I was able to regain access. In February Rand told me that my Yahoo mail was compromised and to change my passwords. The same password I was using for years had to be change and old habits do die hard.

I think mis-entered the password a couple of times effectively getting locked out. And Gmail is tough with passwords. When did you start using Gmail? Were you sent an invite for Gmail? Who sent it to you? Give 5 email addresses that you email often. Things like that.

It wasn’t the 24 hour lock out I anticipated and was quite happy to be back in the thick of it. My behavior was a bit on the ridiculous sided.

I was having a slight meltdown when there is Bill dealing with his mother’s Alzheimer’s which is definitely a much bigger issue. Bill was quite supportive throughout the meltdown. Perhaps it was a welcome distraction to his problems.

Bill knew it wasn’t the end of the world. I didn’t have a clue.

Work was quiet and easy enough for me to leave around 2:30 this afternoon. My people were out and most of the other occupants in the office were out due to the holiday where the angel of death flies over peoples houses and kills the first born son, Passover.

I always thought that was cool when growing up, even though I didn’t want my brother Frank to die. I wondered if people actually painted their doorway with lamb’s blood like in the bible. I was disappointed to find it not to be.

10 years ago I lost one of my best friends ever, my cat Zed. I first got Zed in 1984 from the ASPCA. One night while living in my first apartment at 201 Madison, I was making a mix tape.

I had my records spread out, a glass of soda positioned nearby when I saw a mouse. Up went my knee spilling soda all over me and the records and everything else in the room.

I called up my friend Martha Keavney who had a cat named Ivan and asked if I could borrow him for the evening. She brought Ivan over and the cat cried and caterwauled all night not giving me much sleep and probably kept the mice awake too.

The next day I realized that I needed my own cat. I never had a cat before and never considered myself to be a cat person. I found time in between driving from Saddle Brook NJ to 757 Third Avenue in Manhattan to head up to the ASPCA.

I found an older orange and white cat that seemed ok and filled out the paperwork. When it came time for me to get the orange and white cat, the cat spit and hissed, It seemed like the cat from hell.

Directly below that cat was another cat. A black paw reached out and grabbed my pant leg. I looked down and the cat looked up and meowed. We connected.

I asked if I could change my mind and the woman who was helping me grumbled and tried to dissuade me by saying there was more paperwork. I told her that I didn’t care I was taking this little guy.

Obviously we hit it off and became good pals. It wasn’t easy raising a cat since I never had one before. But Zed loved me and I loved him.

For fifteen years Zed was by my side, in various apartments that I lived, even moving up to Lodi for a few months after my mother died. I had to keep Zed in the basement since my father loathed cats.

Poor Zed, stuck in the basement. He spent a lot of time on the cellar stairs trying to get to where the people were on the other sde of the cellar door.

My father swore that Zed was trying to kill him since Zed wouldn’t move when my father went down the stairs to do laundry.

Who knows? Maybe Zed was trying to kill him.

After a few weeks of that, my father had Zed banished to the backyard which was tough since Zed only had limited experience with the outside world and there was also a rabid raccoon scare at that time.

But my father didn’t care. He hated cats. Eventually I moved out of Lodi after 3 months and moved to Weehawken where Zed was welcomed and loved by my roommate William. It was a good run for Zed from 1991 to 1999.

Lot’s of room to roam and also lot’s of fun to be had. Zed started to get ill in March of 1999, around the same time I had gotten my first computer from Harpy. I do think deep down that Zed thought he was going to be replaced by a computer but then again he was 15 years old and starting to have seizures.

It was sad to see him deteriorating. One night in April, I knew he was going fast and I held him in my arms as he passed away. I was devastated and couldn’t believe it even though my cat died in my arms and was now in a shoe box.

I had to ask William to check to see if Zed was dead since I was in such a state of denial. William confirmed what I tried to deny. The next morning I was in the backyard digging Zed’s grave.

I was working at Arista Records at the time and I couldn’t get anything done. All I could do was cry. Suzanne Savage my boss was most sympathetic, and allowed me to leave early. I went back home and sat in the backyard. I had a Guinness and poured one out for my homey.

Then I went inside and cried making guttural sounds that I had never heard before. I could never get another cat, or a dog since I couldn’t go through that again.

If I had a cat or dog that died the day after I died, that would be fine. But I couldn’t go through that heartbreak again.

I had an Irish wake a few days later, Rand and Lisa, Martha and a few other friends stopping by for drinks and reminiscing. I moved on soon after that and moved from Weehawken a few years later. Still, occasionally I can feel Zed’s presence when I sometimes lie in bed drifting off to sleep.

I swear I can feel his presence, Zed curling up behind my bended knees as I lay on my side. It’s always a good feeling. He’s out in the universe somewhere probably, waiting for me.

I still miss him so very much.

These sketches were done by my friend Doug Maxson who cat sat for me back in the day.



This was done by Denise Donnell


Ugh. What a day. Some of it could be blamed on last night. Drinks and some noshes with Pedro did my head in later in the night. I fell asleep at a decent hour and slept ok I guess. Well not really since I was a bit drunk.

Woke up ok. Bill kissing me goodbye, me sleeping until 6:30 which is better than the 7:15 that it’s been the past couple of days. Not enough milk for cereal but enough for coffee. It was in the 30 degree range this morning and an occasional snowflake drifted down to the ground.

The office was buzzing along though I felt like I was invisible. I said good morning to the usual drones and didn’t get anything said back to me. I didn’t care but I did notice so maybe I cared a little bit. Vivek was off to Mexico leaving me with a few tasks to do, including an errand down to 28th and 7th Avenue.

That warranted a subway ride to 28th street then a walk across town. I decided to walk back, listening to Simple Minds. Got back to the office feeling ok but as I waited for the final hour of the day to be over I started to feel tired.

Nevertheless I walked back across town to the bus terminal, enjoying a Padron. Got on the bus which wasn’t crowded at all but right in front of me a woman complained to another passenger across the aisle and loud enough for me to hear that ‘it smelled like someone was smoking a cigar here’.

I just sat and read the New Yorker. Went to Empire Coffee at 4th and Bloomfield in Hoboken. My old pal Jeff wasn’t there. They cut back his hours so maybe today was one of the days that were cut.

Then it was office to the supermarket where there was a girl with a pierced face, dressed all in black with purple extensions in her dyed jet back hair to compliment the gigantic platforms she clod hopped around in. Ever since the demise of Farfetched I have no tolerance for Goth brats.

Came home very tired. Could barely stay awake during Harpy’s Heckle and Jeckle impersonation. He does both parts.

Tired to access my gmail account but it tells me my password is wrong. I enter it again same message. I go to help which tells me it will send my information to my Verizon email account, which I haven’t used in years since I no longer use Verizon.

I don’t even remember my Verizon log in name and gmail asks when I started my account. What month and year. I guess and say February 2004. Still no access.

My other gmail account is fine and despite me contacting gmail telling them to send it to that working gmail account. Now I am tired and frustrated and trying to write at least 500 words. Yes, I am hitting that wall while going back and forth trying to see if gmail is of any assistance to me.

Basically I am pissed off. The latest message from the lack of help department of gmail is that it may take 24 hours to get me a new password. That is infuriating. I use Firefox and the password is saved in my browser and somehow it’s wrong. I am now suffering from gmail withdrawal.



On The Run

Well it’s 4:41 on my computer and 4:44 on my desk phone. I am still at work, killing time until Pedro calls. He phoned a few minutes ago, on the West Side Highway heading downtown to get his haircut.

I expect to hear some questions about what am I still doing here. So far no one asked, but then again most of ‘mi gente’ aren’t here at the moment. Pedro just phoned. His alternate spot is out of business.

He’s about to check another spot. So I may be here for another hour. Who knows? He has a plan to go to his ex-girlfriend’s place of work, a Puerto Rican restaurant on east 57th Street. I’m sure I can hang in there.

Last night I watched Keith Olbermann who had a nice touching item about his mother who passed away on Saturday. Not morose, but sweet.

Bill came home during Heroes and we watched it, or rather I watched it. Bill was busy reading his Bus Ride magazine which is almost like porn to him.

It was an okay episode, 3 left for the season which seems to be enough for me. After that I asked what he wanted to watch and he said the NCAA Finals. So we watched that, or rather he watched it.

I occasionally glanced. Couldn’t really root for either team, Michigan State or North Carolina, both were admirable.

I came up with a movie idea though.

A college basketball player, going to a tough school. He’s quite good at the game but his studies have been lacking. The school is tough enough not to give him a pass and he keeps failing his finals. Somehow he signed up for quantum physics.

So he stays for a couple of years, unable to graduate and unwilling to drop out. He continues playing basketball and the school routinely has been winning each year. His skills have increased on the court and he’s basically playing ‘professional’ ball while in college.

Eventually he hits the books and crams and gets his masters in quantum physics. He then accidentally invents a machine (or something) which enlightens the world. Unfortunately the enlightenment happens 1000 years before it actually should. This causes problems.

The world has arrived at ‘peace’ but without learning the lessons it should have learned in the interim. The basketball player has to get it together and figure out what to do to make things right. I think there was a little bit more to it but I can’t remember what it was right now.

Still in the office, things have been quiet. Vivek is supposed to be flying to Mexico. He offered the use of his condo to me and Bill this summer. I don’t think so. Nice to offer it anyhow.

10:23 Just got home. Had a great time with Pedro as I usually do. I play the role of Father Confessor I guess. Anything on his mind, he feels comfortable to unload on me. I don’t mind. After over 20 years of being his buddy, I’m more than willing to oblige.

A few beers a few shots and all was well. It certainly wasn’t as raucous as previous get togethers. It was all about love tonight and it was good. He’s a good man and I’m proud to call him my friend.




So Hard

So last night, Bill was at St. Luke’s / Roosevelt Hospital being tested once again for sleep apnea. He had to wear that mask thing, which if you remember the Sopranos, Uncle Junior had to wear one for a few episodes. Not the most comfortable thing to sleep in.

Bill likened it to sticking your head out of the window of a moving car and trying to breathe. He should be coming home tonight so I’ll be getting the whole story.

His mother is not being moved to the nursing home on Roosevelt Island after all. She had a panic attack on Friday when they told her and she then had a panic attack which led her to wind up in the cardiologist unit since her heart started beating irregularly.

She is now going to be staying with Bill’s cousin and her husband Black Hitler. The bright side of that is the fact that Bill knows what he’s getting into this time.

This morning without Bill not being around to kiss me goodbye I over slept. Actually forgot to set the alarm so I woke up at 7:15 when my cellphone alarm went off. The steady rain outside didn’t make it worthwhile to get out of bed but I had to nonetheless.

Walked to the bus stop and got on, rode the bus to 11th Street when the bus crapped out and it was everyone off the bus to wait in the rain for the next bus. I didn’t like the look of the crowd standing in the rain so I walked down to 9th Street where thee was an even more unsavory group.

7th Street was just too crowded and I wound up walking to 5th Street where I originally boarded the bus. Read the New Yorker and was soon walking in the rain across town to the office.

By the time I got in I was wet despite wearing a raincoat and carrying a large umbrella. Tom Chin is still around and he looks at me saying, ‘You look wet’.

Today was very busy. Vivek is due to join his business partner in Acapulco tomorrow, Greg Stevens is in Arizona and Tom Chin is more than likely wanking somewhere.

And of course there were errands to run in the pouring rain. Three indifferent bankers at three different banks. After work, I wasn’t sure whether or not to take the subway across town or enjoy a Padron and walk.

Since it was only drizzling on and off I decided to walk. And the cigar was excellent.

Got a phone call on the bus from Pedro who’s going to be in the city tomorrow and wants to hang out. I’m game for it, especially after seeing his latest picture, all tight with six pack abs.

That’s something to look forward to. He needs to get a haircut and he always get it cut in the Village so that’s the plan. What happens after that I couldn’t say.

He wants to have a drink which is fine with me. I can’t stay out late since it is a school night so I’m sure I’ll get an earful on that. Can’t think of anywhere to go though. I’m sure we’ll think of something.

In the meantime, here’s a video that my sister sent me yesterday which made my day.

Me want to go there.